Bruises and Beard Burn- Why Mike is a Tortured Soul
Title: Bruises and Beard Burn- Why Mike is a Tortured Soul
Pairing: Erik Friberg/Roger Levesque
Word Count: 1135
Rating: R
Disclaimer: Only real in my mind ;-;
Summary: “You guys are kind of loud when you’re… you know… going at it, and it keeps Taylor and I up at night sometimes.”
“You can hear us when we…?”
“Yeah.”
“Oh.”
A/N: This is a crack!fic that occurred after a few drinks too many ^^; And if you need a refresher on who these two are, it can be found here
All the thanks in the world to albion_lass who is amazing and the best cheerleader and beta when it comes to this pairing! Thank you so much Cassie for ~inspiring me<3
“How’d you get this one?”
“Mmmmm… Jeff I think?”
“Who gave you this one?”
“Zach, when he was holding me.”
“… I’m going to have a talk with them about-”
“They’re defenders. That’s what they do.”
“They’re not allowed to bruise you when-”
Erik shuts Roger up with a kiss.
“You know, I love that you and Roger are together and everything, but uh… could you keep it down?”
“…. What?”
“You guys are kind of loud when you’re… you know… going at it, and it keeps Taylor and I up at night sometimes.”
“You can hear us when we…?”
“Yeah.”
“Oh.”
Erik is bright red for ten minutes after Mike leaves.
“Why are you whispering?”
“Because Mike told me that he and Taylor can hear us and that we keep them up at night.”
“I know.”
“… Why didn’t you tell me?”
“Because I like the noises that you make.”
Roger thinks it’s cute that he can still make Erik blush.
“What are you doing with that broom?”
“I want them to stop. I don’t know how the fuck it can sound like there are 20 people in there fucking, but I don’t want to hear it any more.”
“You’re going to need to stand on a chair…”
“… thank you, I noticed. OI! THE TWO OF YOU!!! SHUT UP!!! I DON’T WANT TO HEAR YOU FUCKING!!!!”
Taylor watches with horrified amusement as Mike stands on the chair and bangs the broom handle into the ceiling.
“How long do we have to do this?”
“Until Mike starts to cry.”
Roger and Erik resume jumping on the bed as a loud porno plays in the background.
“People are going to start wondering why I have bruises in places I can’t get kicked.”
“You could have gotten elbowed.”
“On multiple places on my neck and shoulders?”
Roger just grins as he continues to suck and bite Erik’s pale skin as Erik writhes beneath him.
“Oh man, are those from practice?”
“Huh?”
“Your bruises. I didn’t realize we went so hard on you.”
“Oh uh… yeah… I... uh… bruise easily.”
“Jesus, how did you get the ones on your neck? Did someone elbow you on your neck? How did you get so many… oh…”
James twitches as Roger walks by and winks at Erik.
“Ouch! What the hell was that for?”
“For bruising me where people can see.”
“You bit me!”
“You bite me all the time.”
“Do you want to suck my blood?”
“What am I Dracula now?”
“You’re pasty. Like a vampire. Can I call you Edward? Can we put some sparkles on you? Will you call me Jacob? ”
“OKAY I DRAW THE LINE WITH TWILIGHT ROLE PLAY!!! SHUT THE FUCK UP BEFORE I STAKE YOU TWO THROUGH THE HEART!!!”
Erik is too busy showing Roger what type of sucking he’s excellent at to pay any attention to Mike’s agitated scream.
“What are you doing?”
“Um… nothing?”
“Liar! I saw you.”
“Well you don’t have to be so smug about it.”
“Smug? Has Mike been teaching you new words with his fancy education?”
“You’re a jerk.”
“You’re avoiding answering me.”
“… I like this one- the colors in it. It hurts when I press it but um… it feels nice.”
Roger’s eyes are dark as he falls to his knees and presses his lips and teeth against the bruise on Erik’s hip, drawing all sorts of noises from him.
“Maybe we should start going to my place. Mike has been kind of a dick lately- I think he isn’t sleeping well.”
“You don’t like my place?”
“Well… it’s nice, but my place is just… well Mike and Taylor won’t have to listen to us at my place because it’s just me. And hopefully you? I was kind of hoping it could be… our place?”
“Are you asking me to move in with you?”
“Umm… yes? I mean, you don’t have to if you don’t want to, if you think it’s too soon, but I thought that since, well we’re always together anyway and you already have roommates that maybe it would be better for all of us, and I’d like for us to… but you don’t have to if you don’t want to and-”
“Erik.”
“- and you can have your own room if you want since I have two and-”
“Erik, I would love to move in with you.”
The smile on Erik’s face is blinding as Roger interlaces their fingers, leans forward, and kisses him.
“You look sad; I thought you’d be happy. You don’t have to listen to our sex life anymore.”
“Well, that is a plus.”
“And you’ll have more room.”
“True.”
“But if you ever need cuddles, Erik and I are here to provide them.”
“… I don’t need cuddles.”
“It’s okay Mike, everyone needs cuddles now and again.”
“… I don’t need cuddles.”
For someone who doesn’t need cuddles, Mike holds on for a good minute when Roger hugs him after they’re done moving his stuff out.
“Mmmmmmm.”
“You sound like a cat.”
“What time is it?”
“Early, we don’t have to be up for a few more hours.”
“Good. Keep doing that.”
Roger smiles, pulling back Erik’s hair as he continues to place gentle, soft kisses on the pale skin of Erik’s neck.
“What are you looking for?”
“My wristbands. I think Roger forgot to put them back in after he did laundry.”
“… Roger does your laundry?”
“It was his turn this week. But where is it?”
“Dude, it’s not like you need it. Your wrist could use a little sunshi- what the fuck?”
“...”
“How did you get that bruise? Are those teeth marks?”
“…”
“… Do I want to know?”
“No.”
“Does he like to tie you down or something? Or do you like to be tied up?”
Roger walks by and tosses Erik a wristband with a wink as Brad doubles over laughing; Erik flushes red.
“Dude, what happened to your face?”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“… Your beard and mustache are gone. You’ve only lived with Erik for a week and he already made you shave? You’re whipped.”
“Oh! No, he was just complaining about beard burn.”
“… I’m not sure I want to-”
“You know, chafes his legs and his man region and it gets uncomfortable to run because of it-”
“Stop talking.”
“- and we’re really into blow jobs because it’s easier and-”
“For the love of God, stop talking!!!!”
“-I really like the noises that he makes and now that we don’t live with you we can be as loud as we want.”
“Why do you torture me like this?”
Roger grins as he throws his arms around his best friend- it’s nice to know he can still make Mike’s life hell without living with him.
Pairing: Erik Friberg/Roger Levesque
Word Count: 1135
Rating: R
Disclaimer: Only real in my mind ;-;
Summary: “You guys are kind of loud when you’re… you know… going at it, and it keeps Taylor and I up at night sometimes.”
“You can hear us when we…?”
“Yeah.”
“Oh.”
A/N: This is a crack!fic that occurred after a few drinks too many ^^; And if you need a refresher on who these two are, it can be found here
All the thanks in the world to albion_lass who is amazing and the best cheerleader and beta when it comes to this pairing! Thank you so much Cassie for ~inspiring me<3
“How’d you get this one?”
“Mmmmm… Jeff I think?”
“Who gave you this one?”
“Zach, when he was holding me.”
“… I’m going to have a talk with them about-”
“They’re defenders. That’s what they do.”
“They’re not allowed to bruise you when-”
Erik shuts Roger up with a kiss.
“You know, I love that you and Roger are together and everything, but uh… could you keep it down?”
“…. What?”
“You guys are kind of loud when you’re… you know… going at it, and it keeps Taylor and I up at night sometimes.”
“You can hear us when we…?”
“Yeah.”
“Oh.”
Erik is bright red for ten minutes after Mike leaves.
“Why are you whispering?”
“Because Mike told me that he and Taylor can hear us and that we keep them up at night.”
“I know.”
“… Why didn’t you tell me?”
“Because I like the noises that you make.”
Roger thinks it’s cute that he can still make Erik blush.
“What are you doing with that broom?”
“I want them to stop. I don’t know how the fuck it can sound like there are 20 people in there fucking, but I don’t want to hear it any more.”
“You’re going to need to stand on a chair…”
“… thank you, I noticed. OI! THE TWO OF YOU!!! SHUT UP!!! I DON’T WANT TO HEAR YOU FUCKING!!!!”
Taylor watches with horrified amusement as Mike stands on the chair and bangs the broom handle into the ceiling.
“How long do we have to do this?”
“Until Mike starts to cry.”
Roger and Erik resume jumping on the bed as a loud porno plays in the background.
“People are going to start wondering why I have bruises in places I can’t get kicked.”
“You could have gotten elbowed.”
“On multiple places on my neck and shoulders?”
Roger just grins as he continues to suck and bite Erik’s pale skin as Erik writhes beneath him.
“Oh man, are those from practice?”
“Huh?”
“Your bruises. I didn’t realize we went so hard on you.”
“Oh uh… yeah… I... uh… bruise easily.”
“Jesus, how did you get the ones on your neck? Did someone elbow you on your neck? How did you get so many… oh…”
James twitches as Roger walks by and winks at Erik.
“Ouch! What the hell was that for?”
“For bruising me where people can see.”
“You bit me!”
“You bite me all the time.”
“Do you want to suck my blood?”
“What am I Dracula now?”
“You’re pasty. Like a vampire. Can I call you Edward? Can we put some sparkles on you? Will you call me Jacob? ”
“OKAY I DRAW THE LINE WITH TWILIGHT ROLE PLAY!!! SHUT THE FUCK UP BEFORE I STAKE YOU TWO THROUGH THE HEART!!!”
Erik is too busy showing Roger what type of sucking he’s excellent at to pay any attention to Mike’s agitated scream.
“What are you doing?”
“Um… nothing?”
“Liar! I saw you.”
“Well you don’t have to be so smug about it.”
“Smug? Has Mike been teaching you new words with his fancy education?”
“You’re a jerk.”
“You’re avoiding answering me.”
“… I like this one- the colors in it. It hurts when I press it but um… it feels nice.”
Roger’s eyes are dark as he falls to his knees and presses his lips and teeth against the bruise on Erik’s hip, drawing all sorts of noises from him.
“Maybe we should start going to my place. Mike has been kind of a dick lately- I think he isn’t sleeping well.”
“You don’t like my place?”
“Well… it’s nice, but my place is just… well Mike and Taylor won’t have to listen to us at my place because it’s just me. And hopefully you? I was kind of hoping it could be… our place?”
“Are you asking me to move in with you?”
“Umm… yes? I mean, you don’t have to if you don’t want to, if you think it’s too soon, but I thought that since, well we’re always together anyway and you already have roommates that maybe it would be better for all of us, and I’d like for us to… but you don’t have to if you don’t want to and-”
“Erik.”
“- and you can have your own room if you want since I have two and-”
“Erik, I would love to move in with you.”
The smile on Erik’s face is blinding as Roger interlaces their fingers, leans forward, and kisses him.
“You look sad; I thought you’d be happy. You don’t have to listen to our sex life anymore.”
“Well, that is a plus.”
“And you’ll have more room.”
“True.”
“But if you ever need cuddles, Erik and I are here to provide them.”
“… I don’t need cuddles.”
“It’s okay Mike, everyone needs cuddles now and again.”
“… I don’t need cuddles.”
For someone who doesn’t need cuddles, Mike holds on for a good minute when Roger hugs him after they’re done moving his stuff out.
“Mmmmmmm.”
“You sound like a cat.”
“What time is it?”
“Early, we don’t have to be up for a few more hours.”
“Good. Keep doing that.”
Roger smiles, pulling back Erik’s hair as he continues to place gentle, soft kisses on the pale skin of Erik’s neck.
“What are you looking for?”
“My wristbands. I think Roger forgot to put them back in after he did laundry.”
“… Roger does your laundry?”
“It was his turn this week. But where is it?”
“Dude, it’s not like you need it. Your wrist could use a little sunshi- what the fuck?”
“...”
“How did you get that bruise? Are those teeth marks?”
“…”
“… Do I want to know?”
“No.”
“Does he like to tie you down or something? Or do you like to be tied up?”
Roger walks by and tosses Erik a wristband with a wink as Brad doubles over laughing; Erik flushes red.
“Dude, what happened to your face?”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“… Your beard and mustache are gone. You’ve only lived with Erik for a week and he already made you shave? You’re whipped.”
“Oh! No, he was just complaining about beard burn.”
“… I’m not sure I want to-”
“You know, chafes his legs and his man region and it gets uncomfortable to run because of it-”
“Stop talking.”
“- and we’re really into blow jobs because it’s easier and-”
“For the love of God, stop talking!!!!”
“-I really like the noises that he makes and now that we don’t live with you we can be as loud as we want.”
“Why do you torture me like this?”
Roger grins as he throws his arms around his best friend- it’s nice to know he can still make Mike’s life hell without living with him.