Life will go on, but some things can never be forgiven. It will be with me all the rest of my days, like a tiny pebble in my boot.

Happy Birthday, Sean. You would have been 27 today. You have a new niece. Her name is Leeah. You would have loved her.

Really, I'll eventually get back in the LJ habit. I think about it often. Been spending a lot of time in the shallow end of teh interwebs these last many months. It's been about the roughest 6 months I've ever had. My stepfather died. Jerry is selling the frame shop and had to let me go at the end of October. My father suddenly passed away last ( Read more... )

Six years.

It has been an incredibly long day. Luckily I had Xmas rush jobs to finish at the frame shop including a bloody effing huge  very large Chinese scroll frame job from start to finish, and a 100-year old needlepointed former footstool cover that needed to be finished (I'd done the blocking for it last Wednesday, but it wasn't dry enough on Thursday ( Read more... )

Oh fuck! I can't tell you what the sight of fire trucks and ambulances outside my apartment did to my head! It was five years ago all over again.

I need a drink. Going to find alcohol now.

Life just keeps getting better and better.

And that's about as much as I can stand of talking about life lately.

 Well, at least I finally figured out what's been so wrong with me these last few weeks. Even when you think you've managed to forget, your subconcious never does---and I had managed to forget (conciously) until my brother called to see how I was on Monday. My subconcious, however, has spent several weeks acting out. Maybe now that I know what the ( Read more... )

 I could have been really morose and depressed this weekend. The mister is oncall. My computer is dying. Money is non existent, and the weather was supposed to suck (so we've been playing the snow removal waiting game since midnight). I'm dealing with the emotional flotsam and jetsam involved with watching someone I love but can never be with ( Read more... )

yearning:nounprolonged unfulfilled desire or need Synonyms: appetite, ardor, aspiration, avidity, craving, desire, drive, eagerness, earnestness, emulation, energy, enterprise, enthusiasm, hankering*, hope, hunger, initiative, itch*, keenness, longing, love, lust, moxie*, passion, pretension, push, right stuff*, spirit, striving, thirst, vigor,  ( Read more... )