is a total train wreck.  I'm so all over the place, with everything.  I don't know what to do anymore.

April 2 can't get here fast enough.  I can't wait to get away.  Even if it will only be for four days.  It'll be nice to have warm weather & relax with my momma. :)

So, in a drunken & very stupid move, I finally talked to Dave about what went wrong & why he stopped talking to me.  I texted him and asked him to answer my question as to why.  His answer? He's really weird & just gets bored easily ( Read more... )

One of my brother, Tony's best friends was just found dead in his house yesterday.  It's so sad.  Him & Tony were friends from when I was just a little girl & Mike aka Chop, lived across the street from us.  He was devastated when Tony died.  My brother, Dave just saw Chop a couple of weeks ago, they got to talking about Tony & Chop was a mess, ( Read more... )

After finally reading, He's Just Not That Into You, a book I needed to read two years ago when I met Nick, I've come to a conclusion.  No guy has ever been THAT into me.   Not even remotely.  So after concluding this, I've decided I'm giving up on men entirely.  Which wasn't the point of the book, obviously.  But, hey a girl can only handle so much ( Read more... )

What a difference less than a month makes.  I have no idea where things went wrong or wtf I did, but Dave kinda just fell off the face of the earth.  Things were really good, then out of nowhere, I just kinda stopped hearing from him.  & whenever he did text me it was like he was uninterested & didn't really wanna talk.  It wasn't the usual ( Read more... )

I've been working way too much & I never get a chance to sleep.  Today is my first day off in a while, & I've been up since 6:30.  This sucks.  Might as well update this stupid thing since I don't think I'll be falling back asleep at all ( Read more... )

It makes me absolutely sick that I go to work & whatever money I make tends to get stolen by my junkie brother & injected into his arms.  It's fucking ridiculous that I can't "hide" my money in my drawer and expect it to be there in the morning ( Read more... )

Tomorrow is five years since my brother died & I still can't believe he's gone.  In so many ways it feels like he was never here, yet it feels like he just left.

I really hate this time of year & I hate thinking about this.  Mostly, I just hate that he's gone & I seriously can tell Anthony is going to be so fucked up from all of this. Fucking

This has been one of the longest ten days or so of my life.  But, I've had a lot of fun ( Read more... )

Oooooh, life ( Read more... )