In which I bitch about my husband

[willsjoy]

So I was an hour later to work today than I wanted to be today, thanks to a minor fight with my husband. A lot of you don't know this, but I work for the State contractually, meaning I have no paid leave of any kind - no holiday, no vacation, no sick. Basically, if I don't work, I don't get paid, period. My husband, on the other hand, has a normal

Comments

[notodette]

It doesn't sound selfish. It sounds logical.

[celica18l]

((hugs)) I'm sorry you are dealing with this. It sucks being the only person who does anything around the house! I feel your pain!

[epiphany_of_luv]

I'm sorry...
It sounds like you're dealing with a lot! I hope you and your husband can work something out so you feel a little less of the pressure.

[baileywicked]

Men can be so frustrating- seriously

[desiresuicide]

YES, THIS. He should be the one making dinner, no excuses about not knowing how to cook or not liking it.

Erin, have you talked to him about all this? Maybe make a list of all the things you do? I think men tend to think they're pulling their weight when really they leave nearly everything to us, because they don't even know about half the shit we do.

[willsjoy]

Some nights he does start dinner. But some nights I've chosen something that I want to make or that he doesn't know how to make or that he started but now isn't sure if it's done, etc. I really do love to cook, and honestly, some of me having to do everything IS my fault, because I can be very controlling and want things done a certain way and he knows that, so sometimes he doesn't even try. We know we both need to work on that.

This morning he did apoligize and said he would work on being more flexible and complaining less, so that's good. I've never thought about making a list of everything I do. I imagine that would be quite a list! But I think you're right - he thinks he's pulling his weight around the house because there's so much that I just DO, without a thought, that he doesn't even realize I do.

[willsjoy]

Certain things, like cleaning the bathroom, I have stopped, thinking he would get fed up and clean it eventually. But nope. I was literally 8.5 months pregnant on my hands and knees scrubbbing our tub because it was filthy and I thought I might want to use it while in labor. Luckily, I carry really well, and cleaning like that wasn't hard, even very very pregnant.

Some nights he does start dinner. But some nights I've chosen something that I want to make or that he doesn't know how to make or that he started but now isn't sure if it's done, etc. I really do love to cook, and honestly, some of me having to do everything IS my fault, because I can be very controlling and want things done a certain way and he knows that, so sometimes he doesn't even try. We know we both need to work on that.

This morning he did apoligize and said he would work on being more flexible and complaining less, so that's good.