V-Day.: Suju's Free Hug Event- A Crazy Fangirl's Report
Omg.
Omg.
OMG.
OMG.
OMMFG.
Okay, guys-
Woops. I mean, okay guys.
YOU WILL TOTALLY NOT BELIEVE WHAT HAPPENED TO MEH!!!!!!!!!!!!! >=D
I’m literally about to die of a heart attack. RIGHT NOW. But I won’t let myself do it until I tell you all about what just happened! (Am currently writing this from my cell; that’s how much I love you!)
So, let me set this all up- I work in the Sunglass Hut at that new mall that just opened up downtown. And it’s okay working there; I mean the place is shiny and brand-spanking new and all but that doesn’t stop annoying customers from coming in and demanding I shove UV-Ray eye protection at their faces.
BUT ANYWAY. CUZ OMG-
So, I was, like- at work. And stuff. I was just chilling in my little Sunglass Hut, dancing a little to Ring Ding Dong when it came on the radio am I the only one who can’t figure out the “locka locka locka” dance??? and then I SWEAR TO GAWD I THOUGHT I SAW HANKYUNG FROM SUPER JUNIOR IN MY PERIPH.
DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME? HAN- FUCKING- KYUNG OF SUPER- FUCKING- JUNIOR WAS AT MY MALL!!!!!!!!
BEFORE MY VERY EYES!!
BEING ALL STOIC AND CHINESE AND SEXY AND STUFF!!!! D: D: D:
So I did what any logical, sane person would do.
I followed him when he wasn’t looking! :D
And, like- it was SO COOL. Did you know his cell phone charm is the same color as Heechul’s pants in “It’s You”??? ZOMG, ZOMG HANCHUL!! So much Hanchul. I almost had a nosebleed right there, people! WHO WOULDN’T?! They totally love each other. It’s obvious; that totally had to be coordinated couple’s teamwork there, right? RIGHT?!
… But anyway, anyway- and then, like- like- HIS PHONE MESSAGE WENT OFF! And I swear, I ALMOST DIED ON THE SPOT.
Do you know what his text message ringtone is, people?? IT’S MAX’S EPIC SCREAM FROM “Mirotic”!!!!!!
So I thought to myself, “Well, what does that mean?”
And then I realized Hankyung must be in love with Max, too. People- there’s a fucking love triangle here. There’s Hannie and Chullie and Minnie…
OMO!
WHAT IF SIWON’S IN ON IT, TOO? *0*
WHAT IF-
WHAT IF-
WHAT IF DBSK ENDS UP BREAKING OTP’S WITH SUPER JUNIOR?!?!
I SMELL A NEW FANFIC ON THE WAY!! =D
And yeah. Yeah.
Hang on, I can’t breathe that well at the moment. I’m panting. Gawdz, I’m so excited right now!
BUT HANNIE’S PHONE GOT A MAX-SCREAM TEXT MESSAGE AGAIN.
AND AGAIN. AND AGAIN. AND AGAIN. AND AGAIN. AND AGAIN-
AND THEN IT RANG (IT PLAYED “SUPER GIRL,” IN CASE YOU WERE WONDERING- WHY AM I STILL IN CAPS?)
AND THEN HANKYUNG- THAT BEAUTIFUL, BEAUTIFUL FOREIGN BEAUTY- ANSWERED!
And then he hung up and mumbled something like “I can’t deal with this madness!”
And then it rang two more times and he ignored it. And I think he got two voicemails because Max screamed two more times. Epically, of course.
But still- do you know what his voice sounds like when you’re only three feet away from him hiding behind a potted plant in the men’s bathroom???
???
???
????????????
IT SOUNDS LIKE SEX.
It is the literal, unequivocal equivalent to having sex, only without being naked and sweaty.
Hang on… sorry, NC-17 fic mentally flashing in meh mind right now, I can get it out though… Gawsh, I should ask people about that later. I missed that story. So hawt~
ANYWAYZ. Hehe-
So then Hankyung looked at his phone and frowned. And it was the strangest thing- he looked really, really upset. This is kind of how it went:
HK: &*^%&$%&$?*%& (Angry Chinese words 0.0) HEECHUL &*$&#%^#&%^$&%^%$
Me: =D *stares*
HK: RAWR *throws phone into trash can*
Me: =D *stares*
HK: *Max scream sounds and so digs phone out of said trash can with a frown*
Me: =D *stares*
HK: WTF?! *&*^&#%^&$#%^$%^#%#^$%^$%#HEECHULI’LLKILLYOU&@*($&@#^$&#*%$^#%KYUHYUN&*&$^&$^%$^#STARCRAFT*^%*$&%&$^%&%^$%$%IHOPEHECATCHESYOU@#(&*#&%^#$&!!!!!!!!!!! Poor Eunhyuk. *shakes head sadly*
Me: =D =D =D =D
HK: Excuse me, are you in the right bathroom?
Me: *is confused*
Me: *blinks*
Me: =D
HK: Okay, then. Um… the women’s restroom is across the hall. *stares at me oddly*
Me: XDDDDDDDDDDDD
HK: … Goodbye. *slams door*
DID I MENTION HE’S SEXY?!?!
And so, after that I tried to go back to work (after getting yelled at for leaving my post for a good two hours… but who honestly even buys sunglasses anymore, anyway? Geeze) and stuff. But I kept looking over at Hankyung being all stoic and Chinese and beautiful and stuff and I just 0.0 I think I handed someone sunglasses for free. I don’t even care right now cuz…
WHAT DOES A SEVERE CUT IN MY PAYCHECK MATTER WHEN I ACTUALLY GOT TO MEET HANKYUNG?!?!?!?!
Omg, omg omg omg omg omgomgomgomgomgomgomgomgomgomg. I just have to get to the point of my story, for realz.
SUJU’S HAVING A FREE HUG EVENT HERE!!!!!!!!!!!!! Seriously- I can’t even- I don’t even-
Shit, I’m drooling on myself.
SO MUCH HOT BOYZ IT HURTS A LITTLE =D
People, they’re ALL here. Even Kangin!
EVEN KIM KIBUM. And not even the one from SHINee! THE SUPER JUNIOR BRAND KIM KIBUM!!!
My STUPID MANAGER won’t let me leave to see them, but once I get a lunch break, zomg…
I am so raping them with hugs. They will never forget the power of my hugs. I will hug the awesome out of them and then some; and you know what? They’ll still be awesome. Because Super Junior’s awesome comes from a never ending internal well of awesome located in the very LAND of Awesome.
Awesome sauce= Suju.
AND I BET IT TASTES DELICIOUS.
Gawd, so many girls- there’s a line OUT THE DOOR to hug them. It’s so worth it. I’m amazed I can still see all thirteen (+Zhoumi and Henry, of course!) of them from here.
… Wait- where’s Yesung?
NO HUG EVENT IS COMPLETE WITHOUT YESUNG! =0
Oh, wait- there he is. Wow, he JUST got here.
OMG LOOK AT HIM! His hair is just feathery and sexy and I just wanna whisper sweet reptilian nothings into his ear and stroke his philtrum. OMG.
*imagines it all*
*has a nosebleed*
*comes back to life*
OMFG I CAN SEE FROM HERE- THEY’RE DANCING GEE RIGHT NOW!
HEECHUL BROUGHT WIGS! AND SKIRTS! =D
I need to get out of this place!!
I can’t be at work anymore! No one’s here, my manager’s off somewhere that ISN’T the Hug Event because she is INSANE, and BEAUTIFUL MEN ARE BECKONING ME TO HOLD THEM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
WHAT THE FUCK AM I DOING IN THIS SUNGLASS HUT?!?!?!?!?!?!
OMFG.
NO FUCKING WAY.
NO FUCKING WAY.
NO FUCKING WAY!!!!!!
YUNHO FROM THE FREAKING DBSK JUST WALKED INTO MY SUNGLASS HUT.
JAEJOONG FROM THE FREAKING DBSK WALKED IN RIGHT BEHIND HIM, HOLDING HIS FUCKING HAND.
THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE. I CAN DIE AND GO TO HEAVEN, NOW. THANK YOU GOD. THANK YOU SANTA; THANK YOU VISHNU, MUHAMMED, BUDDHA, MOTHER AMATERASU, MOTHER EARTH, ANY MESSIAH THAT HAS EVER EXISTED- BABY JESUS! THANK YOU BABY JESUS. YOU HAVE GIVEN ME YUNJAE PROOF.
OMFG.
T.
O.
P.
JUST WALKED INTO MY STORE.
T.O.P., CHOI SEUNGHYUN OF BIG BANG- omfg.
I’m gonna die now. I’m literally torn- torn!- as to what to do. What am I going to do with myself?? Gawd, look at his sexy manly eyebrows-
Look at Yunho’s MUSCLES!!
LOOK AT JAEJOONG’S… EVERYTHING!
GAH!!!!!!!!!!!!
OTOKE?!?!?!?!?!?!?!
~Fan Girl!OUT~
A/N: I'm going to hope and hope I didn't offend anyone with this XD Seriously, I used my own inner fangirl to write this so OF COURSE I'm even making fun of myself!! lol ^^ So, who's excited for T.O.P.? If it's not who you were expecting, please love him anyway, Ye of Little Faith~! ^___^ (P.S. I wanna thank my friend and roommate azure_enigma for ALWAYS reading my insanity and helping me out!!! =D)
P.S.: Max's epic scream ringtone is my cell ringtone X3 I'm proud of that :D
Comments are LOVE
and
I LOVE YOU ALL!!
<3