I'm Still Drunk. I Need A Dunkins.
Wow, definitely time to catch up. First tv stuff, and then meme, and then...we'll see. I've kind of got all day (well until 3ish).
[+] Well, first for tv. I'm enjoying Star-Crossed immensely, and I'm really glad that the last act of Arrow (for this season) is focusing so heavily on Thea. I'm pretty pleased with the way that Cristina is being sent off of Grey's and unless it all gets smashed to hell this week (Shondaland...who knows), I think it should all be pretty fitting. Yeah, I know that that's all really brief (and New Girl is still happening, and for some reason, I watched TVD this week for the first time in two years), but as always, Reign just overtakes everything else. So...
[+] I did like this episode a lot, and give it a solid B+, if not A-. I think the pacing is well going into the final act of the season, but there are quite a few threads that need to be tied together now (Clarissa, The Darkness, etc.) The comment that I have on the costumes lately is that, at first, it seemed like they were sort of doing Period Costumes With a Twist. Now, it seems like (other than Catherine and servants), Mary and the LiW especially are wearing Whatever Clothing from Whatever Time Period. That's fine with me but Lola's wedding gown? What was that?
I think that it is definitely intentional on the writers' part that Kenna and Sebastian are starting to find common ground while Francis and Mary...frankly, it really kind of felt like this might be the moment that will slowly start to turn them into Catherine and Henry. Catherine has been warning Mary and warning her...I wonder if she will start to see it.
I can't say that I exactly enjoyed Bash and Francis acting brotherly, but it's not that it annoyed me either, I guess it just wasn't a stand-out scene for me? I will say that it felt quite natural. After reading the script for the pilot (thanks again, kadie_darling, and if anyone ever finds a link to the rest of the scripts, please let us know!) I realized that Bash and Francis are meant to be only a year apart when I originally thought that they were more like five years apart. It changes things, and makes me see that they were more raised as equals/rivals/playmates rather thant Big Brother/Little Brother. But I think from a very young age, Diane taught Bash to listen and sort of be vague and ambivalent with Francis and I saw Bash being very careful with what he said. Francis, as usual, think he is the only person on the planet. I think that Bash is still very much in love with Mary in his heart but he is moving on, because he knows he has to, to survive.
Which of course brings us to Bash and Kenna. FWIW, I've seen a LOT of B/K fic popping up, and I've always kind of had the inkling that F/M was far more popular than B/M and I'm wondering how much people are getting behind B/K just to keep Bash away from Mary (not trying to advocate for a ship war or anything, I am way too old for that business). I do have to say I'm digging Bash and Kenna, for whatever they're worth. They're these two kids (and they definitely *are* kids to me, at eighteen and sixteen, or somewhere around there) being thrust together literally at swordpoint, and they are trying to make the best of the situation. While I definitely don't see the passion Bash has/had for Mary between them, I think that however this situation is resolved (maybe the marriage will be annulled, I truly don't think that they'll be married for the rest of the series), they are going to be connected for the rest of their lives. I'm out of date with this show, but I sort of see a connection like Stefan and Caroline in TVD?
It's tough to objectively say Right and Wrong in regards to Francis and Mary in this episode. I think I've been pretty clear that I'm not a huge fan of Francis, but as royals and as leaders, they really *should* put their countries first. I've said it before, but just to reiterate my stance, I think that Francis looks at France as his to own, and Mary looks at Scotland as hers to serve. The fact was that Francis needed Mary to complete his diplomatic work with the Vatican, but this was absolutely not the way to do it, and she has now said that she flat out will *not* help him. So Dumb Dauphin, once again. Francis (and maybe it has a whole lot to do with TR's portrayal) just always comes across as a little boy trying to play at Kings & Knights. Not nearly as sinister but quite like Joffrey on GoT.
I really liked James and hope we see more of him. Of course, no one would ever accuse this show of following its history to a 't', but James and Mary were always close and he was one of her most trusted advisors.
I don't know if that's we'll see the last of Olivia, and I enjoyed her with Nostradamus. I think she could be an interesting character, in that she was a respected debutante, falled to ruin by being the dauphin's mistress and then everything that happened to her after the fact, and she could be *really* interesting as the court seer's mistress, but I think the writers didn't know what to do with her in this already inflated cast, so I wouldn't be surprised if that's it for her.
This show really drives home the whole heavy is the head that wears the crown. While I think that Bash would always be 100% behind Mary, I think that down the line it might affect him to be second fiddle to her realm (or their family coming second).
One thing I'm hoping for in the second season is for the writers to hit some sort of stride with pacing, and not race through history (Francis especially had a pretty short life), and I think they get really excited about their original characters and all of this world building, but then they can't spend a good amount of time on them, with all of the ~history they have to cover.
I'm so glad that Penelope is gone. She really aggravated me, and not to be prudish, but I feel like the BDSM stuff is kind of clouding what's really going on with Henry and I really want to get into the nitty gritty of what his visions and madness are all about. (And as far as we know, the visions came after the madness.)
As for Lola and Greer and their husband/fiance/military boyfriend, I think it's pretty obvious that Lord Julian is broke, and needs Lola's dowry to get by. Maybe he is on the run from Hungary? This is absolutely not a spoiler, but I follow a lot of the Reign cast on Instagram (as I'm sure many of you do), and Jonathan Keltz and Giacomo Gianotti (Leith and Julian, respectively) seem to be very involved in promoting the show, and in with the cast, so to me that says that they'll have bigger roles to play in the second season?
[+]Back to the meme that won't die, I'm going to just skip around, because if I don't, I will never finish it. So yeah, back to the Unspecified Amount of Days of OTP's meme. The next chronological day is Fluffiest OTP, and let me tell you, I am fucking stumped. Even couples that don't have death and fire raining down on them go through some realistic stuff that is maybe even more heartbreaking than rains of fire? I don't know. I might come back to it, I might re-categorize it. Whatever. Stop overthinking it!
This is another category that had *a lot* of competition. I'll explain my reasonings after this gorgeous vid...
ELENA GILBERT & STEFAN SALVATORE (THE VAMPIRE DIARIES)
See above, I haven't *really* watched this show in like two years. So...I do realize that I'm missing a lot of the context of their story. But I heard about the E/S AU going on, and yeah, it's just really easy for me to watch Nina and Paul kissing. So why them, on this day? Well, first of all, TVD is a super angsty show, angsty on purpose. Not heartbreaking, the way, say, Friday Night Lights or even New Girl, and not devastating the way Spartacus was, but *angsty*, with all the teenager drama set against vampires and curses and different realms of existence and whatnot. And Elena and Stefan, my poor, unfortunate OTP for the show, got it all thrown at them. It was always hard to be an E/S shipper, with the overwhelming popularity of D/E, but it seemed kind of funny to me that while Damon is often touted as the 'bad boy' of the Salvatore brothers, Stefan is really the one who's had some really dark shit in his past. And the more entrenched we got in Elena's life, and saw how loss is pretty much the overwhelming theme of her life, it struck me how beautifully happy these two were, and how loving and trusting, and how they worked together to overcome obstacles, and occasionally when they got a moment of bliss to be happy teenagers, it was kind of magical. And I will forever hold it (even without the context of Damon and Elena's romance) that in her moment of truth, Elena chose Stefan. I realize that the focus of the show has shifted and I'm not necessarily hoping or waiting for an E/S endgame, but I do remember Elena saying it's always going to be Stefan, and I think that no matter what, freaky doppelganger connection or not, whether they can ever be together or if they never kiss again, they are each other's ideal of happiness, at its best.
I went back and forth with this one, because this couple fit in a LOT of slots for me, and the two of them going to war was born out of tragedy, but these two are just magnificent in battle (and really, everything).
CRIXUS & NAEVIA (SPARTACUS)
I don't know if anyone's following along with this, for couples that we do not have in common, and I know that this particular video is kind of confusing for the Lesley-Ann/Cynthia split (the character was played by two different actresses in season 1&2/3&4), but it just sent chills down my spine, showing my lady's story. Okay, so a 'brief' synopsis of Crixus and Naevia. Crixus was a gladiator (a real historical character) and Naevia was the body slave of the domina of the house, and they fell in love, but see they were breaking the rules because she was meant to be saving her virginity for some gift or sacrifice, and he was sort of the personal love slave of Naevia's domina. When they were found out, he was whipped raw, and she was sold off, on a tour of rape and torture and eventually to the mines. By this time, Crixus, Spartacus and the rest of the gladiators had broken out of the ludus, and they rescued her from the mines (this is very brief, there was a lot of back and forth and twists and turns before that). Crixus trained her to use a sword, and she wound up being his second in command on their own campaign to take Rome (spoiler...it didn't end well). But still, these two are glorious, for so many reasons. And I am totally bouncing in my seat for Slade Wilson and Amanda Walker to cross paths on Arrow.
BLAIR WALDORF & SERENA VAN DER WOODSEN (GOSSIP GIRL)
These two...soulmates doesn't cover it, and frankly, it's far too pretty of a word to describe the complex, intricate, dark relationship that these two had. They were literally like two halves of the same person. They loved each other madly, and would absolutely murder each other in a fit of passion. They were just extremes all the time- extreme love, extreme betrayal, extreme jealousy, extreme pride in each other. I miss this show. This show, maybe more than any other, had me losing my mind, over and over again.
Day 01 - OTP Because OTP (Because Who Would Even Argue) Eric/Tami (Friday Night Lights)
Day 02 - Current OTP Emery/Roman (Star-Crossed)
Day 03 - OTP That Started Your Fannish Journey Veronica/Weevil (Veronica Mars)
Day 04 - OT3+ Ethan/Kristina/Johnny (General Hospital
Day 05 - OTP For Whom You Never Seem To Run Out Of Inspiration Ethan/Kristina (General Hospital)
Day 06 - Crossover OTP Blair/Tommy (Gossip Girl/Warrior)
Day 07 - Real People OTP John Mayer/Taylor Swift
Day 08 - OTP That Has Put You Through The Ringer Alex/Izzie (Grey's Anatomy)
Day 09 - Endgame OTP Dany/Jon (Game of Thrones)
Day 10 - NonCanon OTP Diona/Gannicus (Spartacus)
Day 11 - Guilty Pleasure OTP Puck/Quinn (Glee)
Day 12 - Out Of Your Comfort Zone OTP Bonnie/Damon (The Vampire Diaries)
Day 13 - Star Crossed OTP Bash/Mary (Reign)
Day 14 - Childhood OTP (Before You Knew What Shipping Was) Michaela/Sully (Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman)
Day 15 - Fluffy OTP
Day 16 - Angstiest OTP Elena/Stefan (The Vampire Diaries)
Day 17 - Hardcore/Kickass OTP Crixus/Naevia (Spartacus)
Day 18 - Sexiest OTP
Day 19 - Not Necessarily Romantic OTP Blair/Serena (Gossip Girl)
Day 20 - Best Kiss/Best Kissers
Day 21 - Movie OTP
Day 22 - Book OTP
Day 23 - OTP That You Grew To Love
Day 24 - You're Standing Alone With This OTP (You Don't Care)
Day 25 - Bad Timing OTP
Day 26 - OTP That You Relate To The Most Jess/Nick (New Girl)
Day 27 - OTP That You Always Forget To Talk About
Day 28 - OTP With The Best Canon Story
Day 29 - OTP For Whom You Have The Most Head Canon
Day 30 - OTP of OTP's
And that might be it for a while. I'm still really brainstorming on what the rest of the categories might be, and I might end up re-thinking them.
[+] Today is the Boston marathon. I'm not participating in any way, because I am here at my office by myself, manning the phones while everyone else is at the Red Sox game. Still, it's a really big day for the city, especially this year, and I've had a few requests to do a Boston post, so let me lay down some facts for you. First, read this: 21 Things You Have To Explain To Out-of-Towner's About Boston. Obviously, a lot of them are really broad stereotypes. And a lot of them are stereotypes, but absolutely true.
First up, #4...I don't know if it happens all over the place, or all over the US where there is a real distinctive accent, but...when people come up to me with this particular phrase, I want to slap somebody. And not because I throw tantrums when people make fun of me, but a not-genuine Boston accent is basically the worst sound in the world to me. It's very, very difficult for me to watch movies where Hollywood actors are butchering the accent, or just letting a New York/Long Island get them by (I'm looking at you, Alec Baldwin). I will never watch The Town, for any reason, and believe me, I've tried. Stereotype or not, I truly feel like every movie that is going to make a big deal about being explicitly set in Boston *must* star Mark Wahlberg, Matt Damon, one of the Afflecks, Chris Evans, Shawn Hatosy, or...I don't know, if you've got another name, throw it at me.
#5...Nobody says that any more, it's not a thing.
#19...I DIDN'T, HENCE WHY I'VE BEEN WRITING THIS ENTRY FOR THREE HOURS. (And getting paid for it, so I won't complain.)
#20...I literally could not care less. This is also not a thing. But fizzy, carbonated drinks such as Coke, Pepsi and Sprite? Are called tonic.
#21...I won't comment.
What else can I say about this city? I love it, I'm very happy that it's my home. I'm trying to think of a few more bullet point stuff I can throw at you:
-If you were born in the greater Boston area, and had a marginally happy childhood (or in the majority of cases, even if you didn't), you are going to live her for the rest of your life. We really just don't leave.
-If you were born in the greater Boston area, you are probably six degrees of separation, or less, from absolutely everyone in the state who is the same age as you, give or take four years.
Both of these videos are hilarious to me, probably not for the reasons you think:
MA, DID YOU BLEACH MY SHELL TOES?
<<<333
[+] Well, first for tv. I'm enjoying Star-Crossed immensely, and I'm really glad that the last act of Arrow (for this season) is focusing so heavily on Thea. I'm pretty pleased with the way that Cristina is being sent off of Grey's and unless it all gets smashed to hell this week (Shondaland...who knows), I think it should all be pretty fitting. Yeah, I know that that's all really brief (and New Girl is still happening, and for some reason, I watched TVD this week for the first time in two years), but as always, Reign just overtakes everything else. So...
[+] I did like this episode a lot, and give it a solid B+, if not A-. I think the pacing is well going into the final act of the season, but there are quite a few threads that need to be tied together now (Clarissa, The Darkness, etc.) The comment that I have on the costumes lately is that, at first, it seemed like they were sort of doing Period Costumes With a Twist. Now, it seems like (other than Catherine and servants), Mary and the LiW especially are wearing Whatever Clothing from Whatever Time Period. That's fine with me but Lola's wedding gown? What was that?
I think that it is definitely intentional on the writers' part that Kenna and Sebastian are starting to find common ground while Francis and Mary...frankly, it really kind of felt like this might be the moment that will slowly start to turn them into Catherine and Henry. Catherine has been warning Mary and warning her...I wonder if she will start to see it.
I can't say that I exactly enjoyed Bash and Francis acting brotherly, but it's not that it annoyed me either, I guess it just wasn't a stand-out scene for me? I will say that it felt quite natural. After reading the script for the pilot (thanks again, kadie_darling, and if anyone ever finds a link to the rest of the scripts, please let us know!) I realized that Bash and Francis are meant to be only a year apart when I originally thought that they were more like five years apart. It changes things, and makes me see that they were more raised as equals/rivals/playmates rather thant Big Brother/Little Brother. But I think from a very young age, Diane taught Bash to listen and sort of be vague and ambivalent with Francis and I saw Bash being very careful with what he said. Francis, as usual, think he is the only person on the planet. I think that Bash is still very much in love with Mary in his heart but he is moving on, because he knows he has to, to survive.
Which of course brings us to Bash and Kenna. FWIW, I've seen a LOT of B/K fic popping up, and I've always kind of had the inkling that F/M was far more popular than B/M and I'm wondering how much people are getting behind B/K just to keep Bash away from Mary (not trying to advocate for a ship war or anything, I am way too old for that business). I do have to say I'm digging Bash and Kenna, for whatever they're worth. They're these two kids (and they definitely *are* kids to me, at eighteen and sixteen, or somewhere around there) being thrust together literally at swordpoint, and they are trying to make the best of the situation. While I definitely don't see the passion Bash has/had for Mary between them, I think that however this situation is resolved (maybe the marriage will be annulled, I truly don't think that they'll be married for the rest of the series), they are going to be connected for the rest of their lives. I'm out of date with this show, but I sort of see a connection like Stefan and Caroline in TVD?
It's tough to objectively say Right and Wrong in regards to Francis and Mary in this episode. I think I've been pretty clear that I'm not a huge fan of Francis, but as royals and as leaders, they really *should* put their countries first. I've said it before, but just to reiterate my stance, I think that Francis looks at France as his to own, and Mary looks at Scotland as hers to serve. The fact was that Francis needed Mary to complete his diplomatic work with the Vatican, but this was absolutely not the way to do it, and she has now said that she flat out will *not* help him. So Dumb Dauphin, once again. Francis (and maybe it has a whole lot to do with TR's portrayal) just always comes across as a little boy trying to play at Kings & Knights. Not nearly as sinister but quite like Joffrey on GoT.
I really liked James and hope we see more of him. Of course, no one would ever accuse this show of following its history to a 't', but James and Mary were always close and he was one of her most trusted advisors.
I don't know if that's we'll see the last of Olivia, and I enjoyed her with Nostradamus. I think she could be an interesting character, in that she was a respected debutante, falled to ruin by being the dauphin's mistress and then everything that happened to her after the fact, and she could be *really* interesting as the court seer's mistress, but I think the writers didn't know what to do with her in this already inflated cast, so I wouldn't be surprised if that's it for her.
This show really drives home the whole heavy is the head that wears the crown. While I think that Bash would always be 100% behind Mary, I think that down the line it might affect him to be second fiddle to her realm (or their family coming second).
One thing I'm hoping for in the second season is for the writers to hit some sort of stride with pacing, and not race through history (Francis especially had a pretty short life), and I think they get really excited about their original characters and all of this world building, but then they can't spend a good amount of time on them, with all of the ~history they have to cover.
I'm so glad that Penelope is gone. She really aggravated me, and not to be prudish, but I feel like the BDSM stuff is kind of clouding what's really going on with Henry and I really want to get into the nitty gritty of what his visions and madness are all about. (And as far as we know, the visions came after the madness.)
As for Lola and Greer and their husband/fiance/military boyfriend, I think it's pretty obvious that Lord Julian is broke, and needs Lola's dowry to get by. Maybe he is on the run from Hungary? This is absolutely not a spoiler, but I follow a lot of the Reign cast on Instagram (as I'm sure many of you do), and Jonathan Keltz and Giacomo Gianotti (Leith and Julian, respectively) seem to be very involved in promoting the show, and in with the cast, so to me that says that they'll have bigger roles to play in the second season?
[+]Back to the meme that won't die, I'm going to just skip around, because if I don't, I will never finish it. So yeah, back to the Unspecified Amount of Days of OTP's meme. The next chronological day is Fluffiest OTP, and let me tell you, I am fucking stumped. Even couples that don't have death and fire raining down on them go through some realistic stuff that is maybe even more heartbreaking than rains of fire? I don't know. I might come back to it, I might re-categorize it. Whatever. Stop overthinking it!
This is another category that had *a lot* of competition. I'll explain my reasonings after this gorgeous vid...
ELENA GILBERT & STEFAN SALVATORE (THE VAMPIRE DIARIES)
Click to viewSee above, I haven't *really* watched this show in like two years. So...I do realize that I'm missing a lot of the context of their story. But I heard about the E/S AU going on, and yeah, it's just really easy for me to watch Nina and Paul kissing. So why them, on this day? Well, first of all, TVD is a super angsty show, angsty on purpose. Not heartbreaking, the way, say, Friday Night Lights or even New Girl, and not devastating the way Spartacus was, but *angsty*, with all the teenager drama set against vampires and curses and different realms of existence and whatnot. And Elena and Stefan, my poor, unfortunate OTP for the show, got it all thrown at them. It was always hard to be an E/S shipper, with the overwhelming popularity of D/E, but it seemed kind of funny to me that while Damon is often touted as the 'bad boy' of the Salvatore brothers, Stefan is really the one who's had some really dark shit in his past. And the more entrenched we got in Elena's life, and saw how loss is pretty much the overwhelming theme of her life, it struck me how beautifully happy these two were, and how loving and trusting, and how they worked together to overcome obstacles, and occasionally when they got a moment of bliss to be happy teenagers, it was kind of magical. And I will forever hold it (even without the context of Damon and Elena's romance) that in her moment of truth, Elena chose Stefan. I realize that the focus of the show has shifted and I'm not necessarily hoping or waiting for an E/S endgame, but I do remember Elena saying it's always going to be Stefan, and I think that no matter what, freaky doppelganger connection or not, whether they can ever be together or if they never kiss again, they are each other's ideal of happiness, at its best.
I went back and forth with this one, because this couple fit in a LOT of slots for me, and the two of them going to war was born out of tragedy, but these two are just magnificent in battle (and really, everything).
CRIXUS & NAEVIA (SPARTACUS)
I don't know if anyone's following along with this, for couples that we do not have in common, and I know that this particular video is kind of confusing for the Lesley-Ann/Cynthia split (the character was played by two different actresses in season 1&2/3&4), but it just sent chills down my spine, showing my lady's story. Okay, so a 'brief' synopsis of Crixus and Naevia. Crixus was a gladiator (a real historical character) and Naevia was the body slave of the domina of the house, and they fell in love, but see they were breaking the rules because she was meant to be saving her virginity for some gift or sacrifice, and he was sort of the personal love slave of Naevia's domina. When they were found out, he was whipped raw, and she was sold off, on a tour of rape and torture and eventually to the mines. By this time, Crixus, Spartacus and the rest of the gladiators had broken out of the ludus, and they rescued her from the mines (this is very brief, there was a lot of back and forth and twists and turns before that). Crixus trained her to use a sword, and she wound up being his second in command on their own campaign to take Rome (spoiler...it didn't end well). But still, these two are glorious, for so many reasons. And I am totally bouncing in my seat for Slade Wilson and Amanda Walker to cross paths on Arrow.
BLAIR WALDORF & SERENA VAN DER WOODSEN (GOSSIP GIRL)
These two...soulmates doesn't cover it, and frankly, it's far too pretty of a word to describe the complex, intricate, dark relationship that these two had. They were literally like two halves of the same person. They loved each other madly, and would absolutely murder each other in a fit of passion. They were just extremes all the time- extreme love, extreme betrayal, extreme jealousy, extreme pride in each other. I miss this show. This show, maybe more than any other, had me losing my mind, over and over again.
Day 01 - OTP Because OTP (Because Who Would Even Argue) Eric/Tami (Friday Night Lights)
Day 02 - Current OTP Emery/Roman (Star-Crossed)
Day 03 - OTP That Started Your Fannish Journey Veronica/Weevil (Veronica Mars)
Day 04 - OT3+ Ethan/Kristina/Johnny (General Hospital
Day 05 - OTP For Whom You Never Seem To Run Out Of Inspiration Ethan/Kristina (General Hospital)
Day 06 - Crossover OTP Blair/Tommy (Gossip Girl/Warrior)
Day 07 - Real People OTP John Mayer/Taylor Swift
Day 08 - OTP That Has Put You Through The Ringer Alex/Izzie (Grey's Anatomy)
Day 09 - Endgame OTP Dany/Jon (Game of Thrones)
Day 10 - NonCanon OTP Diona/Gannicus (Spartacus)
Day 11 - Guilty Pleasure OTP Puck/Quinn (Glee)
Day 12 - Out Of Your Comfort Zone OTP Bonnie/Damon (The Vampire Diaries)
Day 13 - Star Crossed OTP Bash/Mary (Reign)
Day 14 - Childhood OTP (Before You Knew What Shipping Was) Michaela/Sully (Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman)
Day 15 - Fluffy OTP
Day 16 - Angstiest OTP Elena/Stefan (The Vampire Diaries)
Day 17 - Hardcore/Kickass OTP Crixus/Naevia (Spartacus)
Day 18 - Sexiest OTP
Day 19 - Not Necessarily Romantic OTP Blair/Serena (Gossip Girl)
Day 20 - Best Kiss/Best Kissers
Day 21 - Movie OTP
Day 22 - Book OTP
Day 23 - OTP That You Grew To Love
Day 24 - You're Standing Alone With This OTP (You Don't Care)
Day 25 - Bad Timing OTP
Day 26 - OTP That You Relate To The Most Jess/Nick (New Girl)
Day 27 - OTP That You Always Forget To Talk About
Day 28 - OTP With The Best Canon Story
Day 29 - OTP For Whom You Have The Most Head Canon
Day 30 - OTP of OTP's
And that might be it for a while. I'm still really brainstorming on what the rest of the categories might be, and I might end up re-thinking them.
[+] Today is the Boston marathon. I'm not participating in any way, because I am here at my office by myself, manning the phones while everyone else is at the Red Sox game. Still, it's a really big day for the city, especially this year, and I've had a few requests to do a Boston post, so let me lay down some facts for you. First, read this: 21 Things You Have To Explain To Out-of-Towner's About Boston. Obviously, a lot of them are really broad stereotypes. And a lot of them are stereotypes, but absolutely true.
First up, #4...I don't know if it happens all over the place, or all over the US where there is a real distinctive accent, but...when people come up to me with this particular phrase, I want to slap somebody. And not because I throw tantrums when people make fun of me, but a not-genuine Boston accent is basically the worst sound in the world to me. It's very, very difficult for me to watch movies where Hollywood actors are butchering the accent, or just letting a New York/Long Island get them by (I'm looking at you, Alec Baldwin). I will never watch The Town, for any reason, and believe me, I've tried. Stereotype or not, I truly feel like every movie that is going to make a big deal about being explicitly set in Boston *must* star Mark Wahlberg, Matt Damon, one of the Afflecks, Chris Evans, Shawn Hatosy, or...I don't know, if you've got another name, throw it at me.
#5...Nobody says that any more, it's not a thing.
#19...I DIDN'T, HENCE WHY I'VE BEEN WRITING THIS ENTRY FOR THREE HOURS. (And getting paid for it, so I won't complain.)
#20...I literally could not care less. This is also not a thing. But fizzy, carbonated drinks such as Coke, Pepsi and Sprite? Are called tonic.
#21...I won't comment.
What else can I say about this city? I love it, I'm very happy that it's my home. I'm trying to think of a few more bullet point stuff I can throw at you:
-If you were born in the greater Boston area, and had a marginally happy childhood (or in the majority of cases, even if you didn't), you are going to live her for the rest of your life. We really just don't leave.
-If you were born in the greater Boston area, you are probably six degrees of separation, or less, from absolutely everyone in the state who is the same age as you, give or take four years.
Both of these videos are hilarious to me, probably not for the reasons you think:
MA, DID YOU BLEACH MY SHELL TOES?
<<<333