Now and Forever...Itsumademo... - Chapter 09A
Title: Now and Forever…いつまでも…
Author: Mayonaka no Taiyou/Unare Haineko
Pairing: [Juntoshi] Matsumoto Jun x Ohno Satoshi
Rating: PG-13-ish overall
Summary: This story follows Ayumu, a more or less normal child born in 2012, three years after the ending of ‘Kodoku kara Umareta Ai’ (which you can read here). His parents, Jun and Ohno, are everything but ‘normal’ in their often unconventional attempts to deal with some of the challenges of parenthood as they try to ‘blend in’ with ‘normal people’.
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Now and Forever…Itsumademo - Chapter 09
8:56 PM…
They had been driving in silence as they rode back to the apartment. When Ohno’s father drove up the parking lot ramp, Ohno’s mother broke the silence.
“Dear, you will go home tonight,” she instructed.
“What about you-“
“I will stay with Satoshi and Ayumu tonight-“
“But-“
One glare from Ohno’s mother was enough to shut his father up.
“You can just drop us off here,” Ohno’s mother said, pressing the button to unlock the doors. “Satoshi, Ayumu. Let’s go.”
“Yes, baachan!” called Ayumu, opening the door and following his tight lipped grandmother.
They rode up the elevator in silence and as soon as Ohno unlocked the door to the apartment, Ohno’s mother spoke again.
“Ayumu, sit down on the living room couch over there now.”
“Yes, baachan,” Ayumu replied, doing as he was told.
“Satoshi, you sit there,” she said, pointing to the spot next to Ayumu. “Ayumu, that was a very dangerous thing you did back there at the restaurant. Why did you lie to jiichan about going to the bathroom with Satoshi-papa?”
“I dunno,” shrugged Ayumu.
“Don’t lie to me, Ayumu,” warned Ohno’s mother. “Why did you lie to jiichan?”
“Because…”
“Because what?”
“Because I wanted to see Nino-niisan! I heard an oneesan telling another oneesan that Nino-niisan was at the French restaurant next door.”
“Why didn’t you ask?” interrupted Ohno.
“Because you all would have said no and I wanted to see Nino-niisan!” pouted Ayumu.
“Did you see him?” asked Ohno’s mother, regaining control of the conversation.
“No. I went outside, but I didn’t know which one was the French restaurant.”
“Why didn’t you come back right away?”
“Because I saw a weird man who asked me for money. I got scared so I ran away, but I thought I saw Satoshi-papa’s head, so I ran to him. But it wasn’t Satoshi-papa.”
“Who was it, Ayumu?”
“It was someone else. But he looked like Satoshi-papa! But he wasn’t. His voice was different.”
“Different in what way?”
“I don’t know. Um… Satoshi-papa’s voice is like a violin. The fake Satoshi-papa’s voice was like a bigger violin.”
“It was lower then?”
“But his face was just like Satoshi-papa and he was kissing someone that looked like Jun-papa. But this Jun-papa was dark and short! But they looked like Satoshi-papa and Jun-papa from afar because the fake Jun-papa was kissing the fake Satoshi-papa, not the opposite way.”
“And do you remember anything else about the people you bumped into?”
“Hmm…”
“Anything at all?”
Ayumu closed his eyes and tried to think back.
“I smelled him before!” Ayumu exclaimed suddenly.
“You smelled him before?”
“When I hugged him, I smelled his clothes. I smelled him before.”
“Where, Ayumu?”
“In Satoshi-papa’s closet!” Ayumu said, running to the bedroom and turning on the lights.
Ohno and Ohno’s mother followed him into the room, where Ayumu pulled out a clear plastic storage bin from the closet.
“He smells like this!” Ayumu said, pulling out the folded shirt and handing it to Ohno’s mother.
The mother and son leaned in and took in the scent of the shirt.
“Ayumu, why does he smell like this shirt?” asked Ohno’s mother.
“They have the same smell!”
“And what smell is that?”
“Lemon air freshener and ‘TOPPU (Top)’ laundry powder!”
“You know what kind of laundry soap too?”
“It’s not the same as the one Jun-papa uses.”
“How so, Ayumu?” asked Ohno’s mother curiously.
“Jun-papa uses ‘BOORUDO (Bold) not ‘TOPPU’. Yumi-neechan’s place uses ‘ATAKKU (Attack)’.”
“I don’t get it,” Ohno said.
“Satoshi-papa! ‘TOPPU’ is red, yellow, and white box. ‘ATAKKU’ is the green-blue one. ‘BOORUDO’ is blue and pink. But Jun-papa doesn’t use powder.”
“He doesn’t?”
“No. He uses the not-powder-one in the jar you have to pour,” said Ayumu, adding the gesture for effect.
“You mean the liquid type in the bottle?” corrected Ohno’s mother.
“Yeah, the one in the bottle.”
“Ayumu, how do you know if the laundry soap was powder or liquid?”
“They smell different.”
“Even the same brands?”
“Yes. I smelled them at the store once when Jun-papa wasn’t looking. I remember the smells. One time Jun-papa told Satoshi-papa to buy some more soap and wash the towels while he took me to the teeth doctor and Satoshi-papa bought the wrong one! He bought the powder and Jun-papa was livid!”
“Wow, that’s a big word you know, Ayumu.”
“I remember Satoshi-papa asking why Jun-papa was that word. And when I asked Jun-papa later, Jun-papa told me ‘livid’ means ‘very angry’. I don’t know why you have to use ‘livid’ when ‘very angry’ is so much easier to understand…Maybe it was because Jun-papa could tell the smell was different too? I don’t know, but all of Jun-papa’s clothes smell the same, but some of Satoshi-papa’s clothes smell different.”
“How do Satoshi-papa’s clothes smell different?”
“Some of them smell like Jun-papa’s clothes, others smell like baachan’s clothes, and the others smell like the fake Satoshi-papa’s clothes.”
“What else, Ayumu?”
“Hmm…the fake Satoshi-papa smells like cigarettes too, but he doesn’t smoke. The smoke smell on his shirt is really strong, but he’s not the smoker.”
“What about the fake Jun-papa?”
“He smokes, but he smokes a different brand than the one that the fake Satoshi-papa smells like.”
“Ayumu, how do you know that the fake me doesn’t smoke?” asked Ohno.
“Silly, Satoshi-papa. Don’t you know?” giggled Ayumu. “Can’t you taste it when you kiss Jun-papa?”
“Taste what?” Ohno questioned.
“The cigarette smell! Can’t you smell it when he talks and breathes? Wait a minute…! Baachan! Baachan!” Ayumu quickly clung to his grandmother.
“What is it, Ayumu?”
“Maybe we took home the wrong Satoshi-papa!” the boy exclaimed in horror. “He’s too surprised about the smell! Aaauugghhh!!! Stranger in Jun-papa’s house!”
Ayumu screamed and started running around the living room. He ran about for a good ten seconds before Ohno’s mother grabbed him by the collar and yanked him back to reality as he ran around the couch.
“Ayumu!” she said sharply. “This is Satoshi-papa! Don’t be ridiculous!”
“How do you know?”
“Why would the real Satoshi-papa notice something like the smell of cigarette smoke? He doesn’t even notice when Jun-papa cuts his hair. Besides, do you think I wouldn’t know my own son?!”
Ayumu shook his head at the intimidating glare from his grandmother.
“Good. Now is there anything else?”
“No, baachan.”
“Well, then go brush your teeth and get ready for bed. I need to talk to Satoshi-papa.”
“Okay, baachan! I’ll be back, Satoshi-papa!”
Ayumu skipped to the bathroom waving. When Ayumu was in the bathroom, Ohno’s mother turned to Ohno and stared sadly into her son’s eyes.
“Tell me, Satoshi. Did you see him?”
“Who?”
“Not the Jun lookalike-your lookalike?”
“Huh?”
“Satoshi, tell me,” she urged. “Did you see your lookalike even from the corner of your eye?”
“I don’t follow…”
“Sit straight and face me. Satoshi, seeing yourself when you know it’s not your reflection is an omen of death. Now tell me, did you see yourself?”
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9:42 PM…
Jun was meditating on his food while pondering his life when his phone started ringing.
‘Miyazono Yuuichi’
Jun picked up the call.
“Hello.”
“Matsumoto-san, I’m sorry to bother you so late at night, but I have a few questions. Do you have a few minutes?”
“Sure go ahead.”
“About the contract you sent me.”
“Yes?”
“Well, I’m still reviewing it, but I was wondering if you read it before you signed it?”
“What makes you say that?”
“From what I’ve read so far, it seems that the contract is extremely unfavorable for Ohno-san and you. I was not there at the signing, but I was just wondering if you had legal counsel present when you signed this contract.”
“No. It was a deal between me and Leader with the jimusho.”
“I see.”
“What’s the matter?”
“Well, there’s not much I can do since the contract itself appears to be a bona fide contract. No monkey business. It’s fully legal and binding. But…”
“But?”
“But if I may be perfectly honest…”
“Go right ahead. You know I value your honest opinion.”
“Why did you sign something like this without first consulting me or someone in a legal capacity? Surely things could have been negotiated. In my experience, everything is negotiable, right down to your soul. But here, it is almost as if he handed you a blank piece of paper and you just signed your life away. Now I may be mistaken, but that is what it appears to be. My question is why? Why was such recklessness displayed when you and Ohno-san signed this contract? Surely this was not a matter of life and death. You could have asked for your lawyer, couldn’t you? Matsumoto-san, it pains me to read every word of this contract. I just need to know, why did you do it? Why did you sever your ties with your friends out of the blue? I thought you did not want to press charges against Ninomiya-san.”
“…”
“I know you’re generally a nice person despite the hard appearances, but you said yourself that you sometimes let your emotions get the best of you. Was this one of those times? Matsumoto-san?”
“…”
“Matsumoto-san, are you there?”
“Miyazono…can I call you back?”
“Of course.”
“Thanks.”
“Good night.”
Jun reclined back and lay supine on the tatami mat.
Of course Miyazono would ask those questions. He wasn’t there when I signed that infernal contract. But it was Nino that broke up the group! I had no choice! He was going to take away everything from everyone if I didn’t-
Jun paused mid thought as he had his first epiphany of the self-reflection process.
Wait…What would our lives have been like if I didn’t step in? Nino and I had the fight on the stairwell and when we finally were ready to settle, Johnny was there. He knew what was about to come that’s why he had those contracts prepared. He knew what it would come to. Was it because Nino told him? Did Nino screw Arashi because I screwed him? But he didn’t want Leader-Stop it, Jun! This is not about you and Leader and how you’re not to blame since you didn’t technically take him from Nino. It doesn’t matter since Nino saw it differently and authorized the dissolution of the group. But then what…?
Then Johnny knew how you would react when Nino authorized the dissolution because he had shown you before what happens to those who lose the backing of the jimusho. He had that contract ready. He may not have anticipated Leader to be there, but Leader wasn’t the target. The target had been you and you played right into his trap, Jun! You’re so predictably stupid!
“NO!” Jun shouted as he fought with himself.
No? It’s true! What if you didn’t step in and decide for everyone that you and Leader would back out of the entertainment industry-but Nino was going to do a solo career! We wouldn’t be Arashi anymore!-That may be the case, but there would still be four of the five. How can you say that Aiba and Sho would not have chosen your friendship over their careers? Ten years together, over half of which all of you spent doing embarrassing, dorky, uncelebrity-like things. Do you think Sho would have wanted that? You of all people know how hard he fought to stay in the jimusho and stay a part of Arashi. You couldn’t even give him the courtesy to make that decision for himself! Do you really think Aiba would have wanted that? Aiba, who says that the most important people in his life are the members of Arashi. Pretty presumptuous of you to just assume that was what they would have wanted.
“My intentions were good!”
And now what do you have? You have Leader and Ayumu. You have money and the wonderful Ohno family’s support. But you’re miserable because you did something that you shouldn’t have done! You decided what everyone else’s happiness would be, dragged Leader into all of this…maybe that was his plan all along…to have you and Nino ruin Arashi so he wouldn’t have to-
“That makes no sense!”
Predictably irrational MatsuJun... This coming from the man who displayed completely irrational behavior when he agreed to that stupid contract? You’ve always taken advantage of your position as the youngest member of the group. You make them spoil you and indulge in your selfishness all the time-
“No!” Jun shouted as he turned over onto his belly and sobbed into a cushion lying on the floor.
You know what kind of person you are, Jun… Arrogant! Stubborn! Controlling! Manipulative! Hot-headed! Irrational! Unreasonable! And selfish! And that’s why you did what you did! Only selfish people like you would do such a horrible thing! Maybe you were the one who didn’t want Arashi to stay together, huh? You’re the worst kind of human. You screw your own friend by stealing his boyfriend and then when he retaliates, you bring in your big shot lawyer. But even he wasn’t able to save you from your big mouth and short temper. Nino may have destroyed Arashi on paper, but the one who really broke up the group was YOU when YOU decided to play God and decide the next direction everyone should move in! And now that you’ve woven the tapestry as such, only now you realize you should have planned everything a little better and should not have been so quick to react to such provocation. You were the one with the big shot lawyer who has made a career of taking down people like Johnny. Yet you couldn’t even use one of your best resources in a way that would have benefited Arashi! What a selfish idiot and a fine piece of work you are!
“I’m not a bad person…I’m not a bad person…” Jun clutched his head and wept as he cried himself to sleep.
>>> Chapter 09B
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