After getting over my initial phase of fascination, then disbelief, disgust, and finally acceptance that Herman Cain is a serial molester of women and a pathological liar .... I entered the final phase of amusement. When something pisses me off I'll rant and complain but I'll eventually get down to the business of ridicule.

This final fun phase ( Read more... )

I've been silent on this too long. Not once have I replied to one of those 'writer's block' queries LJ serves up. Most of the time I find the questions uninteresting, some are lame. Even if it's not boring or stupid I just pass. The latest writers block suggestion is possibly the most retarded.

If your pet were arranging a dinner party, who do you ( Read more... )

A joint session of Congress was tackling the vital issue of excessive pork rind prices Topeka. The room is interrupted by a very loud ...... "Ahem, excuse me."

Every congressman and congresswoman in attendance paused mid sentence. Of course they were all talking at the same time but no one was actually listening. They looked at one another with a ' ( Read more... )

I have no use for tweets and I have no intention of pursuing other twitter feeds ...... but this guy is great. I love cranky old man humor, maybe because I'm an old crank.  The kid is tweeting shit his 73 year old father says. The kid is a slacker. The old man is my new hero.

http://twitter.com/shitmydadsays

I don't know what it says about me that I ( Read more... )

WARNING

This post contains material not suitable for all audiences,
especially sensitive persons offended by bathroom humor.

I have the know how and technology to build a bomb so devastating it would be inhuman to drop on civilization. I'm very careful with this knowledge. I would not want it to fall into the wrong hands.

Last week Number-2 walked ( Read more... )

I realize these anecdotes are all from the......'you had to be there' ......category.

Not a day passes without Michelangelo making us laugh. His name does not suit him. It's a classic name, regal, from the renaissance. Mikey fits him but we also call him Butthead. My dog is a clown.

When we dispense ice from the refrigerator he stands ready for the ( Read more... )

I was considering how considerate my dog is.  When we take our morning walk I carry the plastic bag just in case he drops a duece. I won't leave it on my neighbors lawn, or even in the common areas of our neighborhhood where many dog owners let it lie. That irks me ( Read more... )

This topic is a blogjack from a friend's recent post. I expanded, just a little, as I usually do.

There's no doubt a well timed remark, or poorly timed if you're the victim, can be very hurtful. It is lowly to cut someone down with your sharp tongue if they did nothing to deserve your scorn. However, I see sarcasm as a form of wit with levels based ( Read more... )

My last post was an example of my spigot therapy. It was a downer, but I had to write those thoughts to rid my mind of their depressing nature.

Friday morning we took James out for breakfast to the Farm House, an excellent little place in downtown Gilbert. This place is so good people wait on the sidewalk, 30-40 minutes, on a weekday! We waited. He ( Read more... )

In May of last year, when Cheryl moved in, my two car garage became a one car garage. She has so many boxes packed with stuff we had to use 1/2 the garage to store it. Merging two households will always result in redundancy. Some of the items she has boxed were not unpacked because I already have cookware, dishes, decor, etc. Other boxes? I have no ( Read more... )