I was going to save this for Tuesday's Embarrassments, but then I remembered that... my OG is comin' to town this weekend, and therefore I am guaranteed to make a fool of myself many, many more times and in far, far more spectacular a fashion before then. Everything from awesomeness to humiliation is a little larger than life when Lex is in town ( Read more... )

On my way in to work, I saw an old Mennonite woman (we have a lot of them here, believe it or not), bonnet and body odor and homemade dress and all, roll out in a gigantic Lincoln Navigator the size of a tank ( Read more... )

Fuck a goat ass, boys and girls, I've been annoyingly emo lately. My last couple of missiles launched blearily into the blogosphere read sort of like half-asleep cries for help. Neau. Bad. It's (almost) FFFriday, and I have a Short List of Awesome to discuss with you fine people ( Read more... )

This sooo made me laugh this morning.

MEATCURTAIN.

( Read more... )

I sort of want to make out with the whole world at large today, boys and girls. It's one of those FFFridays, for various reasons. The kind of Friday that makes my Syrup of Wahoo run higher than an April maple's and my work-related desire to bludgeon myself to death shockingly low. I'll explain more later, but for now, I have a request ( Read more... )

In 12 hours or so (unless ye olde gods of icy runways have some other nefarious plan in mind) I shall be fetching my lovelies ososexilexi and her hub Phil from the airport for The Adventures of Me and She: Part 3. Weee! It's always nice to have company ( Read more... )

Eesh. Okay, it's F.F.Friday, I can't be too dour. Must abandon this week on an upswing ( Read more... )

... and I hope that Bob Barker has a good prize for me.

I guess I'm having a moderately existential morning. The beyooootiful autumn weather (I haven't run the air conditioner in nearly two weeks, which=winter here) combined with the fact that it's F.F.Friday probably tend to bring it out. As soon as a cool breeze whips through my hair, that ( Read more... )

So as if having to work in the fucking circus that is this newspaper graphic design department weren't enough... apparently we also have a creeping black mold problem in the building too ( Read more... )

Lest y'all think I'm dead - or worse, cheating on you with some other phenomenally amusing waste of time, dear ElJay - I would like to make this public service announcement. I've not quite had the ghost beaten out of me just yet, although work is trying to kill me (and chop me up, bury me, leave me there for a few weeks, then dig me up a few weeks ( Read more... )