Okay.
I just don't know what's going on anymore. I'm a mess. My self-esteem has plummeted. I'm insecure as fuck lately. I'm not even really confident anymore. I don't ever want to leave the house. I don't want to go to college. I don't want to get a job. I'M WEAK, OKAY? I'm just sick of everything. I don't want to eat. I don't want to shower. I don't care if I smell. I fucking suck right now.
I freaked out on Sam today and now I feel bad. He was supposed to go to Blakes band practice and I started crying so he had to run back out and tell them he'd changed his mind. I don't even know why I got so upset. I have to go and meet my dad's side of the family tomorrow and I don't really want to go. I feel fat and I wish I would have had more notice so I could've lost a bit of weight beforehand. I need new clothes.
The only thing I'm really looking forward to is going to Disney with Julie. That shit better happen.
I freaked out on Sam today and now I feel bad. He was supposed to go to Blakes band practice and I started crying so he had to run back out and tell them he'd changed his mind. I don't even know why I got so upset. I have to go and meet my dad's side of the family tomorrow and I don't really want to go. I feel fat and I wish I would have had more notice so I could've lost a bit of weight beforehand. I need new clothes.
The only thing I'm really looking forward to is going to Disney with Julie. That shit better happen.