[chicago fire] fic | What I Got Wrong

[waltzmatildah]

Title | What I Got Wrong
Fandom | Chicago Fire
Characters | Kelly Severide + Leslie Shay
Word Count | 1000
Rating | MA [language]
Summary | An AU for immediately following the fight between Kelly and Leslie in episode 1x10
Author’s Note | This is for citron_presse for her prompt what if you should decide, that you don’t want me there by your side… for the chicagofire_tv

Comments

[citron_presse]

OMFG

[waltzmatildah]

Firstly, I AM SO GLAD THAT YOUR FIRST RESPONSE WAS THAT YOU LOVED IT! I was a little worried about the style working but I figured (following a conversation with Catteo) that considering I (and LOTS of other people) freaking loved it in the book I referenced, there was a chance it could work in fanfic too?

So, on to your ETA. Your point that the format was incredible allays all my above fears. WOOOT AND MORE PHEW!

pared down, no padding, That's exactly what I wanted. Raw and sparse.

because I have to use his last name at least once every time I write about him I must admit that I did enjoy getting to use the name quite a few times in this fic! HEEEEEE!

I like this so much better than the episode. It's bleaker. To many people it would probably sound weird for me to say that I FREAKING LOVE that you thought this was bleak, but I think you know me well enough by now to know that bleak is where I LIVE! Haha! So, yes, that was EXACTLY what I wanted to do with this. And you're exactly right re. the episode. I think that's partly why catteo

[catteo]

I have to go back to work but know that I am A-FLAIL LIKE A FLAILING THING FULL OF FLAIL. And will be back to talk some actual sense to you later.

[waltzmatildah]

Back to work? THAT IS THE RUDEST THING I HAVE HEARD ALL DAY!

Also, you should know that I'm having a 'situation'. A My So-Called Life situation. I blame Ash. For obvious reasons! SHE IS THE WORST KIND OF ENABLER!

Come back to meeeee. Stat.

[catteo]

Having been back to work I am now back at home, but you are correct, it was totally rude. I have cheese and quince paste and pinot noir grapes to console me though. Yes, that's right, Tasmania the redux. I didn't get a camera this morning after all - thought I'd save that for the weekend!

OMG My So Called Life was a DEFINING SHOW for me growing up. Angela being the misfit in love with the Cool Guy AKA Boy From The Wrong Side of the Tracks AKA MR HOT HIMSELF. And Rayanne and Rickie being the best BFFs and Brian with his pining and NOW I WANT TO WATCH IT TOO (although I do have the boxset so probs not that hard!).

I am going to have dinner and re-read your fic about another hundred times and then I will be back to comment appropriately.

[waltzmatildah]

I can't quite believe that I've never watched this show before. Though, in my defence, I didn't really watch television at all besides Buffy until Grey's came along. And, in hindsight, it does mean that there is a plethora of fabulous things out there for me discover!!

But, OMG Cat! How have I survived until now?? I mean, it's Claire and freaking Jared!!!! Claire AND Jared!

Lord.

My life is done.

D.O.N.E.

[catteo]

Right, so, coherent commenting time. I LOVE THIS SO MUCH!

I think that the style works perfectly for this sort of thing - it really enhances the way that I think Severide's thinking would be - all over the place, disjointed and introspective. You've basically nailed it and I want to read this sort of style forever. Whatever would we do without Don?! But really, you've done fabulously with it. I really liked the screenplay paragraph! (If you want to AO3 it then email me and I'll do my best to talk you through it - I may need help with the other bits of formatting!).

I ADORE how raw and unapologetic this is. Severide knows that he's falling apart, but he also knows that he's trying to be better. I really liked the last paragraph where you kind of tie it all together and make it seem as though just the mere fact of Shay being back is going to make it better. And the way that he acknowledges that he really needs her is glorious. This is really the best kind of gen/BFF fic - angsty and full of feels

[citron_presse]

And the good person vs. A Good Person made me want to weep for him. Because he really is a good person, he just doesn't know how to be. And the prose somehow makes that so clear without being obvious about it.

Oh, THIS! I forgot - maybe fortunately, because catteo said it beautifully, and I can just steal her words!

[waltzmatildah]

I've stolen her words on several occasions! They're very good words :)

[waltzmatildah]

HELLO!

How is your day going? I hope that you have had time to watch the newest episode. citron_presse and I have already engaged in a D&M about it, and we could really use your input!

In other news, THANK YOU FOR YOUR LOVELY COMMENT! Whatever would we do without Don?! INDEED, INDEED!!! Thank you to Don, also!!

And the prose somehow makes that so clear without being obvious about it. Yay! And I think that's the way this kind of format has to be used to make it work, so I'm SO GLAD for this comment! :)

THANK YOU THANK YOU!

[drzlilsuga]

UM WOW?!!? I feel super dazed by your marvelousness.

HOW DO YOU EXIST MY DEAR? HOWWWW!?!?!?!??????????????!!!!!!!!!!!

[waltzmatildah]

ARGH! GIF LOVE!! I THINK I JUST LOST WHOLE MINUTES OF MY DAY WITH THE STARING!

THESE TWOOOOOOO!

GAH!

Also, THANK YOU! I'm glad you liked it! I know it's a little 'different', so I'm so pleased you three think it worked. PHEW AND YAY!

♥

[also, beautiful Gabby icon is beautiful!]