April 24th, 1998. We'd gone out to a movie. We went out to lots of movies. We got home sometime in the early evening, maybe 8 or 9, and the house was quiet. I went upstairs and caught a glimpse into my grandmother's apartment. Something wasn't right. She was lying on the floor. Her eyes were closed and her lips were black ( Read more... )

One of the absolute highlights of my time in Virginia was spending last Friday evening in Lexington at my uncle Kent's house while he told stories and answered questions about my grandmother and her mother and grandmother. Allan, Laura, Toby, and Allan's kids all sat with us while Kent held court. I learned a lot about the strong women in my family ( Read more... )

Possible TW for suicide and death.

NPR had a really interesting story this morning on one woman's choice to end her life, and to prepare her family for it ( Read more... )

I'm not sure what I believe about afterlife and spirits and communication with the departed and all that, but it sure seems like Marma is looking out for me right now. I think about her a lot, but last night I spent a longer-than-usual amount of time just sort of meditating on how awesome she was. Then this morning, I got an email from my uncle, ( Read more... )

My nine-year-old (!!!) niece Lucy recently finished a school project where she had to write an essay about one of her grandparents. She wrote about my dad, and the details she included are just so precious. Precious that he thought it was important to share, and precious that she thought it should be featured in his life story. The first time he ( Read more... )

I'm not to the point yet where getting older myself is a concern, but the indirect implications are what bother me. I'm a couple hours away from 30 now, and as the baby of my family, to turn over another decade feels like the whole family gets pushed older, you know? Mom and Dad are 40+ years older than me. If I'm 30, they're 70something. My ( Read more... )

I had a very vivid dream last night that Marma was the daytime caretaker for my nieces.  I would come home from work each day and she'd be playing with them, and then I would take over so she could rest.  My brother and Rachel weren't *out* of the picture, they just weren't really in this dream.  It made sense in my sleep ( Read more... )

I'm incredibly busy this week, with little time to stop and exhale, but I wanted to do a quick update before too many details slip away unrecorded ( Read more... )

I think about Marma every day, but especially on April 11th, her birthday.  My father's mother would be 104 today.  This morning, I have been reflecting on how much she loved her family, and not just grandchildren but siblings, nieces, nephews, and cousins several times removed.  Every day I would charge into her apartment demanding her attention ( Read more... )

It's been 13 years now since my grandmother died, but her best friend, Virginia Page, is still alive and maintains a close relationship with our family. VP is in her 90s, sharp as ever, and more or less healthy. She fell and shattered a hip back in December, and I spent a lot of time with her while she was in Charlottesville at the rehab hospital ( Read more... )