Michael is leaving tomorrow instead of Thursday because he needs to do things at home. I hate unexpected changes and being alone, so this is slightly difficult for me. Also my moods have been very erratic. I don't know if this is breakthrough bipolar symptoms or not. I'm not having any current interpersonal problems and I think even if Amber ( Read more... )

Today I woke up fairly early, but slept much better last night. I went bike riding with my mother, but it was really hot out and I'm in bad shape so it was exhausting. I decided not to get ice cream (which my mother usually buys for me on our bike rides). I just felt too nauseated and hot. I've felt nauseated consistently for the past couple of ( Read more... )

Well I started taking Geodon last night, instead of Zyprexa. We'll see what happens... Hopefully if my bipolar gets bad I will be able to keep in mind things are factually fine, it's only my bipolar acting up. I've been able to keep myself somewhat sane on antidepressants by telling myself it was the medication making me crazy (which is true). ( Read more... )

I talked to my psychiatrist about my overeating while on Zyprexa, to the point of making myself very ill. I said how taking Ritalin LA in the early evening, as well as in the morning, controls my hunger and keeps me from overeating. His first idea was to decrease my Zyprexa dosage, but he doesn't have my file at home and I don't know if he ( Read more... )

From time to time I am still having negative feelings or judgments, but I am getting better at noticing those thoughts/feelings and reasoning with myself why I shouldn't act on them and how those thoughts/feelings will pass. They always do pass. I go back to feeling happy with my life and the people I know. I don't want to ruin a relationship to ( Read more... )

Today I visited April and we walked to the comic book store (at least I got some exercise in!) and we watched Buffy the Vampire Slayer. They were actually episodes I was familiar with. I should watch more of the series someday. It was also fun just talking to April. It's nice to get out of the house and I usually feel better in the presence of ( Read more... )

I've been reading The Happiness Project blog: http://www.happiness-project.com/happiness_project/Read more... )

Getting out of the house helped my mood. Sometimes it helps, sometimes it doesn't. There have been many times I've started panicking over an obsession in public and just had to get home so I could be crazy in private. Being into a lot of activities and going to classes didn't help my dysphoric mania in college, either. So it's hard to know what ( Read more... )

Today we did a lot of cleaning up. I am going to Michael's house tomorrow and hope I can get more editing done on my story. I'm going more slowly now at editing it. I emailed a couple of old friends I have contact with through Facebook. I hope they email back. One lives in London. It would be nice to at least email with them. Sometimes I ( Read more... )

I'm feeling much more at peace after taking my medication. I made a mistake and it won't happen again. It hadn't happened, and I hadn't had the urge to peek, for many months. Overall my life has been really good lately and a lot of good things are happening. Michael is driving and will move in soon, I've got my art and writing, I'm on good ( Read more... )