In Caelum Intramus 7
Title: In Caelum Intramus (We enter into Heaven) 7/
Author: Meg-chan (xme_chanx)
Pairing: Shou/Saga
Rating: NC-17
Genre: angst, yaoi
Warnings: sex, angst, mentions of self mutilation, anorexia, depression
Disclaimer: I do not own these boys, I wish I did. I do own the story and will use brute force if you steal it. No beta.
Summary: We were finally together, everything was perfect, and then I found out the truth. He hid so much from me, but I was ok with that if he’d stay with me, and promise me never to do it again.
X-Posted: My journal, aliceinloveland, SagaxShou
Chapter 7
Nao told me he’d be on his way quickly, and we’d take Shou to the hospital. He was going to call Tora and Hiroto for me, so I could focus on getting Shou and I ready to go. I packed us each a small bag, because I had no idea how long we would have to stay.
Shou was still being sick when Nao arrived. Nao and I grabbed some plastic bags and hauled Shou to the car. The drive to the hospital wasn’t long, and Nao parked while I took Shou in.
I signed him in and then a nurse took him off to get his vitals and the rest of the necessary stuff. Nao came in and sat next to me. He stared at me for a while, which kind of freaked me out.
“What are you doing, Nao-kun?” I finally asked.
“Ah, I’m just thinking, Saga-kun. I hope Shou-kun’s ok.” He said.
Shou came back looking tired and stressed.
“They’ll call us when there’s a room.” He practically fell into the seat next to me and fell asleep.
“Do you have any idea what’s wrong with him?” Nao asked. I shook my head.
“He was fine, until last night. He didn’t really do anything out of the ordinary, he didn’t eat anything bad. I don’t know.” I sighed and ran a hand through my hair.
After what felt like hours, a nurse came out and called Shou into a room. I tried to go but she stopped me.
“I’m his partner, I need to be with him!” I explained frantically. She started to nod but Shou spoke up.
“Sagacchi, go sit down with Nao.” I stared at him, to shocked to respond as the nurse led him away. I walked back to Nao, who gave me an odd look.
“Why didn’t you go?” He asked.
“He didn’t want me to.” I sighed.
Shou looked highly annoyed when I was finally allowed into the room.
“They said I’m dehydrated and put me on an I.V. drip. They took a lot of blood, and told me to wait patiently while they do some tests.” Shou frowned.
“I’m sorry, Shou-chan. Can I get you anything?” I asked. He shook his head.
“I’m not supposed to eat until they know what’s wrong. Besides, I doubt I’d keep it down anyway.” He wriggled around in the hospital bed, trying to get comfortable.
“Nao’s in the waiting room, should I go get him?” I asked. Shou nodded. I slipped out of the room and walked down the sterile hallway to the waiting room. Nao smiled at me.
“He wants to see you.”
“Ok. Tora and Hiroto said they’d come by later.”
I nodded at Nao and he followed me to Shou’s room. Shou was arguing with a nurse when we came back in.
“They have enough blood! I’m not giving you anymore!” He snapped.
“Kohara-san, they need more. Please, allow me to take one more sample.” The nurse pleaded.
“Shou-chan, please.” I asked. He glared at me, then nodded at the nurse.
She hurried out of the room after taking the sample. Shou had been trying his best to kill her with his stare.
After waiting even longer, the doctor came back with test results.
“Kohara-san, there was nothing wrong that showed up in our tests. However, if you don’t mind answering some questions, I have another theory as to what could be wrong with you.”
“Hai, sensei.” Shou answered.
“Have you been under more stress than usual lately, Kohara-san?” The doctor asked. Shou slowly nodded.
“Hai, a lot more.” He said softly. The doctor nodded.
“Sometimes, the connection of the mind and body is very strange. In some people, when they are stressed, their body takes on physical symptoms. I believe this could be what is occurring in your case, Kohara-san. I advise you to relax as best you can, and try to limit your activities and stress levels for a few days. If your symptoms don’t go away, I recommend you come back. Do you have any questions?” The doctor asked. Shou shook his head.
“No. Thank you, sensei.” Shou replied.
“You may go home after you’ve finished with the I.V. The nurse will be in shortly.” The doctor bowed and left.
Shou sighed and threw his arm over his face.
“Go get the others, Sagacchi. We need to talk.” Shou said, his voice was muffled by his arm.
“I’ll be right back, Shou-chan.” I kissed his cheek on the way out.
Shou
I can’t believe what the doctor said. I wanted it to be something I could take a pill for. I felt the tears running down my face, I wanted to scream. The cause of my affliction… A sob slipped out before I could stop it. I rubbed my face frantically, as the door opened.
“Hey Shou-tan!” Tora smiled at me. Hiroto, Nao, and Saga followed him in.
“What’s wrong with you, Shou-kun?” Nao asked, worry evident in his voice.
“It’s just stress. My stress just chooses to manifest itself in vomiting.” I managed a weak grin.
“What are you stressed about, Shou-kun?” Hiroto asked.
“Work, I-I think.” I stuttered. I saw Nao glare at Saga.
“Is that all Shou-kun?” Nao asked. I nodded, trying my best to silently beg Nao not to say anything. Anger flashed through his eyes, before he rounded on Saga.
“No! Nao, stop!” I screamed. Saga looked at me, confused.
“This is your fault!” Nao snapped. Saga looked at me helplessly.
“All I did was take care of him, Shou-chan, what’s wrong?” Saga said, still confused.
“You are! You don’t realize that it’s you killing him, Saga! If he wasn’t worried about you, he’d be fine.” Noa hissed. I was crying uncontrollably now, gripping Tora’s shoulder.
“Shou, what’s going on?” Tora asked.
“Nao, shut up!” I cried. Saga walked over to me, placing his hand on my cheek.
“Shou-chan, why are you worried about me?” he asked, his face full of hurt.
“Because you’re starving yourself, you stupid fuck.” Nao said bluntly. Tora and Hiroto looked extremely uncomfortable. Saga gaped at me.
“Shou-chan, how… Why did you? It’s my body… I…” Saga sputtered, his eyes filling with tears.
“Oh my god Saga, why would you do that?” Hiroto asked. Saga looked at him, his mouth opening and closing rapidly.
“I’m sorry, Shou.” Saga choked out. He ran from the room after that.
“I have to go get him!” I shouted and shoved Tora out of my way.
“Shou-kun, you’re still on an I.V., be rational.” Tora said, grabbing my shoulders.
“I have to get him! God, let me go, Tora!” I screamed. Tora pushed me back into the bed, and held me there, waiting for the nurse to put the sedative into my I.V. I sobbed loudly.
“Hiro-chan, go find Sagacchi. Take care of him until I come.” I gasped between sobs. Hiroto nodded and was out the door before anyone could stop him.
Tora and Nao kept trying to talk to me, tell me it was ok.
“It’s not ok. Sagacchi left. He left…” I closed my eyes tightly, tears sliding over my already soaked cheeks. I could feel the sedative, slowing me down and making my eyelids heavy.
“Saga…” I mumbled.
Hiroto
As if it wasn’t enough to find out one of your best friends is dealing with an eating disorder, having to chase down same friend sure puts the icing on the shit-cake. I figured Saga would be at his or Shou’s apartment. Since Shou’s was closer, I went there first.
There was nobody there, so I headed for Saga’s apartment. I knew he was there as soon as I arrived. The door wasn’t completely closed and I could hear him sobbing.
“Saga-kun?” I called. I heard moving, a nose blowing, and then Saga appeared in the hallway.
“Hiro-kun, I’m making him sick. I made him sick. He deserves so much better.” Saga whispered.
6 | 8
Notes:
Ok, I did this instead of responding to your comments. I’ll go do that now.
Enjoy.