Well, I was going to go back and delete a whole bunch of entries, but I've decided against it. I want to keep these entries. So many of them are red-ribbon reminders of what I DON'T want to be. And it's my history. I can't just throw it all away and start over. If I did that, I wouldn't have learned a thing. I can, however, start over and LEARN ( Read more... )

I've decided... I want to live my life in a way that, if someone set up secret hidden cameras around my house, I would not be ashamed to show it to everyone I know. Most especially my grandparents and Sam's parents. Some of my friends. Everyone, really. I mean, don't get me wrong, I'm not some crazy wild child that shoots up while masturbating and ( Read more... )

I don't know what to do.

"Borderline personality disorder (BPD) is defined within the fields of psychiatry, social work, and clinical psychology as a mental condition characterized primarily by emotional dysregulation, extreme "black and white" thinking, or "splitting" (believing that something is one of only two possible things, and ignoring any possible "in-betweens"), ( Read more... )

I just don't know what's going on anymore. I'm a mess. My self-esteem has plummeted. I'm insecure as fuck lately. I'm not even really confident anymore. I don't ever want to leave the house. I don't want to go to college. I don't want to get a job. I'M WEAK, OKAY? I'm just sick of everything. I don't want to eat. I don't want to shower. I don't ( Read more... )

So I haven't had internet. Christian's a douche. He decided to move out and go live with his girlfriend of three weeks. They're in LOOOOOVE. Bullshit. Sam and I think she's just looking for a babydaddy for her little girl. He met her on a delivery and as he was leaving, her MOM came outside and was like "my daughter likes you, here's her phone ( Read more... )

( Let the pictures begin. )

Ashlie Bubb currently has no internet because Christian is an idiot. So...Heather Pie saves the day [PS - Ashlie Bubb is wording this, not Heather Pie ( Read more... )

Well okay. Graduation is tomorrow. We've been fighting with my school since Friday about this shit and I'm so glad it's almost over. First, I couldn't get my cap and gown. Then they said they didn't have a cap and gown FOR me. They said they had no record of any such purchase and my gramma was in tears because she paid over two hundred dollars for ( Read more... )

Someone really loves me.
Sometimes I forget.