Where to begin, where to begin. I'm sitting here, at obscene o'clock in the morning, in the deserted international terminal of the Lima airport. I'm waiting for my flight home to Chile, and I have several hours yet to sit on my ass and watch old episodes of the Sopranos, work on some graphic design projects, and ruminate over my trip ( Read more... )

Wow, I have shamefully neglected my earhole-pleasuring duties as of late. Bad bad bad ( Read more... )

I want to wish a happy, happy, happeh birthday to my favorite diacritical mark, MC Schwa, aka Seanly, aka stalkythefish. I'll be toasting you soon enough. :D

I unlocked the secret to Farewell Road Trip Perfection!! Dudes, I think this labyrinth gives me secret knot-untangling powers. I had to completely reverse our course and then, suddenly, all the dates lined up perfectly. My homies' days off, my camping reservations in Acadia, all my junk is stored securely in the trunk, my plan be bona fide, and ( Read more... )

Okay, okay, so I don't want to end the week on that sucknugget note. I have no idea what I'll be doing about my brother, other than doing some serious research into whether or not he's actually adopted and/or the antichrist, but I don't have anything to complain about beyond that. My girly sandpaper_tiger is coming for the whole weekend and we are going to get ( Read more... )

I really, really, really hate seeing people I care about deal with bad news. If I could, I would warp myself into a nine-inch-thick castle wall and encapsulate each and every one of them behind my fortifications. Gawd, if I had a nickel for every time I've wished to have that superpower ( Read more... )

I was going to save this for Tuesday's Embarrassments, but then I remembered that... my OG is comin' to town this weekend, and therefore I am guaranteed to make a fool of myself many, many more times and in far, far more spectacular a fashion before then. Everything from awesomeness to humiliation is a little larger than life when Lex is in town ( Read more... )

On my way in to work, I saw an old Mennonite woman (we have a lot of them here, believe it or not), bonnet and body odor and homemade dress and all, roll out in a gigantic Lincoln Navigator the size of a tank ( Read more... )

A very very merry berfday to m'lady, Garnet, if not slightly belated.   Hooray for greasy Chinese food and pointiness! Issalll ewe. :)

(My brain papillae still hurt. :P )

So I had a long contemplative polyamorous navel-gazing already written for the day and was about to post. But my bestest friend in the whole world just got handed some pretty incredibly fucking awful news and I am completely in shock. I won't get into it, it's her business and not the internet's, but JESUS CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH PEOPLE!??! ( Read more... )