I need to do a serious update here. I'm not talking about the daily things that I do, but rather a few major things that I never got around to mentioning.

( Big entry for big issues )

Once again, I've proven my capacity to become attached. I found a girl who seems to embody everything that I'm looking for, but the timing is wrong. I'm still not in a position to start dating, with or without my commitment. She needs to concentrate on what she has to be doing. And our paths cross so seldom that I hardly have a chance to know her. ( Read more... )

This post is mostly for blackpenguin15 (mainly because I've locked the entry, so that he's the only one that can read it) because he asked me about a certain time that involved Hannah. I figured that he wouldn't want to wade through all the entries I had made about Hannah, so I compiled it into this entry. It's the short version, but it's still pretty long ( Read more... )

Those who have read enough of my journal should already be familiar with these two women. I want to take the time to compare the relationships. I know you must be sick of it, but it's still something on my mind.

Hannah:what made her so special? In all honesty, I don't remember what caused me to fall for her. I guess she seemed like the nicest, ( Read more... )

IT'S 42 ( Read more... )

Well, first off, I'm going to say that I feel like crap and that I wish that I could go back a year and fix all the stupid things I did, felt, or expressed... I then want to say that I really need to do some serious contemplating about my tastes in women... I then need to say that I really really want to know what the hell made me such an idiot ( Read more... )

So much time has past. I look at myself in the mirror each day wondering if there will be some change. I'm thankful that I can see a difference, but I'm still stuck in so much of the same patterns ( Read more... )

WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH EVERYTHING?!?!?! ERG!!!! DAMNIT ( Read more... )

I don't know what it is. It's the one issue that I never seem to be able to resolve. I can control my anger, I can control my tolerance of people, I can control my urges to beat the crap out of Tyler, but for the love of me I can't keep myself from getting infatuated. I still can't get my mind off of Hannah. I've been doing everything I possibly ( Read more... )

For now, I'll leave this as friends-only, but I may move it to private. For my friends, this will seem a little abrupt and new. I'll be diving into my history a bit, though ( Read more... )