[picspam] Like A Virgin - Gay For Kahlan partaaay!
You know why this took 9 months to finish? BECAUSE IT IS ABOUT THE KISSING PARTS. If you have ever tried to screencap people making out, I think you will be familiar with the problem I've been having. You go find the right scene, and you get ready to find the bit you need a pic of… and then you just keep watching! It's the perfect way to never ever get anything done.
This is probably not suitable for you if you're under 15.
WHICH IS WHY YOU LOVE IT!
PREEMPTIVE DISCLAIMER
I post this in good humour and with great affection
for the cast and crew of Legend of the Seeker.
It is not my intention to offend
This party is dedicated to mippippippi with love from 7thketch who won it on her behalf as part of the help_haiti charity fandom auction.
♬ 2x04 for the very first tiiiiiime. :P
FORGIVE ME MOTHER CONFESSOR, FOR I HAVE SINNED
IT HAS BEEN 9 MONTHS SINCE MY LAST GAY FOR KAHLAN PARTY.
Just like for Kahlan, it has been a while am I right? ;D
(hjea totally pointed out 9 months gestation means this is the lovechild of GFK:PWP! Funnest. Pregnancy. Evar.)
Anyways! Kahlan's pretty upset that we waited this long between partays.
She's literally been kicking asses for the last 4 months to try and get our attention:
She even raided the closets at Denna's brothel had a makeover to get us to look!
Kahlan makes a last ditch attempt by deploying her collapsable bodice 1
UNF. Our attention: You have it!
Introducing the compelling Ms Kahlan Amnell
Spokesperson for L'Oréal Midlands (Edit: LOLLL)
Ambassador of AWESOMELAND,
President of the HOTTER-THAN-YOU CLUB,
AND 5-TIME WINNER OF MIDLANDS MONTHLY'S MOST CHARMING SMILE AWARD.
Despite our favourite Confessor's many accolades, there is still one notch missing from her belt.
OR SHOULD I SAY, HER BEDPOST??
FANS: Please, just ONE notch?!
WRITERS: OKAY! ...But you have to wait 2 weeks for for it.
FANS:
So now we have to wait ANOTHER WHOLE WEEK until Kahlan gets laid...
...Which seems a little unfair, because certain other people are busy notching like it's going out of style.
I guess we should have known it'd be a long and sexless road for Kahlan right from the beginning.
I mean, all the signs were there:
Kahlan wears a lot of pretty (and swooshy!) white…
…Which is not symbolic AT ALL :PPP
The Virgin Mother Confessor
LOLLLLL
If Kahlan got away with being a virgin before, someone engraving it into a
bathoom door wall in a palace full of crazy fangirls probably won't help her reputation.
THANKS FOR NOTHING, GUYS.
I'M NOT THE 40 YEAR OLD VIRGIN JUST YET OKAY.
I HAVE PROSPECTS.
ORLY?
YESRLY. WHEEL IN THE PROOF!
Evidence 1a: 2x11 ‘Torn’ promo.
*2.5 million screaming fangirls shatter the sound barrier*
(Very important detail shot)
(Also very important.)
gif by hjea
Well then!
If Kahlan is going to be Like a Virgin for a limited time only* it only seems fitting to host a hootenanny! :D
*CONDITIONS:
This offer may be revised at any time by Dizney™.
Coitus is not guaranteed, and even if it does happen you may only see some leg (Legs! Legs! Legs! 3)
and an artistic camera pan toward a moon looking pregnant (!) with anticipation.
MOON: I see you gettin' horizontal down thar!
In the off-chance that the sex is satisfactorily visual, chances are Kahlan will
a) Forget about the sex due to convenient magic spell
b) Time travel back to the beginning of the ep and it will never have happened
c) Drop the C-Bomb (ie: Cara has deflowered her already. A lot.)
You need to click on this banner to read the epically lulzy ficspam by shipperfey
So let us celebrate her upcoming achievement with an abridged retrospective:
Gay For Kahlan: Like A Virgin
Mind if I join you?
:O
But-I'M NAKED.
Yes! And now I get naked…
???
WHY ARE YOUR PANTS COMING OFF?! IS GRAVITY EXTRA STRONG OVER THERE?!?
I can think of some upward motion that would suggest otherwise but okay okay going now!
RICHARD: Isn't this romantic?
KAHLAN: Oh look at that cloud. It's shaped like a really frustrated Seeker audience… how bizarre.
(It's almost kind of cute the way she cockblocks herself when Zedd's not around to do it for her :P)
KAHLAN IS UNDRESSING. YOUR SEXUAL ORIENTATION IS INVALID. 2
Remember that one time when not!Richard worked his reverse-psychology on not!Kahlan and she was like ‘I MUST HIT THAT I CAN'T SAY THAT’.
And every Seeker fan suddenly became really touchy about candles ruining everything in their lives. LIKE THE VIEW.
AND IT WAS A DOUBLE COCKBLOCK FOR KAHLAN BECAUSE OF ZEDD AND THE BODY-STEALING.
Good times!
In an effort to avoid The Candle Censorship Board, Kahlan took Richard to a place with lots of water to make out.
IT WAS ORSUM.
Dear Diary,
Still a virgin.
Love Kahlan x
Kahlan then tried locking herself in a confined space with Richard.
Dear Diary,
Tried getting on top. Still nothing :/
She tried kissing Richard in the morning.
She tried kissing Richard in the afternoon.
She tried kissing Richard in the evening.
Dear Diary,
I think this is what they call purgatory.
Intermission
Super subtle subliminal message to Dizney:
You want to renew Seeker for a third season.
There is also a diagram:
Meanwhile…
Kahlan has the answer to her problem!
Richard I've got an idea!
. . . !
I'm going to teach you everything I know.
:D
:D :D :D
FOR PREZ.
Manip by iloveisbister15
THE END!
I'm never making a sex joke ever again. …At least not until Seeker Sunday :P
1 Line shamelessly stolen from cleolinda's unbeatable Phantom of the Opera in Fifteen Minutes
2 This genius belongs to noblealice :D
GAY FOR KAHLAN PARTAY™ Is a registered trademark of hjea and hollywoodgrrl :D
The partays so far!
Bridget's Boobs! | Kahlan's Hair! | Kahlan Fight!Sex!! | Powers of Pwnage! | Kahlan Plot What Plot! | Kahlan Like A Virgin!
This is probably not suitable for you if you're under 15.
WHICH IS WHY YOU LOVE IT!
PREEMPTIVE DISCLAIMER
I post this in good humour and with great affection
for the cast and crew of Legend of the Seeker.
It is not my intention to offend
This party is dedicated to mippippippi with love from 7thketch who won it on her behalf as part of the help_haiti charity fandom auction.
♬ 2x04 for the very first tiiiiiime. :P
FORGIVE ME MOTHER CONFESSOR, FOR I HAVE SINNED
IT HAS BEEN 9 MONTHS SINCE MY LAST GAY FOR KAHLAN PARTY.
Just like for Kahlan, it has been a while am I right? ;D
(hjea totally pointed out 9 months gestation means this is the lovechild of GFK:PWP! Funnest. Pregnancy. Evar.)
Anyways! Kahlan's pretty upset that we waited this long between partays.
She's literally been kicking asses for the last 4 months to try and get our attention:
She even raided the closets at Denna's brothel had a makeover to get us to look!
Kahlan makes a last ditch attempt by deploying her collapsable bodice 1
UNF. Our attention: You have it!
Introducing the compelling Ms Kahlan Amnell
Spokesperson for L'Oréal Midlands (Edit: LOLLL)
Ambassador of AWESOMELAND,
President of the HOTTER-THAN-YOU CLUB,
AND 5-TIME WINNER OF MIDLANDS MONTHLY'S MOST CHARMING SMILE AWARD.
Despite our favourite Confessor's many accolades, there is still one notch missing from her belt.
OR SHOULD I SAY, HER BEDPOST??
FANS: Please, just ONE notch?!
WRITERS: OKAY! ...But you have to wait 2 weeks for for it.
FANS:
So now we have to wait ANOTHER WHOLE WEEK until Kahlan gets laid...
...Which seems a little unfair, because certain other people are busy notching like it's going out of style.
I guess we should have known it'd be a long and sexless road for Kahlan right from the beginning.
I mean, all the signs were there:
Kahlan wears a lot of pretty (and swooshy!) white…
…Which is not symbolic AT ALL :PPP
The Virgin Mother Confessor
LOLLLLL
If Kahlan got away with being a virgin before, someone engraving it into a
bathoom door wall in a palace full of crazy fangirls probably won't help her reputation.
THANKS FOR NOTHING, GUYS.
I'M NOT THE 40 YEAR OLD VIRGIN JUST YET OKAY.
I HAVE PROSPECTS.
ORLY?
YESRLY. WHEEL IN THE PROOF!
Evidence 1a: 2x11 ‘Torn’ promo.
*2.5 million screaming fangirls shatter the sound barrier*
(Very important detail shot)
(Also very important.)
gif by hjea
Well then!
If Kahlan is going to be Like a Virgin for a limited time only* it only seems fitting to host a hootenanny! :D
*CONDITIONS:
This offer may be revised at any time by Dizney™.
Coitus is not guaranteed, and even if it does happen you may only see some leg (Legs! Legs! Legs! 3)
and an artistic camera pan toward a moon looking pregnant (!) with anticipation.
MOON: I see you gettin' horizontal down thar!
In the off-chance that the sex is satisfactorily visual, chances are Kahlan will
a) Forget about the sex due to convenient magic spell
b) Time travel back to the beginning of the ep and it will never have happened
c) Drop the C-Bomb (ie: Cara has deflowered her already. A lot.)
You need to click on this banner to read the epically lulzy ficspam by shipperfey
So let us celebrate her upcoming achievement with an abridged retrospective:
Gay For Kahlan: Like A Virgin
Mind if I join you?
:O
But-I'M NAKED.
Yes! And now I get naked…
???
WHY ARE YOUR PANTS COMING OFF?! IS GRAVITY EXTRA STRONG OVER THERE?!?
I can think of some upward motion that would suggest otherwise but okay okay going now!
RICHARD: Isn't this romantic?
KAHLAN: Oh look at that cloud. It's shaped like a really frustrated Seeker audience… how bizarre.
(It's almost kind of cute the way she cockblocks herself when Zedd's not around to do it for her :P)
KAHLAN IS UNDRESSING. YOUR SEXUAL ORIENTATION IS INVALID. 2
Remember that one time when not!Richard worked his reverse-psychology on not!Kahlan and she was like ‘I MUST HIT THAT I CAN'T SAY THAT’.
And every Seeker fan suddenly became really touchy about candles ruining everything in their lives. LIKE THE VIEW.
AND IT WAS A DOUBLE COCKBLOCK FOR KAHLAN BECAUSE OF ZEDD AND THE BODY-STEALING.
Good times!
In an effort to avoid The Candle Censorship Board, Kahlan took Richard to a place with lots of water to make out.
IT WAS ORSUM.
Dear Diary,
Still a virgin.
Love Kahlan x
Kahlan then tried locking herself in a confined space with Richard.
Dear Diary,
Tried getting on top. Still nothing :/
She tried kissing Richard in the morning.
She tried kissing Richard in the afternoon.
She tried kissing Richard in the evening.
Dear Diary,
I think this is what they call purgatory.
Intermission
Super subtle subliminal message to Dizney:
You want to renew Seeker for a third season.
There is also a diagram:
Meanwhile…
Kahlan has the answer to her problem!
Richard I've got an idea!
. . . !
I'm going to teach you everything I know.
:D
:D :D :D
FOR PREZ.
Manip by iloveisbister15
THE END!
I'm never making a sex joke ever again. …At least not until Seeker Sunday :P
1 Line shamelessly stolen from cleolinda's unbeatable Phantom of the Opera in Fifteen Minutes
2 This genius belongs to noblealice :D
GAY FOR KAHLAN PARTAY™ Is a registered trademark of hjea and hollywoodgrrl :D
The partays so far!
Bridget's Boobs! | Kahlan's Hair! | Kahlan Fight!Sex!! | Powers of Pwnage! | Kahlan Plot What Plot! | Kahlan Like A Virgin!