TITLE: ALL SHOOK UP...part 3
TITLE: ALL SHOOK UP
AUTHOR: VNapier
PAIRING: Ennis/Jack
RATING: R - NC17
FEEDBACK: Always. E mail me at BBMFAN@ZOOMINTERNET.NET
DISCLAIMERS: Standard disclaimers. The characters are not mine, but the story is.
SUMMARY: This is a sequel to 'If Anyone Can Show Just Cause, Speak Now...' and 'Til Death Do Us Part'. Those stories can be found on my
livejournal at http://vln-bbmfan.livejournal.com/
part 1 - http://vln-bbmfan.livejournal.com/23041.html
part 2 - http://vln-bbmfan.livejournal.com/23455.html
Hell.
That was the only way Ennis could have described the week he had just endured. The wintry weather had ceased to be an issue, the round up preparations were complete, fences had been mended, water holes checked, and the grazing was as good as it had been in years. Even Jack's fucking truck hadn't sputtered or backfired the whole fucking time; there was absolutely nothing to occupy his increasingly frazzled mind. He ate, he slept, he worked, and then he went to his room and worried.
By Saturday he was so wound up he didn't even bother going by the market to do any shopping. He couldn't face the Fleishman's. If Jack had called, they would have gotten word to him. Jack hadn't called, but he couldn't stand the thought of hearing those words spoke out loud.
The only bright spot was the hour or so every evening he spent with Rich. The old man was looking better, or maybe Ennis just hoped it was so. Sometimes they talked about Sage, and the way things were before Ennis' daddy killed Earl. They never directly talked about Earl, though, or Ennis' father, which suited Ennis just fine.
The rest of the time they played poker, using beer caps for chips, or just sat and watched the television. It was safe to do so until the eleven o'clock news came on, and by then, the television was long since turned off. Ennis didn't want to hear anything else that didn't come first hand from Jack, himself.
On Sunday, he was torn between dread and anticipation. If Jack was able to call, he would do it that afternoon. The problem was that Ennis wasn't sure he could walk away if that phone didn't ring, not without ripping it off the wall, first. However, those thoughts were lost in the confusion when he reached the Fleishman's house and was practically pulled from his truck by an exuberant Elmer.
"Ennis, come over here. I'd like you to meet my youngest boy, Bert."
Ennis shook a younger version of Elmer's hand. It was uncanny, how much father and son looked alike, only Bert still had a full head of wavy brown hair, where Elmer's was gray and missing on top. It was hard to think of this man as a 'youngest boy', considering he was over a handful of years older than Ennis.
"Come on inside and meet Gwen, Bert's wife, and her," Elmer flinched and gave his son an apologetic smile. "And *their* daughter, Lindsey."
*** *** *** ***
Ennis inhaled deeply. It had officially been Spring for two weeks, but the night air still carried a chill once the sun settled behind the Big Horns. From inside he could hear laughter, but it only made him feel more alone.
He had tried to excuse himself as soon as the introductions were over, but Thelma would have none of it. Elmer, either, but it was Thelma's pleading look that he could not ignore. From what he could tell, Bert's wife was a real nice lady, and Ennis was glad that Elmer seemed to have gotten over any reservations he had about her, but he could tell that Thelma had been extremely hurt by the news that her son had gotten married without his parents being there.
It was for Thelma's sake that Ennis had found the courage to stick around, but as the day wore on, he found himself genuinely liking both Bert and Gwendolyn Fleishman. The news that Bert had officially adopted Gwen's little girl, Lindsey, had been shocking, too, but didn't seem nearly as hurtful as the secret wedding.
Lindsey, who had her mother's green eyes and a lighter shade of blonde hair, would be turning six on Wednesday. Bert and Gwen both swore that she was usually much more rambunctious and outgoing, but she quietly clung to her mother's side for most of the evening and all through dinner. They had been on the road since five that morning, and after two full days of driving, the little girl was worn out.
Lindsey's quiet demeanor reminded Ennis of Glen, and how he had been back on that fateful day in Casper. The boy had come out of his shell, just like Delilah said, something Ennis had witnessed first hand as Glen played with the gaggle of kids at his birthday party a week ago.
Ennis had been reluctant to go, but something deep inside was more persistent, and he went, just to get his insides straightened out. Delilah had welcomed him with a weary, but genuine smile. C.C.'s welcome had been more boisterous, and Ennis worried that the foreman was still hoping for a romance between his sister and Ennis. Glen had been thrilled to see him, and truth be told, Ennis had found comfort in seeing the little boy bouncing around so happy. By the time he left, he was actually proud that he had gone. It was a new feeling, and one that he selfishly hoped to experience again.
While he was still a little wary of Delilah, he couldn't help but respect her for having the courage to save her son from the man she had mistakenly chosen for a husband. A comment or two made over dinner led him to believe that Bert's wife might have been doing right by her child, too, when she saddled herself with the stigma that came with being a divorcee. Both women made him all the more resentful of the mother who had not done a damn thing to save Jack.
"Mind if I join you?"
Ennis was startled to look up and see Bert's wife step out onto the patio and pull the sliding glass doors closed.
"Ma'am."
"I just wanted to thank you."
"What fer?"
"For talking to Bert's father." She looked up at Ennis, her green eyes sparkling in the dim light of the quarter moon. "Bert has been so jealous of you."
Ennis' stomach sank. "Why?"
"Every time he called here, you were all his parents could talk about. You and your friend, Jack. He said it was just like them to want to help out, but he felt...I don't know, like he was being replaced. I think that's why he finally got the nerve to tell his father about us dating. It was hard on him when his father reacted so badly."
"Didn't mean no harm. Jus' bein' a friend."
Gwen moved closer and leaned against the porch support, her arms crossed across her chest under her husband's coat that was draped over her shoulders. "Bert knows that now. He knew it then, too, but it was hard, thinking that his parents had found someone else to love and to take care of. It really helped, finding out that you were the one who got his father to give me a chance."
Ennis tensed. How much did she know? She knew about Jack, knew his name. What if-
"Bert worries about them, up here all by themselves. He's tried to get them to sell out and move to Alabama, but they like it up here." She took a deep breath. "I can see why, too. It's beautiful country." Then returned to her original thought, "Now Bert's just grateful to know they have such a good friend."
She cocked her head and smiled at him. "I hope you don't mind me saying so, but you are an exceptional young man. Most men your age wouldn't be bothered with spending time visiting an older couple."
The Fleishmans were good people. It wasn't any effort to be good to them, and especially not when they had been so much better to him. He didn't have the words to say anything like that, though. A small breeze blew the smoke from his cigarette in her direction. Quickly, he snuffed the fire out of the tip, and glanced over in surprise when Gwen laughed.
"You don't have to put that out on my account. I'm used to Bert's cigars." She glanced over her shoulder and into the house through the picture window. "I'm actually surprised that he isn't out here, too."
As if on cue, the patio door slid open and Bert and Elmer filed out. Gwen's face lit up and she ended up in an embrace that made Ennis turn away in frustrated envy. Elmer's understanding hand on his shoulder only helped a little.
"I'll leave you men to your smoking," Gwen said, leaving Bert his coat and hurrying off into the warm interior of the house.
"I'm afraid I've gotten soft since moving to Alabama," Bert laughed as he shivered, even in his coat. "I don't remember it being this cold when I lived here."
"Some folks jus' don't take too well ta bein' cold," Ennis mumbled.
Elmer's hand tightened on Ennis' shoulder. "Jack was always complaining about the cold," Elmer explained to his son.
"And he's in Alaska?" Bert's voice was laced with incredulous sympathy. "Dad tells me you haven't heard anything in a while."
Breathing got difficult and Ennis suddenly wanted nothing more than to be gone from there, away from those who could be what he and Jack never could, away from those who didn't have the slightest clue how fucking cold it was in Wyoming. It could be a hundred and twelve, and that bed back in that damn motel would still be ice cold.
"Ennis," Gwen called from the door. "Telephone."
Jack! Everyone and everything else was forgotten. For a week Ennis had been battling his own fears while trying to ignore the words of those around him, but the one thing he had not been able to erase was that fleeting image of a stretch of pavement, twisted and split right down the middle. Pictures didn't lie.
"It's Jack," Thelma handed Ennis the receiver with a tearful smile.
"Bud?" he asked hesitantly into the plastic mouthpiece.
"Damn, Cowboy. You got no idea how good it is ta hear yer voice."
"Reckon I do," Ennis choked out. "Been seein'...hearin'..."
"It's real crazy up here. Ain't never seen nothin' like it. One big fuckin' pile a mess."
"But yer...yer okay, right?" Fear and worry would not be contained any longer. "Dammit, Jack, I been worried sick."
"Didn't ya get the messages I sent?" Jack sounded both hurt and despondent.
"Only got one. Mornin' after the quake."
"Damn. I sent a couple a more. Ham radio operators been real good 'bout passin' 'em on. Guess with the phone lines bein' down and the power out, they got more'n they could handle. I'm real sorry, Ennis. Would a found a way ta call sooner, if I'd known. Waited 'till today 'cause I knew you'd be there."
Jack had tried. That's all Ennis needed to know, well, that and that Jack was still alive and unhurt. "'s okay, Bud."
"Ennis?"
The hint of eagerness in Jack's tone that gave Ennis' heart a jolt. "Yeah?"
"I'm stayin' here."
"Huh?"
"I ain't shippin' out ta 'Nam next week, like I was supposed to."
The lump in Ennis' throat would not be swallowed, not that any words were possible either. Next week? Sweet Jesus, he hadn't known it was gonna be that soon.
"Base commander got me a PCS ta Ft. Richardson. Said weren't no point in shippin' me out jus' ta send someone else in, not with this place in the mess it is."
"Got ya a piece a what?"
"Sorry, Cowboy. A 'p' 'c' 's'. That's a Permanent Change a Station. Means I'm gonna be here for at least a year. Best part is that Alaska is considered an overseas assignment, even though there ain't no sea 'tween it an' the rest a the states. That means even if I get shipped out in a year, I won't have ta go ta 'Nam, 'cause I'd a done served my required overseas time."
The words had been heard, but nothing was registering too clearly. "Ya don't never gotta go...over there?"
"Nope."
Ennis sent up a prayer of thanks, and then wondered what kind of man he was. How could he be happy about a disaster that had caused so much pain to so many? But how could he not be happy knowing that it was over? Jack didn't have to go. That was one nightmare that he no longer had to endure.
"That's real good news, Jack," he said when he finally found his voice.
Jack's voice got low. "Been missin' ya real bad, 'specially after havin' them few days with ya almost all ta myself."
The heat crept up Ennis' neck all the way to his ears. A strained silence filled the line between them. Never enough. Word would never be enough, but there was something he had promised himself he would say. "Need ya, Bud."
As if Jack could read his thoughts, he added. "Always gonna need ya, Cowboy. Only be two years. Gotta make do 'til then."
"Yeah."
"Be easier, now."
Jack wasn't going to Vietnam. "Sure will."
"How's Rich?"
"Better. Gonna keep runnin' the motel."
"That's good. Ownin' that motel'll give ya a reason ta be there when I get out in a couple a years."
Although he could hear the smile in Jack's voice, Ennis' nerves had been on edge for too long to let that comment go unchallenged. "Already got all the reason I need ta be here when ya get back."
"Damn, Ennis," Jack breathed.
The weight of old fears settled in, but now they were just plain realities. "Jack, I cain't see how we're ever gonna be able ta make this thing work, but...all I know is I let ya go once. Ain't gonna be makin' that mistake again."
"We'll make it work, Cowboy. You'll see."
Ennis licked at lips that were suddenly painfully dry, but there was no relieve in the touch from his parched tongue. "Might be we'll end up dead in ditch with our dicks ripped off."
"Might be we won't."
"Jack..." There were no words to say what he was feeling, at least none that his simple cowboy mind could string together. For the first time in years he cursed that damned old truck and its failed transmission. If he'd made it to being a sophomore like he'd wanted so badly, he just knew he would know how to say all them things Jack deserved to hear.
"Ennis..."
"Luv ya." The words came out gravely, and nothing at all like the warm softness they occupied in his deepest of hearts. Words so precious and rare, that didn't deserve to be spoken by the same voice that had so easily spoke of all the things that were wrong because of them. But he forced them out anyway, because they were all he had to offer.
There was only static on the line, and for a brief moment he held his breath, waiting for those damned clicking sounds that had always signaled the end of his time with Jack. Only things were different now, there wasn't no sitting there, keeping track of the time, ready to disconnect them just because the hand on a watch had moved.
"Six hunnerd an' fifty-four," Jack's tender voice broke through the static, the sound so gentle and loving that it didn't seem real. "Ya only got six hunnerd an' fifty-four more days 'fore yer stuck with me fer the rest a yer life."
The image was so clear it was scary. Jack in a wedding dress, a big bouquet of flowers in his hand as he stumbled down the isle of a church, wearing heeled pumps too small and wobbly for his man-sized feet. Ennis lifting a heavy veil, only to find a hairy upper lip staring back at him.
"Jack?"
"Yeah, Cowboy?"
Before he could make a total asshole of himself, Ennis shook off that absurd notion. He must have had too much a that brandy covered desert thing that Thelma and her daughter-in-law had cooked up. The only option left to him was to distract Jack with something more tempting than what they were going to have to wait for.
"Ya stayin' warm 'nough, Bud?"
"Fuck no, I ain't! Goddamn freezin' my balls off 'round here..."
The sound of Jack's complaining was like a soothing balm to Ennis' frayed nerves. No one could bitch like his Jack, and if Jack was bitching, then he had to be okay.
After exchanging good-byes that left him feeling both empty and full to the brim, Ennis walked into the living room, his heart lighter and his head in the clouds. Four pairs of questioning eyes stared at him.
"Jack's okay," he mumbled through his embarrassment. For a few minutes he had forgotten that he wasn't the only one who cared about Jack. "Said he's cold."
Elmer snorted and Thelma wiped a way a tear. Lindsey looked up at Bert and whispered too loudly, "Who's Jack? He can have my coat, if he's cold."
Bert smiled at her. "I'm sure Jack would appreciate that, Honey. But he'd be mighty upset if you got cold because you gave him your coat."
"But mommy says sharing is nice."
At the very moment Gwen slipped by Ennis. She had told him about the phone call, but after that he had lost all sense of caring who was where. All he could think was that she must have gone through the kitchen while he was talking to Jack. He was so used to not noticing the Fleishmans, that he might not have noticed her, either. He bristled at the thought of her hearing words that had been said just for Jack.
"Sharing is always nice, Honey. But your coat would be way too small for a man as big as Jack."
"How big is he?" the little girl asked.
Gwen sat down on the arm of her husband's chair and looked over at Ennis. Her face was completely unreadable. "I'm not sure. I've never met him, but I imagine he's about the same size as his friend, Mr. del Mar."
Friend? Had there been something less than friendly in her tone when she said that word? And why had he become Mr. del Mar, after being just Ennis all day? A cold chill that would make Alaska seem warm swept over him.
TBC...
AUTHOR: VNapier
PAIRING: Ennis/Jack
RATING: R - NC17
FEEDBACK: Always. E mail me at BBMFAN@ZOOMINTERNET.NET
DISCLAIMERS: Standard disclaimers. The characters are not mine, but the story is.
SUMMARY: This is a sequel to 'If Anyone Can Show Just Cause, Speak Now...' and 'Til Death Do Us Part'. Those stories can be found on my
livejournal at http://vln-bbmfan.livejournal.com/
part 1 - http://vln-bbmfan.livejournal.com/23041.html
part 2 - http://vln-bbmfan.livejournal.com/23455.html
Hell.
That was the only way Ennis could have described the week he had just endured. The wintry weather had ceased to be an issue, the round up preparations were complete, fences had been mended, water holes checked, and the grazing was as good as it had been in years. Even Jack's fucking truck hadn't sputtered or backfired the whole fucking time; there was absolutely nothing to occupy his increasingly frazzled mind. He ate, he slept, he worked, and then he went to his room and worried.
By Saturday he was so wound up he didn't even bother going by the market to do any shopping. He couldn't face the Fleishman's. If Jack had called, they would have gotten word to him. Jack hadn't called, but he couldn't stand the thought of hearing those words spoke out loud.
The only bright spot was the hour or so every evening he spent with Rich. The old man was looking better, or maybe Ennis just hoped it was so. Sometimes they talked about Sage, and the way things were before Ennis' daddy killed Earl. They never directly talked about Earl, though, or Ennis' father, which suited Ennis just fine.
The rest of the time they played poker, using beer caps for chips, or just sat and watched the television. It was safe to do so until the eleven o'clock news came on, and by then, the television was long since turned off. Ennis didn't want to hear anything else that didn't come first hand from Jack, himself.
On Sunday, he was torn between dread and anticipation. If Jack was able to call, he would do it that afternoon. The problem was that Ennis wasn't sure he could walk away if that phone didn't ring, not without ripping it off the wall, first. However, those thoughts were lost in the confusion when he reached the Fleishman's house and was practically pulled from his truck by an exuberant Elmer.
"Ennis, come over here. I'd like you to meet my youngest boy, Bert."
Ennis shook a younger version of Elmer's hand. It was uncanny, how much father and son looked alike, only Bert still had a full head of wavy brown hair, where Elmer's was gray and missing on top. It was hard to think of this man as a 'youngest boy', considering he was over a handful of years older than Ennis.
"Come on inside and meet Gwen, Bert's wife, and her," Elmer flinched and gave his son an apologetic smile. "And *their* daughter, Lindsey."
*** *** *** ***
Ennis inhaled deeply. It had officially been Spring for two weeks, but the night air still carried a chill once the sun settled behind the Big Horns. From inside he could hear laughter, but it only made him feel more alone.
He had tried to excuse himself as soon as the introductions were over, but Thelma would have none of it. Elmer, either, but it was Thelma's pleading look that he could not ignore. From what he could tell, Bert's wife was a real nice lady, and Ennis was glad that Elmer seemed to have gotten over any reservations he had about her, but he could tell that Thelma had been extremely hurt by the news that her son had gotten married without his parents being there.
It was for Thelma's sake that Ennis had found the courage to stick around, but as the day wore on, he found himself genuinely liking both Bert and Gwendolyn Fleishman. The news that Bert had officially adopted Gwen's little girl, Lindsey, had been shocking, too, but didn't seem nearly as hurtful as the secret wedding.
Lindsey, who had her mother's green eyes and a lighter shade of blonde hair, would be turning six on Wednesday. Bert and Gwen both swore that she was usually much more rambunctious and outgoing, but she quietly clung to her mother's side for most of the evening and all through dinner. They had been on the road since five that morning, and after two full days of driving, the little girl was worn out.
Lindsey's quiet demeanor reminded Ennis of Glen, and how he had been back on that fateful day in Casper. The boy had come out of his shell, just like Delilah said, something Ennis had witnessed first hand as Glen played with the gaggle of kids at his birthday party a week ago.
Ennis had been reluctant to go, but something deep inside was more persistent, and he went, just to get his insides straightened out. Delilah had welcomed him with a weary, but genuine smile. C.C.'s welcome had been more boisterous, and Ennis worried that the foreman was still hoping for a romance between his sister and Ennis. Glen had been thrilled to see him, and truth be told, Ennis had found comfort in seeing the little boy bouncing around so happy. By the time he left, he was actually proud that he had gone. It was a new feeling, and one that he selfishly hoped to experience again.
While he was still a little wary of Delilah, he couldn't help but respect her for having the courage to save her son from the man she had mistakenly chosen for a husband. A comment or two made over dinner led him to believe that Bert's wife might have been doing right by her child, too, when she saddled herself with the stigma that came with being a divorcee. Both women made him all the more resentful of the mother who had not done a damn thing to save Jack.
"Mind if I join you?"
Ennis was startled to look up and see Bert's wife step out onto the patio and pull the sliding glass doors closed.
"Ma'am."
"I just wanted to thank you."
"What fer?"
"For talking to Bert's father." She looked up at Ennis, her green eyes sparkling in the dim light of the quarter moon. "Bert has been so jealous of you."
Ennis' stomach sank. "Why?"
"Every time he called here, you were all his parents could talk about. You and your friend, Jack. He said it was just like them to want to help out, but he felt...I don't know, like he was being replaced. I think that's why he finally got the nerve to tell his father about us dating. It was hard on him when his father reacted so badly."
"Didn't mean no harm. Jus' bein' a friend."
Gwen moved closer and leaned against the porch support, her arms crossed across her chest under her husband's coat that was draped over her shoulders. "Bert knows that now. He knew it then, too, but it was hard, thinking that his parents had found someone else to love and to take care of. It really helped, finding out that you were the one who got his father to give me a chance."
Ennis tensed. How much did she know? She knew about Jack, knew his name. What if-
"Bert worries about them, up here all by themselves. He's tried to get them to sell out and move to Alabama, but they like it up here." She took a deep breath. "I can see why, too. It's beautiful country." Then returned to her original thought, "Now Bert's just grateful to know they have such a good friend."
She cocked her head and smiled at him. "I hope you don't mind me saying so, but you are an exceptional young man. Most men your age wouldn't be bothered with spending time visiting an older couple."
The Fleishmans were good people. It wasn't any effort to be good to them, and especially not when they had been so much better to him. He didn't have the words to say anything like that, though. A small breeze blew the smoke from his cigarette in her direction. Quickly, he snuffed the fire out of the tip, and glanced over in surprise when Gwen laughed.
"You don't have to put that out on my account. I'm used to Bert's cigars." She glanced over her shoulder and into the house through the picture window. "I'm actually surprised that he isn't out here, too."
As if on cue, the patio door slid open and Bert and Elmer filed out. Gwen's face lit up and she ended up in an embrace that made Ennis turn away in frustrated envy. Elmer's understanding hand on his shoulder only helped a little.
"I'll leave you men to your smoking," Gwen said, leaving Bert his coat and hurrying off into the warm interior of the house.
"I'm afraid I've gotten soft since moving to Alabama," Bert laughed as he shivered, even in his coat. "I don't remember it being this cold when I lived here."
"Some folks jus' don't take too well ta bein' cold," Ennis mumbled.
Elmer's hand tightened on Ennis' shoulder. "Jack was always complaining about the cold," Elmer explained to his son.
"And he's in Alaska?" Bert's voice was laced with incredulous sympathy. "Dad tells me you haven't heard anything in a while."
Breathing got difficult and Ennis suddenly wanted nothing more than to be gone from there, away from those who could be what he and Jack never could, away from those who didn't have the slightest clue how fucking cold it was in Wyoming. It could be a hundred and twelve, and that bed back in that damn motel would still be ice cold.
"Ennis," Gwen called from the door. "Telephone."
Jack! Everyone and everything else was forgotten. For a week Ennis had been battling his own fears while trying to ignore the words of those around him, but the one thing he had not been able to erase was that fleeting image of a stretch of pavement, twisted and split right down the middle. Pictures didn't lie.
"It's Jack," Thelma handed Ennis the receiver with a tearful smile.
"Bud?" he asked hesitantly into the plastic mouthpiece.
"Damn, Cowboy. You got no idea how good it is ta hear yer voice."
"Reckon I do," Ennis choked out. "Been seein'...hearin'..."
"It's real crazy up here. Ain't never seen nothin' like it. One big fuckin' pile a mess."
"But yer...yer okay, right?" Fear and worry would not be contained any longer. "Dammit, Jack, I been worried sick."
"Didn't ya get the messages I sent?" Jack sounded both hurt and despondent.
"Only got one. Mornin' after the quake."
"Damn. I sent a couple a more. Ham radio operators been real good 'bout passin' 'em on. Guess with the phone lines bein' down and the power out, they got more'n they could handle. I'm real sorry, Ennis. Would a found a way ta call sooner, if I'd known. Waited 'till today 'cause I knew you'd be there."
Jack had tried. That's all Ennis needed to know, well, that and that Jack was still alive and unhurt. "'s okay, Bud."
"Ennis?"
The hint of eagerness in Jack's tone that gave Ennis' heart a jolt. "Yeah?"
"I'm stayin' here."
"Huh?"
"I ain't shippin' out ta 'Nam next week, like I was supposed to."
The lump in Ennis' throat would not be swallowed, not that any words were possible either. Next week? Sweet Jesus, he hadn't known it was gonna be that soon.
"Base commander got me a PCS ta Ft. Richardson. Said weren't no point in shippin' me out jus' ta send someone else in, not with this place in the mess it is."
"Got ya a piece a what?"
"Sorry, Cowboy. A 'p' 'c' 's'. That's a Permanent Change a Station. Means I'm gonna be here for at least a year. Best part is that Alaska is considered an overseas assignment, even though there ain't no sea 'tween it an' the rest a the states. That means even if I get shipped out in a year, I won't have ta go ta 'Nam, 'cause I'd a done served my required overseas time."
The words had been heard, but nothing was registering too clearly. "Ya don't never gotta go...over there?"
"Nope."
Ennis sent up a prayer of thanks, and then wondered what kind of man he was. How could he be happy about a disaster that had caused so much pain to so many? But how could he not be happy knowing that it was over? Jack didn't have to go. That was one nightmare that he no longer had to endure.
"That's real good news, Jack," he said when he finally found his voice.
Jack's voice got low. "Been missin' ya real bad, 'specially after havin' them few days with ya almost all ta myself."
The heat crept up Ennis' neck all the way to his ears. A strained silence filled the line between them. Never enough. Word would never be enough, but there was something he had promised himself he would say. "Need ya, Bud."
As if Jack could read his thoughts, he added. "Always gonna need ya, Cowboy. Only be two years. Gotta make do 'til then."
"Yeah."
"Be easier, now."
Jack wasn't going to Vietnam. "Sure will."
"How's Rich?"
"Better. Gonna keep runnin' the motel."
"That's good. Ownin' that motel'll give ya a reason ta be there when I get out in a couple a years."
Although he could hear the smile in Jack's voice, Ennis' nerves had been on edge for too long to let that comment go unchallenged. "Already got all the reason I need ta be here when ya get back."
"Damn, Ennis," Jack breathed.
The weight of old fears settled in, but now they were just plain realities. "Jack, I cain't see how we're ever gonna be able ta make this thing work, but...all I know is I let ya go once. Ain't gonna be makin' that mistake again."
"We'll make it work, Cowboy. You'll see."
Ennis licked at lips that were suddenly painfully dry, but there was no relieve in the touch from his parched tongue. "Might be we'll end up dead in ditch with our dicks ripped off."
"Might be we won't."
"Jack..." There were no words to say what he was feeling, at least none that his simple cowboy mind could string together. For the first time in years he cursed that damned old truck and its failed transmission. If he'd made it to being a sophomore like he'd wanted so badly, he just knew he would know how to say all them things Jack deserved to hear.
"Ennis..."
"Luv ya." The words came out gravely, and nothing at all like the warm softness they occupied in his deepest of hearts. Words so precious and rare, that didn't deserve to be spoken by the same voice that had so easily spoke of all the things that were wrong because of them. But he forced them out anyway, because they were all he had to offer.
There was only static on the line, and for a brief moment he held his breath, waiting for those damned clicking sounds that had always signaled the end of his time with Jack. Only things were different now, there wasn't no sitting there, keeping track of the time, ready to disconnect them just because the hand on a watch had moved.
"Six hunnerd an' fifty-four," Jack's tender voice broke through the static, the sound so gentle and loving that it didn't seem real. "Ya only got six hunnerd an' fifty-four more days 'fore yer stuck with me fer the rest a yer life."
The image was so clear it was scary. Jack in a wedding dress, a big bouquet of flowers in his hand as he stumbled down the isle of a church, wearing heeled pumps too small and wobbly for his man-sized feet. Ennis lifting a heavy veil, only to find a hairy upper lip staring back at him.
"Jack?"
"Yeah, Cowboy?"
Before he could make a total asshole of himself, Ennis shook off that absurd notion. He must have had too much a that brandy covered desert thing that Thelma and her daughter-in-law had cooked up. The only option left to him was to distract Jack with something more tempting than what they were going to have to wait for.
"Ya stayin' warm 'nough, Bud?"
"Fuck no, I ain't! Goddamn freezin' my balls off 'round here..."
The sound of Jack's complaining was like a soothing balm to Ennis' frayed nerves. No one could bitch like his Jack, and if Jack was bitching, then he had to be okay.
After exchanging good-byes that left him feeling both empty and full to the brim, Ennis walked into the living room, his heart lighter and his head in the clouds. Four pairs of questioning eyes stared at him.
"Jack's okay," he mumbled through his embarrassment. For a few minutes he had forgotten that he wasn't the only one who cared about Jack. "Said he's cold."
Elmer snorted and Thelma wiped a way a tear. Lindsey looked up at Bert and whispered too loudly, "Who's Jack? He can have my coat, if he's cold."
Bert smiled at her. "I'm sure Jack would appreciate that, Honey. But he'd be mighty upset if you got cold because you gave him your coat."
"But mommy says sharing is nice."
At the very moment Gwen slipped by Ennis. She had told him about the phone call, but after that he had lost all sense of caring who was where. All he could think was that she must have gone through the kitchen while he was talking to Jack. He was so used to not noticing the Fleishmans, that he might not have noticed her, either. He bristled at the thought of her hearing words that had been said just for Jack.
"Sharing is always nice, Honey. But your coat would be way too small for a man as big as Jack."
"How big is he?" the little girl asked.
Gwen sat down on the arm of her husband's chair and looked over at Ennis. Her face was completely unreadable. "I'm not sure. I've never met him, but I imagine he's about the same size as his friend, Mr. del Mar."
Friend? Had there been something less than friendly in her tone when she said that word? And why had he become Mr. del Mar, after being just Ennis all day? A cold chill that would make Alaska seem warm swept over him.
TBC...