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[schexyschteve]

Who gets invited to the bridal shower?

My fiance's mom is planning the bridal shower. The place it's being held at can hold 50 people. The thing that's irritating me is that she keeps adding all these people from FH's side of the family that HAVE to be invited. Like an aunt's sister or something, just because "that's what you do." I don't even know

Comments

[lady_borg]

1.
"Not unless we know them well.
We have worked really hard to create a small, intimate celebration featuring all of our most important people. If you have a question about this please call or email. Thanks for understanding."

Legally stolen from Offbeat bride, and it doesnt matter if they are in a relationship, if I don't know them and/or may partner doesnt know they are not invited,

2. I only sent invites to either immediate family or family I have never had an issue with in the past.

[lalanav]

if I don't know them and/or may partner doesnt know they are not invited,

Does this also apply to engaged people? What if you have far-away friends who are engaged, but you haven't been able to meet their fiance/e because that friend lives very far away and it hasn't been possible (financially, time/job-wise, etc) to meet them?

[lady_borg]

I have no far away friends, everyone who is coming ives in the same city as I, and it also depends, if this person is so important to my friend and my friend is so important to me then why don't I know them yet? why have I not been introduced. I make it important to meet all my friend's partners, the only ones I dont know well are the ones I don't like.
None of my friends are engaged anyway. We are the only one getting married and we have no friends who are married.

[hippie_mamabear]

Guest lists get out of control really easily. Set your parameters very early on. A good rule of thumb: if they're not really important to YOU, don't worry about hurting their feelings! It's not like you'll have many occasions to feel bad about it in person ;) Your relatives' guest lists needn't become yours.

[schexyschteve]

I will try to keep this in mind. I just feel like it's hard to go back now that we're so close and I've kind of let stuff slide as it is.

[winterbymorning]

Our rule for +1s was the guest in question had to have been dating the +1 for at least a year, so no +1s for single guests. But everybody on our guest list knew somebody else who would be at the wedding. If you have any guests who don't know anyone else there, I would consider giving them a +1 if you have the budget for it, because they might feel awkward otherwise.

[schexyschteve]

That's kind of what we're leaning towards (except maybe 6 months instead of a year).

[oh_muffy]

My sister//MOH is in charge of the bridal shower & she is inviting all female relatives in each side, all females invited to the wedding that are in the immediate area to a 3hr drive away, plus all my girlfriends I want at the bachelorette party, because that is in the evening after the bridal shower.

The only singles we have are in a group of about 12 guy friends from HS that my husband invited & he asked them if they'd like a guest or not; only 3 said they would so the other 9 will just be stag.

We are sending invites to ladies like my Mom's great aunts & my Grandma's cousins who are still with us. It's out of respect because our family is very small & close, so for us it's the right thing to do. I doubt they will come to the reception, but I'm sure they'll come to the wedding & I know it will make my Grandma happy & proud to have them there.

[nerdlywed]

1) If they were dating, we invited them. A few weeks before the wedding we had some wiggle room so we let all our single guests know they could bring someone if they wanted - I don't think anyone took us up on it.

2) I invited them, but I was certain they wouldn't come (and they didn't). Anyone who was questionable I counted in the guest tally until they gave me a specific "No."