things are so fucked up in oregon ...i need out it only gets worse the fear that consumes you will eventually just eat at you until it eats you up life it's just sucky lately , my ex pulled a gun on me said that since i hurt him by leaving him that he should just kill me now but said nope instaed im going to make you live in fear until one ( Read more... )

i havnt wrote in here for awhile and i have alot to write abotu but im in a pretty good mood and dont feel likr ruining this rare mood so i love ya all <3333333333333

im so damn lost . i feel absolutely nothing

well anyways my lifes fucked up as usual my family is all messed up talking shit that aint true , my kids hate me , all guys are stupid fucking asses , they put me on lexapro pills for antidepressants and anxiety not that they are actual going to help my fucked up situation , i cant stay at my grandmas now cause her and my fucking bitch sister ( Read more... )

i cant stand this anymore i have no house no job now no phone and i cant have anyone call my grandmas without her being a major bitch about it, like today she starts her shit on me because her caregiver linda didnt get there until after 2 to get her up i hear her start in on linda then the phone rings i pick it up and she gets on me cause i picked ( Read more... )

i'm 28 today not like anyone cares but hey you know what i dont either im not planning on being here long i mean im moving i just realized that might sound wrong

i am so dissapointed with my life and i did this most days i dont even want to get out of bed , i talked to the doctor and she told me that these panic attacks arent going to last and eventually i would get over them i need fucking pills to get over this and she wont give me them which really pisses me off i went to the fucking hospital cause i ( Read more... )

another thing is my grandma doesnt know and well the doctor called her so now im going to have to hear how much more of a fuckup i am than she thinks i already have been "sigh"

ok so i was in the hospital all night well actually i was there for and hour and a half getting checked and and i was there from 1 30 to 6 00 waiting for a ride i came howm ate some toast and slept the doctor called and woke me up at 10 seeing if i wanted to come in at 1 30 anyways the basic thing i was in there for was i just had a major nervous ( Read more... )

you know what im getting really damn tired of getting accused of sleeping around by my ex i dont sleep around never have its just stupid and pathetic all because why? i left him and hes a sicko freak who would thorw a fit if i didnt have sex with him hes unpluggint the phone line damnit so ill be back later