SPN/SV Fic: How to Save a Life (1/?)
Title: How to Save a Life
Authors: X_tremeroswellian and Shadow_One
Disclaimer: Not ours. Don’t sue. Thanks.
Rating: R for language and violence.
Author’s Note: This story follows two others, the first titled, “Everything Will Be…” and the second, “Sweet Sacrifice.” If you haven’t read those, you’ll be lost with this one.
Author’s Note 2: The title was obviously inspired by the song “How to Save a Life” by the Fray.
Spoiler warnings: Up through and including “Freak” for Smallville and “Born Under a Bad Sign” for Supernatural.
One | Two | Three | Four | Five | Six | Seven | Eight |
How to Save a Life (Chapter One)
Five year old Michael growled when his brother yet again smacked him with another toy. Getting up, he began to walk away to find his mom, "Mom! Matt won't leave me alone!!"
Sighing softly, Chloe quickly wiped her tearful eyes with the back of her hand and stood up from where she'd been sitting at her desk. She flashed her oldest son a smile before kneeling down in front of him. "What's he doing?"
He pouted, "He keeps hitting me with his trains."
She winced inwardly, his expression so very remnant of his father's. She kissed his forehead and stood up, taking him by the hand and leading him down the hall to the boys' shared room. "Matthew Dean."
Matthew looked up innocently and dropped his toy, "What Mommy?"
If Michael was just like his father, Matthew was just like his uncle. Their interaction consistently reminded her of Dean and Sam Winchester back before everything terrible had happened. "You know you're not supposed to hit your brother."
He put his head down and his eyes watered, "I sorry Mommy."
"Come here, Matthew," she whispered, kneeling on the floor again.
Turning around, he scooted towards his mom and wrapped his arms around her.
Chloe smiled and hugged him back, kissing his cheek. "Be nice to your older brother, okay? He'll always be looking out for you," she whispered in his ear.
He nodded and kissed her cheek, "Okay."
She touched his face and turned to look at Michael, smiling at him again. "Come here, Michael."
Michael did as he was told and came over to her, sitting down beside her.
She wrapped an arm around each of them. "I'm the luckiest mom in the world," she whispered as if she was telling them a secret. "You know why?"
Both the boys looked at her with wide, wondering eyes, "Why Mommy?"
Her green eyes sparkled as she smiled at both of them. "Because I have the best sons in the world."
Wrapping his arms around his mom, Michael smiled, "You're the best Mommy."
She closed her eyes, hugging him back tightly, feeling the tears well up within her once more. She forced herself to take a deep breath and blink them away before either of them could see. "All right, who wants spaghetti for dinner?"
"I do! I do!" Came the excited cries.
Chloe grinned and stood up, taking them each by the hand. "All right, who's gonna set the table for Mommy while she cooks?"
Michael straightened up, "I will."
She gazed at him proudly. "Thank you very much." She smiled.
"You're welcome." Dragging a chair to the cupboard, he began to get plates out.
As his brother walked away, Matthew looked up at Chloe, "When's Uncle Sammy coming home?"
She paused in her tracks, looking down at her youngest son. "Soon, Sweetheart." She smiled faintly.
"Okay....can I help you cook Mommy?"
Chloe smiled. "Sure you can. You wanna grab me that big pot under the cabinet?"
Nodding, he walked over to the cabinet and dragged the pot out onto the floor, then tried to lift it up.
She stifled a grin and started to help him when Michael moved over to his side quickly, helping him pick up the pot. Tears welled in her eyes once more. "Thank you, boys," she whispered, taking the pot from them and setting it on the counter. She rested her hands on the countertop for a moment, shutting her eyes.
"Mommy, are you sad?" Came a quiet voice from behind.
She turned back to face them. "No, Michael, Mommy's not sad. I just have a little headache." She kissed the top of his head, and then the top of Matthew's head, as well. "How could I ever be sad with you two as my babies?"
Michael smiled, "I hope your headache goes away soon."
"I'm sure it will. Why don't you guys get your crayons and coloring books and make Mommy some new artwork for the fridge?" she suggested.
Matthew jumped at the chance and grabbed his brother's hand, and began to drag him away, "Come on!"
Chloe smiled as they headed out to the living room before closing her eyes and sighing softly. Even after four and a half years, some days were so hard to get through without Dean, it hurt. Tucking some hair behind her ear, she washed her hands before dragging out the ingredients for the spaghetti, casting a worried glance at the clock above the stove. Sam should have been home by now, but he wasn't.
And she was starting to grow worried.
That's when the door opened, and a sudden chorus of "Uncle Sam!" rang through the house.
Chloe relaxed instantly, her shoulders slumping with relief. It was approaching that day and she was more on edge than usual.
Walking into the room where Chloe was, Sam smiled, "Hey."
She turned and met his eyes, offering him a small smile. "Hey. Everything okay?"
"Yeah." He sat down on a bar stool and sighed, "Looong day."
Me too, she thought, nodding a little. "Hope you're hungry for spaghetti."
"Sounds great." He said. Frowning a little, he tilted his head, "Bad day?"
Chloe drew in a breath and let it out slowly. "Just a long one," she said softly, her back to him as she went to work, fixing their dinner for the night.
"One of those days where you miss him a lot?"
He knew her way too well. Both a blessing and a curse, depending on the day. She simply nodded wordlessly, knowing he was watching her intently.
"Yeah, same here." He whispered, putting his head down.
Tears prickled at her eyelids at his soft admission and slowly turned to look at him, her eyes sad. "You okay, Sam?"
He shook his head, "Not really."
She slowly moved over to where he was sitting, resting a hand on his shoulder silently.
The barstool creaked softly as he turned toward her and enveloped her in a hug.
Swallowing hard, she slowly wound her arms around him in return, squeezing her eyes shut and choking back a soft sob she felt building. She couldn't break down with the boys in the next room.
Sam rubbed her back and whispered words of comfort to her.
After a long moment, she slowly pulled away, offering him what she hoped was a halfway decent smile. "Thanks," she whispered.
"It's what I'm here for." He whispered back.
Chloe bit her lower lip, gazing at him intently. Over the past four years, the two of them had grown even closer than they had been. He was undoubtedly her best friend, the one person she trusted more than anyone else. And he was in love with her. He'd never directly said the words, but he didn't have to. He'd proven it so many times over the years in little ways. The way he looked after her and the boys, the way he never forgot certain things even when she herself did. And he never dated anyone. "How was class?" she asked softly.
"We did word association today..." He put his head down on the counter and groaned, "Can you say...stupid?"
A grin tugged at her lips. "That brings back horrible high school memories."
"Oh yeah."
Without thinking about it, she reached out and gently stroked his hair with one hand. "So what was the word you started with?"
His face became pained, "Brother." He whispered.
"Hence the long day," she whispered back.
"Pretty much."
Chloe drew in a breath and let it out slowly. "You know, it's been awhile since..." She bit her lower lip.
Swallowing, Sam sat up and nodded, "Yeah..."
"After the boys go to bed...let's talk?" she asked softly, knowing it was something they both needed to do.
"Sounds good." Looking towards the other room, he could hear the soft giggling coming from it, "I should probably go get the boys cleaned up..."
"Dinner will be ready in about an hour," she told him.
"And it'll take me that long to convince them that it's a good thing to wash their hands."
Chloe chuckled. "Especially Michael."
He laughed slightly, "Yeah. He's so much like..." he trailed off, a lump forming in his throat at the thought of his brother.
"I know." She smiled faintly and looked at the floor.
"Have to keep an eye on him when he gets older. That's for sure."
Chloe inhaled sharply. "Yeah." She swallowed hard and moved over to the counter.
Standing up, Sam turned towards the front room, "I'll go watch the boys while you cook."
Nodding, she stared down at the spaghetti sauce as it blurred with her tears. Today it hurt so bad, even breathing was difficult.
* * *
Chloe sat on the sofa, her feet curled up beneath her as she took a small sip of the wine, staring intently at the glass. "They remind me so much of the two of you," she murmured.
Sam raised an eyebrow and took a drink of his own wine, "You think so?"
She nodded slightly. "Michael's just like Dean...and Matthew..." She smiled a little and looked over at him.
He shrugged, "I don't know, I think Matthew acts a lot like you."
"I don't hit you with my toy trains," she said lightly.
"Yeah, but you've hit me before." He joked.
"Playfully." She smiled.
"Like Matthew does with Michael."
Chloe's smile widened a little. "Even though it drives Michael crazy."
Sam smiled as well, "Yep."
She sipped her wine slowly, her eyes drifting shut for a moment. "Hey, Sam?" Her voice grew quieter.
"Yeah?"
"I really appreciate everything you do for us," she whispered.
He shrugged, "I love doing it."
"You never wish..." She bit her lower lip.
He cocked an eyebrow, "Wish what?"
"I don't know. For more?" Chloe slowly opened her eyes and gazed at him. *
"There's nothing more I could wish for." He said sincerely, gazing back at her.
She looked down for a moment. "If you did...that would be okay," she whispered.
He took her hand in his, "The only other thing I'd truly ever want...is...Dean back."
God, she understood that. Closing her eyes, she rested her head against his shoulder. "Me too."
Sam looked down at her, their faces inches apart, "Yeah..."
She felt his gaze on her face and she slowly opened her eyes to find him looking at her intently, his eyes filled with warmth. She swallowed hard, unable to look away.
He began to lean forward, slowly closing the gap between their lips.
The breath caught in her throat and she quickly pulled away. "I should...check on the boys," she whispered.
Putting his head down, he nodded slowly, "You should."
Guilt swept over her and she swallowed hard. "Goodnight, Sam." Her voice was faint.
"Night Chloe." He whispered, tracing his finger along the grooves in the table.
Biting her lower lip, she headed out of the room and down the hallway, leaning against the wall for a long moment, riddled with guilt. Because for a moment...she wondered what it would be like to kiss Sam.
* * *
Later that night, Michael woke with a start. Looking around with wide eyes, he pulled his blankets up close to him and rocked back and forth. Then, a voice came to him, telling him to go to his mom. Nodding, he got up and dragged his blanket and worn teddy bear with him out of bed and down to his mom's room, where he found her still awake and looking at a book. "Mommy?"
She was startled by the sound of her son's voice. "Hey, sweetie. What are you doing up?"
He sniffed a little, "I had a bad dream."
Her eyes softened even more. "Come here." She patted the bed beside her. "You can stay with me."
Holding his blanket and bear tighter to him, he climbed onto the bed and snuggled against her.
"What was your dream about?" Chloe asked softly, gently smoothing the air back from his face.
"I don't 'member."
She pressed a soft kiss to his forehead. "Well, you're safe here. Uncle Sam and I would never let anything bad happen to you or your brother."
Looking toward the night stand, Michael noticed the book that his mom had been looking at was still open, "Was you looking at Daddy?"
She was quiet for a moment, then she looked over at the book. "Yeah, I was," she admitted softly.
"Will you tell me a story?" He asked quietly.
Chloe glanced back at him. "About your dad?"
He nodded.
She smiled faintly and slid her arms around him, resting her chin on top of his head. "Let's see...your dad and I met in Smallville, Kansas, when I was about 18," she began.
"Then what?" He asked, eager for his mom to keep going.
Her eyes were warm with memories. "Well, I was working as a reporter at the Daily Planet and I was working on a story about a bad man. Your dad was working on the same case. We didn't like each other very much at first." She chuckled faintly. "But we wound up solving the case together, with each other's help. And then he asked me out for coffee and I said yes."
He looked up at her, "Did Daddy make it good coffee?"
"The best," she said solemnly.
Michael smiled widely, "Good, cause you should always get the bestest things."
Chloe kissed his nose. "Well I already have the bestest sons in the world."
"What happened after you drank the bestest coffee?" He asked, curiosity coming back to him.
"Well, after that, we wound up talking for hours and taking a walk in the country, gazing at the stars. Your dad was an amazing man," she whispered.
"Was he as 'mazing as you are?"
"Even more."
"That's good." He whispered back, snuggling closer to her.
She smiled sadly and kissed the top of his head. "Sweet dreams, Michael," she whispered.
Clutching his bear tight, he closed his eyes, "Love you Mommy."
"I love you too." She closed her eyes, unaware that Sam was standing in the doorway, gazing at them intently, his eyes sad.
Sam's heart felt heavy as he stood outside the door. It wasn't fair that Michael would never remember his dad. Not at all. As he'd listened to Chloe talk, Sam could tell that she longed for Dean to be there in that moment. Somehow, he knew that if Michael had had a nightmare while Dean was around, he would've known what to say. Sighing, he turned away and went back down to his room, wishing that now, more than ever, his brother was still alive.
Authors: X_tremeroswellian and Shadow_One
Disclaimer: Not ours. Don’t sue. Thanks.
Rating: R for language and violence.
Author’s Note: This story follows two others, the first titled, “Everything Will Be…” and the second, “Sweet Sacrifice.” If you haven’t read those, you’ll be lost with this one.
Author’s Note 2: The title was obviously inspired by the song “How to Save a Life” by the Fray.
Spoiler warnings: Up through and including “Freak” for Smallville and “Born Under a Bad Sign” for Supernatural.
One | Two | Three | Four | Five | Six | Seven | Eight |
How to Save a Life (Chapter One)
Five year old Michael growled when his brother yet again smacked him with another toy. Getting up, he began to walk away to find his mom, "Mom! Matt won't leave me alone!!"
Sighing softly, Chloe quickly wiped her tearful eyes with the back of her hand and stood up from where she'd been sitting at her desk. She flashed her oldest son a smile before kneeling down in front of him. "What's he doing?"
He pouted, "He keeps hitting me with his trains."
She winced inwardly, his expression so very remnant of his father's. She kissed his forehead and stood up, taking him by the hand and leading him down the hall to the boys' shared room. "Matthew Dean."
Matthew looked up innocently and dropped his toy, "What Mommy?"
If Michael was just like his father, Matthew was just like his uncle. Their interaction consistently reminded her of Dean and Sam Winchester back before everything terrible had happened. "You know you're not supposed to hit your brother."
He put his head down and his eyes watered, "I sorry Mommy."
"Come here, Matthew," she whispered, kneeling on the floor again.
Turning around, he scooted towards his mom and wrapped his arms around her.
Chloe smiled and hugged him back, kissing his cheek. "Be nice to your older brother, okay? He'll always be looking out for you," she whispered in his ear.
He nodded and kissed her cheek, "Okay."
She touched his face and turned to look at Michael, smiling at him again. "Come here, Michael."
Michael did as he was told and came over to her, sitting down beside her.
She wrapped an arm around each of them. "I'm the luckiest mom in the world," she whispered as if she was telling them a secret. "You know why?"
Both the boys looked at her with wide, wondering eyes, "Why Mommy?"
Her green eyes sparkled as she smiled at both of them. "Because I have the best sons in the world."
Wrapping his arms around his mom, Michael smiled, "You're the best Mommy."
She closed her eyes, hugging him back tightly, feeling the tears well up within her once more. She forced herself to take a deep breath and blink them away before either of them could see. "All right, who wants spaghetti for dinner?"
"I do! I do!" Came the excited cries.
Chloe grinned and stood up, taking them each by the hand. "All right, who's gonna set the table for Mommy while she cooks?"
Michael straightened up, "I will."
She gazed at him proudly. "Thank you very much." She smiled.
"You're welcome." Dragging a chair to the cupboard, he began to get plates out.
As his brother walked away, Matthew looked up at Chloe, "When's Uncle Sammy coming home?"
She paused in her tracks, looking down at her youngest son. "Soon, Sweetheart." She smiled faintly.
"Okay....can I help you cook Mommy?"
Chloe smiled. "Sure you can. You wanna grab me that big pot under the cabinet?"
Nodding, he walked over to the cabinet and dragged the pot out onto the floor, then tried to lift it up.
She stifled a grin and started to help him when Michael moved over to his side quickly, helping him pick up the pot. Tears welled in her eyes once more. "Thank you, boys," she whispered, taking the pot from them and setting it on the counter. She rested her hands on the countertop for a moment, shutting her eyes.
"Mommy, are you sad?" Came a quiet voice from behind.
She turned back to face them. "No, Michael, Mommy's not sad. I just have a little headache." She kissed the top of his head, and then the top of Matthew's head, as well. "How could I ever be sad with you two as my babies?"
Michael smiled, "I hope your headache goes away soon."
"I'm sure it will. Why don't you guys get your crayons and coloring books and make Mommy some new artwork for the fridge?" she suggested.
Matthew jumped at the chance and grabbed his brother's hand, and began to drag him away, "Come on!"
Chloe smiled as they headed out to the living room before closing her eyes and sighing softly. Even after four and a half years, some days were so hard to get through without Dean, it hurt. Tucking some hair behind her ear, she washed her hands before dragging out the ingredients for the spaghetti, casting a worried glance at the clock above the stove. Sam should have been home by now, but he wasn't.
And she was starting to grow worried.
That's when the door opened, and a sudden chorus of "Uncle Sam!" rang through the house.
Chloe relaxed instantly, her shoulders slumping with relief. It was approaching that day and she was more on edge than usual.
Walking into the room where Chloe was, Sam smiled, "Hey."
She turned and met his eyes, offering him a small smile. "Hey. Everything okay?"
"Yeah." He sat down on a bar stool and sighed, "Looong day."
Me too, she thought, nodding a little. "Hope you're hungry for spaghetti."
"Sounds great." He said. Frowning a little, he tilted his head, "Bad day?"
Chloe drew in a breath and let it out slowly. "Just a long one," she said softly, her back to him as she went to work, fixing their dinner for the night.
"One of those days where you miss him a lot?"
He knew her way too well. Both a blessing and a curse, depending on the day. She simply nodded wordlessly, knowing he was watching her intently.
"Yeah, same here." He whispered, putting his head down.
Tears prickled at her eyelids at his soft admission and slowly turned to look at him, her eyes sad. "You okay, Sam?"
He shook his head, "Not really."
She slowly moved over to where he was sitting, resting a hand on his shoulder silently.
The barstool creaked softly as he turned toward her and enveloped her in a hug.
Swallowing hard, she slowly wound her arms around him in return, squeezing her eyes shut and choking back a soft sob she felt building. She couldn't break down with the boys in the next room.
Sam rubbed her back and whispered words of comfort to her.
After a long moment, she slowly pulled away, offering him what she hoped was a halfway decent smile. "Thanks," she whispered.
"It's what I'm here for." He whispered back.
Chloe bit her lower lip, gazing at him intently. Over the past four years, the two of them had grown even closer than they had been. He was undoubtedly her best friend, the one person she trusted more than anyone else. And he was in love with her. He'd never directly said the words, but he didn't have to. He'd proven it so many times over the years in little ways. The way he looked after her and the boys, the way he never forgot certain things even when she herself did. And he never dated anyone. "How was class?" she asked softly.
"We did word association today..." He put his head down on the counter and groaned, "Can you say...stupid?"
A grin tugged at her lips. "That brings back horrible high school memories."
"Oh yeah."
Without thinking about it, she reached out and gently stroked his hair with one hand. "So what was the word you started with?"
His face became pained, "Brother." He whispered.
"Hence the long day," she whispered back.
"Pretty much."
Chloe drew in a breath and let it out slowly. "You know, it's been awhile since..." She bit her lower lip.
Swallowing, Sam sat up and nodded, "Yeah..."
"After the boys go to bed...let's talk?" she asked softly, knowing it was something they both needed to do.
"Sounds good." Looking towards the other room, he could hear the soft giggling coming from it, "I should probably go get the boys cleaned up..."
"Dinner will be ready in about an hour," she told him.
"And it'll take me that long to convince them that it's a good thing to wash their hands."
Chloe chuckled. "Especially Michael."
He laughed slightly, "Yeah. He's so much like..." he trailed off, a lump forming in his throat at the thought of his brother.
"I know." She smiled faintly and looked at the floor.
"Have to keep an eye on him when he gets older. That's for sure."
Chloe inhaled sharply. "Yeah." She swallowed hard and moved over to the counter.
Standing up, Sam turned towards the front room, "I'll go watch the boys while you cook."
Nodding, she stared down at the spaghetti sauce as it blurred with her tears. Today it hurt so bad, even breathing was difficult.
* * *
Chloe sat on the sofa, her feet curled up beneath her as she took a small sip of the wine, staring intently at the glass. "They remind me so much of the two of you," she murmured.
Sam raised an eyebrow and took a drink of his own wine, "You think so?"
She nodded slightly. "Michael's just like Dean...and Matthew..." She smiled a little and looked over at him.
He shrugged, "I don't know, I think Matthew acts a lot like you."
"I don't hit you with my toy trains," she said lightly.
"Yeah, but you've hit me before." He joked.
"Playfully." She smiled.
"Like Matthew does with Michael."
Chloe's smile widened a little. "Even though it drives Michael crazy."
Sam smiled as well, "Yep."
She sipped her wine slowly, her eyes drifting shut for a moment. "Hey, Sam?" Her voice grew quieter.
"Yeah?"
"I really appreciate everything you do for us," she whispered.
He shrugged, "I love doing it."
"You never wish..." She bit her lower lip.
He cocked an eyebrow, "Wish what?"
"I don't know. For more?" Chloe slowly opened her eyes and gazed at him. *
"There's nothing more I could wish for." He said sincerely, gazing back at her.
She looked down for a moment. "If you did...that would be okay," she whispered.
He took her hand in his, "The only other thing I'd truly ever want...is...Dean back."
God, she understood that. Closing her eyes, she rested her head against his shoulder. "Me too."
Sam looked down at her, their faces inches apart, "Yeah..."
She felt his gaze on her face and she slowly opened her eyes to find him looking at her intently, his eyes filled with warmth. She swallowed hard, unable to look away.
He began to lean forward, slowly closing the gap between their lips.
The breath caught in her throat and she quickly pulled away. "I should...check on the boys," she whispered.
Putting his head down, he nodded slowly, "You should."
Guilt swept over her and she swallowed hard. "Goodnight, Sam." Her voice was faint.
"Night Chloe." He whispered, tracing his finger along the grooves in the table.
Biting her lower lip, she headed out of the room and down the hallway, leaning against the wall for a long moment, riddled with guilt. Because for a moment...she wondered what it would be like to kiss Sam.
* * *
Later that night, Michael woke with a start. Looking around with wide eyes, he pulled his blankets up close to him and rocked back and forth. Then, a voice came to him, telling him to go to his mom. Nodding, he got up and dragged his blanket and worn teddy bear with him out of bed and down to his mom's room, where he found her still awake and looking at a book. "Mommy?"
She was startled by the sound of her son's voice. "Hey, sweetie. What are you doing up?"
He sniffed a little, "I had a bad dream."
Her eyes softened even more. "Come here." She patted the bed beside her. "You can stay with me."
Holding his blanket and bear tighter to him, he climbed onto the bed and snuggled against her.
"What was your dream about?" Chloe asked softly, gently smoothing the air back from his face.
"I don't 'member."
She pressed a soft kiss to his forehead. "Well, you're safe here. Uncle Sam and I would never let anything bad happen to you or your brother."
Looking toward the night stand, Michael noticed the book that his mom had been looking at was still open, "Was you looking at Daddy?"
She was quiet for a moment, then she looked over at the book. "Yeah, I was," she admitted softly.
"Will you tell me a story?" He asked quietly.
Chloe glanced back at him. "About your dad?"
He nodded.
She smiled faintly and slid her arms around him, resting her chin on top of his head. "Let's see...your dad and I met in Smallville, Kansas, when I was about 18," she began.
"Then what?" He asked, eager for his mom to keep going.
Her eyes were warm with memories. "Well, I was working as a reporter at the Daily Planet and I was working on a story about a bad man. Your dad was working on the same case. We didn't like each other very much at first." She chuckled faintly. "But we wound up solving the case together, with each other's help. And then he asked me out for coffee and I said yes."
He looked up at her, "Did Daddy make it good coffee?"
"The best," she said solemnly.
Michael smiled widely, "Good, cause you should always get the bestest things."
Chloe kissed his nose. "Well I already have the bestest sons in the world."
"What happened after you drank the bestest coffee?" He asked, curiosity coming back to him.
"Well, after that, we wound up talking for hours and taking a walk in the country, gazing at the stars. Your dad was an amazing man," she whispered.
"Was he as 'mazing as you are?"
"Even more."
"That's good." He whispered back, snuggling closer to her.
She smiled sadly and kissed the top of his head. "Sweet dreams, Michael," she whispered.
Clutching his bear tight, he closed his eyes, "Love you Mommy."
"I love you too." She closed her eyes, unaware that Sam was standing in the doorway, gazing at them intently, his eyes sad.
Sam's heart felt heavy as he stood outside the door. It wasn't fair that Michael would never remember his dad. Not at all. As he'd listened to Chloe talk, Sam could tell that she longed for Dean to be there in that moment. Somehow, he knew that if Michael had had a nightmare while Dean was around, he would've known what to say. Sighing, he turned away and went back down to his room, wishing that now, more than ever, his brother was still alive.