entry 072 - all summer long [9/14]
Title: All Summer Long
Author: jamie_love13
Beta-Edited: Madison, but not for this chapter
Pairings/Characters: Attempted Sandy/Jared, Past Jeff/Jared, Misha/Jared, Tom/Jared, Mike/Tom
Word Count: 4,500 Words
Rating: NC-17
Summary: Jared admits to why he was in the hospital and then takes out his emotions by screwing.
Disclaimer: Definitely don't own.
Warnings: Mentions of rape, guys. Slutty!Jared, but he's pretty depressed right now.
Notes: Wow, two chapters in two days. Enjoy this one. Next chapter's going to be dark and then the next one even darker. It's climax time, folks ;)
Previous Post | Masterpost
The bass is thumping, the walls reverberating with the noise that they cause, and Jensen looks around, can see the party going into full throttle party mode. He sees Mike and Jared together with Tom and Misha across from them, smoking on what no doubtedly could be a joint, which just makes Jensen snort because since when does Jared willingly smoke pot unless he isn’t already completely trashed?
The room Jensen’s in is crowded, bodies pressing against each other, heat blanketing one another with extremity. Jensen just wants to go outside and into the cool air but doing so would put him right by Jared’s view and he wants to be the one watching, wants to be the one observing Jared, seeing what’s changed between the younger man. At the same time though, Jensen wants to piss the younger man off, wants to push his buttons the only way he can, because he sure as hell can’t fuck Jared like he use to, though he definitely fucking wants to.
He can hear Jared’s laughter from where he is, and his heart just clenches at the familiar noise, so he turns away from anything Jared related - which isn’t as easy as you’d think it’d be - and looks out at the stars, gulping back his whiskey in one long drink. He can still feel his ex-boyfriend though, can feel the heat of his stare and just knows that Jared keeps looking at him and god he wants to look back, but he’s not going to, won’t cave in to that kind of pressure, not right now.
His glass is empty now and he hates this, hates having his every fucking move be dictated by his heart. Sighing angrily, Jensen stands up, a little wobbly, and makes his way towards the kitchen, where all the good fucking alcohol is, ignoring the feeling his stomach makes when he thinks about how close to Jared he’ll be. He can see Chris in the kitchen, heads towards him, keeping very clear of Jared, his emotions and any thought processes that come with that kind of emotional impact.
Once he gets to Chris, he can see all of the whiskey, bourbon and tequila bottles and grabs a tequila bottle, gulping it from the bottle, chugging it down quickly. He notices Chris grin at him and grins back, realizing some of the alcohol is dripping down his chin and laughs, wiping it off of said chin and holding his sides. Chris is wearing a cowboy hat, towing off his boots, brand new and no doubt killing him. Jensen has to roll his eyes, snorting. You can take the cowboy out of Texas and all that shit, but Chris just takes it to the fucking extreme at times. He grins, takes a shot of bourbon and feels it slide down his throat, smooth and easy and fucking just what he needs at this moment.
“Sup, man?!” Jensen laughs, getting another shot of something, doesn’t know what, doesn’t want to know what either. He can see Jared pass around the joint and he wants - itches for one right now, and he sees Chris look over at jared and smirk at Jensen.
“Yo, Jay!” Chris shouts and Jensen freezes, especially when he notices that Jared is too high enough to care that he’s coming towards Jensen, openly grinning and laughing and generally having a good time. Jensen can’t help but notice at that point in time that Jared hasn’t been this happy at all this summer, and well, it hurts, definitely. Jensen bites his lip, looking up and down Jared, grinning.
Looking over at Jared, Chris can’t help but notice how much pain the younger man is in. He knows instantly that Jared is masking the pain by smoking more, drinking more and having a hell of a lot more sex than normal, trying hard to mask his pain that Jensen had caused him over the past year. And he also knows that even being close to the other man is killing Jared, killing him well enough that he shouldn’t be anywhere near here, but yet, he is, because he feels like Jensen’s gotten over him, that he should get over Jensen but can’t. So day after day, Chris sees Jared put on a brave fucking face and move on forward, trying so hard not to let himself get caught up in everything Jensen. Chris sees Jared’s eyes flicker towards Jensen before getting a little hurt into them and then a little coldness into them.
Chris sighs, feeling his heart clench for Jared before looking over at Jensen and seeing the exact same look in Jensen’s eyes, except, anger there too which just doesn’t make sense because Jensen wasn’t the one that got hurt here, and that kind of pisses Chris off but he masks that anger and takes another swig from the whiskey bottle, looking back over to Jared and grinning.
“We need to get crazy drunk, Jay.” Chris nearly screams to allow Jared to hear him over the thump of the bass from the music, the clang of the guitar strings and Chris sees Jared grin before flopping down onto the ground in front of him, stretching his body out and flopping his head forehead like a little hyperactive puppy would do.
Chris grins before giving the bottle in his hands to Jared and another to Jensen who’s been frozen , staring at Jared the whole time and Chris has to chuckle at that.
“Jay?” He hears Jensen whisper and the two of them both look over at Jensen, who looks absolutely shocked that he even said Jared’s nickname out loud, and bites his lip, looking down before walking away quickly, not looking at Jared. Chris looks back at Jared, sees that Jared is silently crying now, biting his own lip and watching Jensen leave him, again, fingering the ring on a chain that no one but him and the ladies know about, the ring that Jared bought Jensen.
------
Sandy watched as Jensen walked away from Jared, watched as Jared’s heart broke once again because of that foolish, idiotic fucking man that Jared ‘loved’. Sandy didn’t know how to feel about Jared’s feelings towards Jensen, but what she did know was that Jared had fucked Genevieve, had fucked a woman, which mean Sandy still definitely had a chance with the attractive man. She bites her lip before deciding to just fuck it and try her hand at seducing the poor, broken Jared. She gets up off the wall and begins walking slowly towards the other man, nearly like she’s stalking her pray. She looks Jared up and down, admiring his features and his body. Sandy hasn’t seen an attractive man like Jared in such a long time, and she needs to know what the guy is like in bed, needs to know if he’s as rough as he seems to be.
When she finally arrives to where Jared is sitting with Chris, she looks him up and down one more time before her gaze quickly slide towards Chris, attractive enough and she’s shocked to see that he’s glaring at her, almost like she’s being calculated and he isn’t exactly thrilled with what she’s planning on doing. She’s tense now, on the defence but still trying to look extremely attractive.
“Hi Jared,” she says, twirling her hair around her finger, arching her body towards the younger man and giving him a smile that would usually have a guy eating out of her palm or, ahem, other things. She grins at that thought and leans towards Jared with her body, running her finger down his chest now that she’s next to him on the ground.
“Uhm, hi Sandy?” Jared replies, a question in his voice as she watches him gulp down his confusion. She can hear Chris growl and she doesn’t care, has only eyes for Jared at this moment. Jared looks adorable, his confusion clear and Sandy giggles, leaning closer to Jared and looking at his lips, licking her own.
She giggles, leaning into Jared’s space and whispering into his ear, “Do you wanna go somewhere?” She looks at Jared afterwards, sees his eyes go up and she giggles again, no doubt a little a drunk.
“Uhm, no.” Jared replies and Sandy really wants to hear a question in that answer so she leans closer to him, wrapping her legs around his body and arching into his groin. He arches into it even though she looks completely confused and is trying to push Sandy away.
“Sandy, I’m not interested,” He says, trying his hardest to push the girl off but she clenches tighter, and she kisses him, pushing his pants down lower on his groin.
“Sandy, no!” He says causing a few people to look around and stare at them questioningly. Sandy just giggles at them, telling them he loves roleplay. Sandy’s thankful that Chris had gotten up and left, and thrusts into Jared, can feel him hardening underneath her body. She moans at the contact, throwing her head back as she does so.
Her eyes flutters and she forces them open, looks around the room and notices how empty it is and she grins at that, looking down at Jared once more. She knows, recognizes the fact that he’s said no, and she’s definitely not some kind of rapist, though she understands that she’s very close to appearing to be crossing that line right now. She leans her body down into his, and starts thrusting with their clothes still on. She knows nothing will happen with Jared, but she sure as hell can play it up a little.
“Oh god, yeah,” She moans, her head thrown back and her eyes closed, blocking out all light and sounds from the party surrounding her. She can feel her orgasm coming, and isn’t that just an hilarious thing, having an orgasm without even being penetrated. She giggles at the thought, her mouth open in a wide ‘O’ and she realizes that Jared’s eyes are closed and his face is tense.
Sandy looks closer at the other man, can see that he’s in pain and she doesn’t know what to do about that, doesn’t know why he’d be in pain.
“Sandy, off,” he says and Sandy jumps off, her eyes wide with shock and possibly, fear. Her lip quivers and she knows she shouldn’t cry but there’s something wrong with Jared, something no one knows about, something unrelated to Jensen, and that thought scares Sandy completely.
“Jared, whaa- what happened? God, I’m so sorry.” She says, tears spilling out of her eyes and her body turning away from the other man, but unable to, as she feels his hand on her arm.
“Sorry, Jared.” She replies, and he shakes his head, tears coming down silently.
“No one knows, Sandy. No one. Sometimes I just want it all to end, want all of the pain to leave me the fuck alone,” He cries and Sandy goes towards him, taking him into her arms and hugging him. She can feel Jared crying in her arms, and it just hurts her completely.
“I’m so -“
“No. No, Sandy, don’t you dare fucking pity me. I don’t need pity. I was raped. I know, I understand, I accept, and some days, I’ve moved on from it. Most days though, I’m just so fucking depressed Sandy, trying so hard to fight against all of this pain, the pain Jensen caused me, the pain this random rapist caused me. Just... all of this pain, it’s so fucking exhausting. It’s why I -“ Jared cuts himself off there, taking a gulp of air and looking past Sandy to see Danneel there, her mouth open in shock, tears streaming down her face.
“Danneel,” Sandy hears Jared say and she turns around, tries to see what Jared sees, and she knows, instantly, that all of this is going to cause a whole lot of pain to come out of everyone - too much.
-----
She’s standing at the top of the stairs that lead into the living room, can feel her eyes up in her hairline and her heart beating erratically, her face turning a bright shade of red. Danneel bites her lips and looks at Jared before nodding her head towards the kitchen, wanting to talk to him privately about what she had just heard. It’s then that she turns towards the kitchen, her back towards her best friend, unable to look at him without bursting into tears. She can feel the water in her eyes and tries her hardest to blink them away, rubbing at them with the inside of her hand. When she finally gets to the kitchen, she waits for Jared and when he enters, closing the door behind him, she tenses her body up, ready to fight even though she has no idea why.
Whatever it is that Danneel is feeling is unceremonious, definitely not wanted or needed and definitely not the way she actual feels. She has a feeling that things are going to go bad, that whatever it is that’s going to happen in the next couple of weeks, it isn’t going to end well at all.
“Dani, what’s wrong?” Danneel looks up, can see Jared’s look of confusion on his face, clear and bright as day as any other emotion that Jared tends to wear on his face. Danneel looks down at her feet, biting her lip and trying to stop the tears from falling out of her eyes, stop them from unleashing whatever kind of waterfall from underneath those lids.
“Jared, what happened?” She questions, and she still has to look at her feet but she knows that Jared’s biting his own lip, looking at his own feet and when she hears him gasp, she looks up quickly and doesn’t know if she should feel shocked that he’s crying or a feeling of relief that he’s finally letting out his emotions. Danneel can recognize the face on Jared that he’s producing, the face that Jensen had dubbed his lying face and she has to give him a look of reproach, has to give him a glare and somehow convey that she is in no way in hell going to allow Jared to lie to her - especially about this.
“Jared, the truth, please. We both know I heard what I heard, but I need an explanation,” She states, gasps breaking her sentence as she truly thinks about the fact that if what Danneel had overheard is true, then she might just break, might just want to do something rash and harming to her friendships. She sees Jared sigh and look down again before he bites his lip and when Jared looks back up, he’s full out crying by now, nerve wrecking sobs that hurt Danneel’s heart and causes her to pull Jared towards her into an open hug. They’re both sobbing now, Jared because of the fact that without a doubt, he’s going to have to remember one of his worst memories, one the reasons why he ended up in the hospital. Danneel’s crying because Jared’s pain is her pain and she’s been through so much with the younger man that she met through Jensen.
“Jared, god Jared, what’s wrong? What the fuck happened?” Danneel sobs holding onto Jared tighter, him grasping her for dear life.
“It happened about two weeks before I walked in on Jensen cheating.” Jared begins and Danneel tenses needing to hear this but not wanting to at all. She pulls back, jumping onto one of the counters and pulling Jared through the v of her legs, putting their foreheads together. To an outsiders point of view, an outsider that didn’t know any of them, it would have appeared like a very intimate embrace, except to any one of their friends, they would know instantly that the embrace was only an act of comfort, an act of solitude that Jared definitely needs.
“It happened about two weeks before I walked in on Jensen cheating, and I was unloading groceries from the car while Jensen was out. I could feel someone watching me and before I could turn around, I was pushed against the car, my pants were ripped off -“ Jared chokes off, sobs breaking through his monologue and burying himself deeper into his pain - “I was raped from behind, and I fucking hated it, Dani. The guy, the fucking guy thought he could go unknown, but I saw him through the window of the car Danneel and-“ Jared breaks off again, sliding down the counter. While he does that, Danneel jumps off of the counter and sits next to him, taking his hands into hers and rubbing them gently. She’s sobbing just as much as Jared is, her face a mess of tears and liquids and she realizes that she’s begging for Jared to tell her who did such a foul thing, tell her now damn it cause she’d find the bastard and wring his neck for hurting Jared, for starting the beginnings of his pain.
“Jare, please -“ She’s interrupted by Jared, who’s biting his lip and squeezing tightly.
“I saw him through the window of the car Danneel, and two fucking weeks later, he was in my living room, fucking my boyfriend, who was enjoying it.” Jared bursts out, sobs wracking his whole body. Danneel tenses, her face goes white as a ghost and she can feel the anger boiling in her stomach, rising all the way to her throat like bile that wants to be spat out. She swallows it down and holds her friend tighter, feeling her heart clench at the fact that it was Jeff that started this whole fucking mess, Jeff that broke Jared so horribly, Jeff that made Jared end up in the hospital, alone, scared, and fucking heartbroken.
“Bastard,” She cries holding onto him tightly, crying. Never letting go of another, they stay that way for hours.
-----
Jared’s sitting at the counter in the kitchen, Danneel long gone and the pain he was feeling about his rape still fresh in his mind, still clearly hurting his heart. He sighs, taking another gulp of his beer, even though he really shouldn’t be drinking right now. He can still remember that night exceptionally well, and his talk with Danneel definitely did not help his memories. He bites his lip and groans, banging his head on the counter in annoyance.
“Why are you doing that?” Jared glances up to see Misha standing there with a smirk on his face, his body aligned with the wall, his hip jutting out and his arms crossed against his chest. Jared looks up and down Misha’s body and while he can appreciate what he sees he’s in no mood for anything relative sex related tonight. However, when he gets his sight up to Misha’s face, he can tell that Misha is and Jared sighs, knowing he’ll go through with it because he likes making people happy. it’s who he is, always making people happy, even if it’s something Jared doesn’t want to do.
“Because I want to Misha,” He replies, standing up and walking towards the fridge, and searching through its insides, hoping he can find something to eat that will be quick, but it seems to not be working. Sighing, Jared turns back around and notices that Misha is incredibly close to him now and he’s feeling kind of claustrophobic but takes a deep breath and angles his body away slightly.
“So, what do you want Misha?” Jared asks going to sit at the counter one more time and finishing his beer bottle and then opening a new one that he grabbed before Misha came along. He notices that Misha is close to him again and he’s feeling creeped out once more and takes a deep gulp before taking a long swig of his beer, finishing the first half rather quickly.
“You.” Misha replies and he says it so easily that Jared has to stumble back in shock, dropping his beer bottle as Misha allows himself to go closer to Jared’s body. Jared realizes that Misha has his hands on his hips, his thumbs stroking the hip bone. Jared gulps, can feel his dick hardening. He doesn’t normally get hard like this, but he’s always associated that kind of movement with love and romance and he hasn’t felt something like that in so god damn long.
“Misha, what are you doing?” He groans, biting his lip and trying so hard not to like how that feels on his skin. His cock his hard now, straining against his jeans and he can feel Misha holding their bodies together, can feel Misha’s own dick, hard and thick, through his jeans. Jared looks up and down Misha’s body and next thing he knows, Misha’s lips are on his own and his tongue is pushing open his mouth and Jared lets it, Jared accepts it even though he just wants Jensen’s mouth on his. However, he’s seen Misha eyeing him, seen it all week, so he might as well use it to his advantage.
He tilts his head up, let’s Misha kiss his way down his neck and can feel the beginnings of a hickey forming, and he’s not too comfortable with someone other than Jensen marking him up, but he’ll allow it to happen. He always allows things to happen. He sighs, angles his head one more time before he finds himself being pushed up against the counter and having Misha place himself between the V of his legs and Jared can feel his hardness get harder and harder and seriously what the fuck.
His hands are on Misha and they feel foreign, but they’re roaming Misha’s body, liking what they can feel and god, Jared’s moaning and he hasn’t felt this good in so long, and seriously, fuck, so good.
“Misha,” He moans, squeezing the guy and Misha, who squeezes back and then has his hands on Jared’s dick, squeezing it hard and making Jared gasp and arch into it. His buttons are being popped open and Misha is skimming the area around his dick, causing Jared to pant with lust and want, which he hasn’t let himself feel in a long time.
“God Misha, stop fucking teasing,” he gasps, his eyes opened wide, completely dilated and all he wants is to have himself fucked, have someone’s cock in his ass again. He’s whimpering, god he’s fucking whimpering and he knows instantly that Misha is grinning, swiftly pulling his pants completely down and shoving him so that his ass is straight-lined with Misha’s cock. His head falls backwards onto Misha’s shoulder and he can feel Misha kissing him, can feel the hardened length of Misha’s cock and god, he just. Fuck.
“Misha, in my ass, now.” Jared growls, and he hears Misha chuckle, grins at the free-falling he feels right now, even though he doesn’t know why he’s feeling like this, with Misha, right now. He shakes his head, lets himself stop thinking and aligns his ass with Misha’s, can feel Misha’s length gently enter into him and damn if that isn’t shocking.
After a few minutes, Misha begins moving, thrusting slow then fast then back to slow again, hitting Jared’s prostate every few thrusts, making him beg for it each time he doesn’t hit it. Jared can feel sweat on his brow and his thighs are starting to cramp.
“God, Misha,” he groans, his head thrust back as his balls tighten. His eyes are open and out of his periphery he can see Tom hiding behind the door, watching in rapt fascination and he wonders if Tom is enjoying the view. Pretty quickly, Jared’s balls tighten and cum squirts out his slit, the slapping of Misha’s cock on his skin continuing the release. He can feel Misha’s orgasm in him and damn if it isn’t hot. When Misha’s gone, he looks straight at Tom.
-----
Tom is looking at Jared, his eyes wide open and shock pouring through him in waves that cause Jared to grin. He’s on a high, a high he hasn’t felt in so long and god help him if he wants to use that for the fucking best. Jared walks towards Tom with a grin on his face, and when Tom’s eyes widen even more than before, Jared inwardly grins again, especially once Tom backs away.
“How about one last go at it, Tommy?” Jared grins and Tom looks down at his lips, eyes going wide one more time. Jared knows his cock is hard again, also knows that Tom is looking pretty hard himself. Sure, Tom is liking Mike right now, and sure, they’re pretty close to getting together but he knows Mike and Tom, knows that none of them care. And that’s perfectly fine with Jared, because he’s just going to fuck his way through life, make sure that he never feels anything ever again because let’s face it, feeling? Feeling is fucking underrated.
“Come on, Tom. We both know you want it. We both know I want it. So let’s just... go at it, even if it’ll be our first time.” He knows it won’t really be their first time, maybe it will be if there’s penetration but Jared doesn’t think that’ll happen, just some good old blowjobs and fingering. He sees Tom bite his lip and look down and he remembers why he decided to go out with Tom in the first place. At that thought, Jared slows himself and takes away his really creepy smile and shows a soft one and he immediately notices how Tom relaxes instantly.
“Tom, what happened to us?” Jared questions, going in and putting his arms around his ex-boyfriend, letting himself be wrapped in the shorter man. Tom smiles and leans back into him and Jared can hear him mumble that he doesn’t know, but they should just have sex anyways. This causes Jared to snort and laugh, and next thing he knows, he’s kissing his ex-boyfriend and then pushing him backwards and lifting him up onto the counter. Tom is moaning like a whore right now and Jared’s grinning about this all, and zipping down Tom’s pants, grinning when he learns that his ex-boyfriend is going commando.
“Damn, Tom,” Jared moans before going down on him, licking the underside of Tom’s cock. He can suddenly feel a hand on his own dick, right through his jeans and it’s such nice friction that Jared groans and arches into the hand. He moves faster with his mouth, his tongue going right through the slit and licking it rough and hard, causing Tom to arch into him and quicken his hand. Within minutes they’re both orgasming, sheets of white come shooting out of their dicks, Jared’s soaking through his jeans and isn’t that just ironic. Once they’ve settled down, Jared has to get this out.
“Go find Mike, Tom. Let him love you.”
---
Next Chapter
Author: jamie_love13
Beta-Edited: Madison, but not for this chapter
Pairings/Characters: Attempted Sandy/Jared, Past Jeff/Jared, Misha/Jared, Tom/Jared, Mike/Tom
Word Count: 4,500 Words
Rating: NC-17
Summary: Jared admits to why he was in the hospital and then takes out his emotions by screwing.
Disclaimer: Definitely don't own.
Warnings: Mentions of rape, guys. Slutty!Jared, but he's pretty depressed right now.
Notes: Wow, two chapters in two days. Enjoy this one. Next chapter's going to be dark and then the next one even darker. It's climax time, folks ;)
Previous Post | Masterpost
The bass is thumping, the walls reverberating with the noise that they cause, and Jensen looks around, can see the party going into full throttle party mode. He sees Mike and Jared together with Tom and Misha across from them, smoking on what no doubtedly could be a joint, which just makes Jensen snort because since when does Jared willingly smoke pot unless he isn’t already completely trashed?
The room Jensen’s in is crowded, bodies pressing against each other, heat blanketing one another with extremity. Jensen just wants to go outside and into the cool air but doing so would put him right by Jared’s view and he wants to be the one watching, wants to be the one observing Jared, seeing what’s changed between the younger man. At the same time though, Jensen wants to piss the younger man off, wants to push his buttons the only way he can, because he sure as hell can’t fuck Jared like he use to, though he definitely fucking wants to.
He can hear Jared’s laughter from where he is, and his heart just clenches at the familiar noise, so he turns away from anything Jared related - which isn’t as easy as you’d think it’d be - and looks out at the stars, gulping back his whiskey in one long drink. He can still feel his ex-boyfriend though, can feel the heat of his stare and just knows that Jared keeps looking at him and god he wants to look back, but he’s not going to, won’t cave in to that kind of pressure, not right now.
His glass is empty now and he hates this, hates having his every fucking move be dictated by his heart. Sighing angrily, Jensen stands up, a little wobbly, and makes his way towards the kitchen, where all the good fucking alcohol is, ignoring the feeling his stomach makes when he thinks about how close to Jared he’ll be. He can see Chris in the kitchen, heads towards him, keeping very clear of Jared, his emotions and any thought processes that come with that kind of emotional impact.
Once he gets to Chris, he can see all of the whiskey, bourbon and tequila bottles and grabs a tequila bottle, gulping it from the bottle, chugging it down quickly. He notices Chris grin at him and grins back, realizing some of the alcohol is dripping down his chin and laughs, wiping it off of said chin and holding his sides. Chris is wearing a cowboy hat, towing off his boots, brand new and no doubt killing him. Jensen has to roll his eyes, snorting. You can take the cowboy out of Texas and all that shit, but Chris just takes it to the fucking extreme at times. He grins, takes a shot of bourbon and feels it slide down his throat, smooth and easy and fucking just what he needs at this moment.
“Sup, man?!” Jensen laughs, getting another shot of something, doesn’t know what, doesn’t want to know what either. He can see Jared pass around the joint and he wants - itches for one right now, and he sees Chris look over at jared and smirk at Jensen.
“Yo, Jay!” Chris shouts and Jensen freezes, especially when he notices that Jared is too high enough to care that he’s coming towards Jensen, openly grinning and laughing and generally having a good time. Jensen can’t help but notice at that point in time that Jared hasn’t been this happy at all this summer, and well, it hurts, definitely. Jensen bites his lip, looking up and down Jared, grinning.
Looking over at Jared, Chris can’t help but notice how much pain the younger man is in. He knows instantly that Jared is masking the pain by smoking more, drinking more and having a hell of a lot more sex than normal, trying hard to mask his pain that Jensen had caused him over the past year. And he also knows that even being close to the other man is killing Jared, killing him well enough that he shouldn’t be anywhere near here, but yet, he is, because he feels like Jensen’s gotten over him, that he should get over Jensen but can’t. So day after day, Chris sees Jared put on a brave fucking face and move on forward, trying so hard not to let himself get caught up in everything Jensen. Chris sees Jared’s eyes flicker towards Jensen before getting a little hurt into them and then a little coldness into them.
Chris sighs, feeling his heart clench for Jared before looking over at Jensen and seeing the exact same look in Jensen’s eyes, except, anger there too which just doesn’t make sense because Jensen wasn’t the one that got hurt here, and that kind of pisses Chris off but he masks that anger and takes another swig from the whiskey bottle, looking back over to Jared and grinning.
“We need to get crazy drunk, Jay.” Chris nearly screams to allow Jared to hear him over the thump of the bass from the music, the clang of the guitar strings and Chris sees Jared grin before flopping down onto the ground in front of him, stretching his body out and flopping his head forehead like a little hyperactive puppy would do.
Chris grins before giving the bottle in his hands to Jared and another to Jensen who’s been frozen , staring at Jared the whole time and Chris has to chuckle at that.
“Jay?” He hears Jensen whisper and the two of them both look over at Jensen, who looks absolutely shocked that he even said Jared’s nickname out loud, and bites his lip, looking down before walking away quickly, not looking at Jared. Chris looks back at Jared, sees that Jared is silently crying now, biting his own lip and watching Jensen leave him, again, fingering the ring on a chain that no one but him and the ladies know about, the ring that Jared bought Jensen.
------
Sandy watched as Jensen walked away from Jared, watched as Jared’s heart broke once again because of that foolish, idiotic fucking man that Jared ‘loved’. Sandy didn’t know how to feel about Jared’s feelings towards Jensen, but what she did know was that Jared had fucked Genevieve, had fucked a woman, which mean Sandy still definitely had a chance with the attractive man. She bites her lip before deciding to just fuck it and try her hand at seducing the poor, broken Jared. She gets up off the wall and begins walking slowly towards the other man, nearly like she’s stalking her pray. She looks Jared up and down, admiring his features and his body. Sandy hasn’t seen an attractive man like Jared in such a long time, and she needs to know what the guy is like in bed, needs to know if he’s as rough as he seems to be.
When she finally arrives to where Jared is sitting with Chris, she looks him up and down one more time before her gaze quickly slide towards Chris, attractive enough and she’s shocked to see that he’s glaring at her, almost like she’s being calculated and he isn’t exactly thrilled with what she’s planning on doing. She’s tense now, on the defence but still trying to look extremely attractive.
“Hi Jared,” she says, twirling her hair around her finger, arching her body towards the younger man and giving him a smile that would usually have a guy eating out of her palm or, ahem, other things. She grins at that thought and leans towards Jared with her body, running her finger down his chest now that she’s next to him on the ground.
“Uhm, hi Sandy?” Jared replies, a question in his voice as she watches him gulp down his confusion. She can hear Chris growl and she doesn’t care, has only eyes for Jared at this moment. Jared looks adorable, his confusion clear and Sandy giggles, leaning closer to Jared and looking at his lips, licking her own.
She giggles, leaning into Jared’s space and whispering into his ear, “Do you wanna go somewhere?” She looks at Jared afterwards, sees his eyes go up and she giggles again, no doubt a little a drunk.
“Uhm, no.” Jared replies and Sandy really wants to hear a question in that answer so she leans closer to him, wrapping her legs around his body and arching into his groin. He arches into it even though she looks completely confused and is trying to push Sandy away.
“Sandy, I’m not interested,” He says, trying his hardest to push the girl off but she clenches tighter, and she kisses him, pushing his pants down lower on his groin.
“Sandy, no!” He says causing a few people to look around and stare at them questioningly. Sandy just giggles at them, telling them he loves roleplay. Sandy’s thankful that Chris had gotten up and left, and thrusts into Jared, can feel him hardening underneath her body. She moans at the contact, throwing her head back as she does so.
Her eyes flutters and she forces them open, looks around the room and notices how empty it is and she grins at that, looking down at Jared once more. She knows, recognizes the fact that he’s said no, and she’s definitely not some kind of rapist, though she understands that she’s very close to appearing to be crossing that line right now. She leans her body down into his, and starts thrusting with their clothes still on. She knows nothing will happen with Jared, but she sure as hell can play it up a little.
“Oh god, yeah,” She moans, her head thrown back and her eyes closed, blocking out all light and sounds from the party surrounding her. She can feel her orgasm coming, and isn’t that just an hilarious thing, having an orgasm without even being penetrated. She giggles at the thought, her mouth open in a wide ‘O’ and she realizes that Jared’s eyes are closed and his face is tense.
Sandy looks closer at the other man, can see that he’s in pain and she doesn’t know what to do about that, doesn’t know why he’d be in pain.
“Sandy, off,” he says and Sandy jumps off, her eyes wide with shock and possibly, fear. Her lip quivers and she knows she shouldn’t cry but there’s something wrong with Jared, something no one knows about, something unrelated to Jensen, and that thought scares Sandy completely.
“Jared, whaa- what happened? God, I’m so sorry.” She says, tears spilling out of her eyes and her body turning away from the other man, but unable to, as she feels his hand on her arm.
“Sorry, Jared.” She replies, and he shakes his head, tears coming down silently.
“No one knows, Sandy. No one. Sometimes I just want it all to end, want all of the pain to leave me the fuck alone,” He cries and Sandy goes towards him, taking him into her arms and hugging him. She can feel Jared crying in her arms, and it just hurts her completely.
“I’m so -“
“No. No, Sandy, don’t you dare fucking pity me. I don’t need pity. I was raped. I know, I understand, I accept, and some days, I’ve moved on from it. Most days though, I’m just so fucking depressed Sandy, trying so hard to fight against all of this pain, the pain Jensen caused me, the pain this random rapist caused me. Just... all of this pain, it’s so fucking exhausting. It’s why I -“ Jared cuts himself off there, taking a gulp of air and looking past Sandy to see Danneel there, her mouth open in shock, tears streaming down her face.
“Danneel,” Sandy hears Jared say and she turns around, tries to see what Jared sees, and she knows, instantly, that all of this is going to cause a whole lot of pain to come out of everyone - too much.
-----
She’s standing at the top of the stairs that lead into the living room, can feel her eyes up in her hairline and her heart beating erratically, her face turning a bright shade of red. Danneel bites her lips and looks at Jared before nodding her head towards the kitchen, wanting to talk to him privately about what she had just heard. It’s then that she turns towards the kitchen, her back towards her best friend, unable to look at him without bursting into tears. She can feel the water in her eyes and tries her hardest to blink them away, rubbing at them with the inside of her hand. When she finally gets to the kitchen, she waits for Jared and when he enters, closing the door behind him, she tenses her body up, ready to fight even though she has no idea why.
Whatever it is that Danneel is feeling is unceremonious, definitely not wanted or needed and definitely not the way she actual feels. She has a feeling that things are going to go bad, that whatever it is that’s going to happen in the next couple of weeks, it isn’t going to end well at all.
“Dani, what’s wrong?” Danneel looks up, can see Jared’s look of confusion on his face, clear and bright as day as any other emotion that Jared tends to wear on his face. Danneel looks down at her feet, biting her lip and trying to stop the tears from falling out of her eyes, stop them from unleashing whatever kind of waterfall from underneath those lids.
“Jared, what happened?” She questions, and she still has to look at her feet but she knows that Jared’s biting his own lip, looking at his own feet and when she hears him gasp, she looks up quickly and doesn’t know if she should feel shocked that he’s crying or a feeling of relief that he’s finally letting out his emotions. Danneel can recognize the face on Jared that he’s producing, the face that Jensen had dubbed his lying face and she has to give him a look of reproach, has to give him a glare and somehow convey that she is in no way in hell going to allow Jared to lie to her - especially about this.
“Jared, the truth, please. We both know I heard what I heard, but I need an explanation,” She states, gasps breaking her sentence as she truly thinks about the fact that if what Danneel had overheard is true, then she might just break, might just want to do something rash and harming to her friendships. She sees Jared sigh and look down again before he bites his lip and when Jared looks back up, he’s full out crying by now, nerve wrecking sobs that hurt Danneel’s heart and causes her to pull Jared towards her into an open hug. They’re both sobbing now, Jared because of the fact that without a doubt, he’s going to have to remember one of his worst memories, one the reasons why he ended up in the hospital. Danneel’s crying because Jared’s pain is her pain and she’s been through so much with the younger man that she met through Jensen.
“Jared, god Jared, what’s wrong? What the fuck happened?” Danneel sobs holding onto Jared tighter, him grasping her for dear life.
“It happened about two weeks before I walked in on Jensen cheating.” Jared begins and Danneel tenses needing to hear this but not wanting to at all. She pulls back, jumping onto one of the counters and pulling Jared through the v of her legs, putting their foreheads together. To an outsiders point of view, an outsider that didn’t know any of them, it would have appeared like a very intimate embrace, except to any one of their friends, they would know instantly that the embrace was only an act of comfort, an act of solitude that Jared definitely needs.
“It happened about two weeks before I walked in on Jensen cheating, and I was unloading groceries from the car while Jensen was out. I could feel someone watching me and before I could turn around, I was pushed against the car, my pants were ripped off -“ Jared chokes off, sobs breaking through his monologue and burying himself deeper into his pain - “I was raped from behind, and I fucking hated it, Dani. The guy, the fucking guy thought he could go unknown, but I saw him through the window of the car Danneel and-“ Jared breaks off again, sliding down the counter. While he does that, Danneel jumps off of the counter and sits next to him, taking his hands into hers and rubbing them gently. She’s sobbing just as much as Jared is, her face a mess of tears and liquids and she realizes that she’s begging for Jared to tell her who did such a foul thing, tell her now damn it cause she’d find the bastard and wring his neck for hurting Jared, for starting the beginnings of his pain.
“Jare, please -“ She’s interrupted by Jared, who’s biting his lip and squeezing tightly.
“I saw him through the window of the car Danneel, and two fucking weeks later, he was in my living room, fucking my boyfriend, who was enjoying it.” Jared bursts out, sobs wracking his whole body. Danneel tenses, her face goes white as a ghost and she can feel the anger boiling in her stomach, rising all the way to her throat like bile that wants to be spat out. She swallows it down and holds her friend tighter, feeling her heart clench at the fact that it was Jeff that started this whole fucking mess, Jeff that broke Jared so horribly, Jeff that made Jared end up in the hospital, alone, scared, and fucking heartbroken.
“Bastard,” She cries holding onto him tightly, crying. Never letting go of another, they stay that way for hours.
-----
Jared’s sitting at the counter in the kitchen, Danneel long gone and the pain he was feeling about his rape still fresh in his mind, still clearly hurting his heart. He sighs, taking another gulp of his beer, even though he really shouldn’t be drinking right now. He can still remember that night exceptionally well, and his talk with Danneel definitely did not help his memories. He bites his lip and groans, banging his head on the counter in annoyance.
“Why are you doing that?” Jared glances up to see Misha standing there with a smirk on his face, his body aligned with the wall, his hip jutting out and his arms crossed against his chest. Jared looks up and down Misha’s body and while he can appreciate what he sees he’s in no mood for anything relative sex related tonight. However, when he gets his sight up to Misha’s face, he can tell that Misha is and Jared sighs, knowing he’ll go through with it because he likes making people happy. it’s who he is, always making people happy, even if it’s something Jared doesn’t want to do.
“Because I want to Misha,” He replies, standing up and walking towards the fridge, and searching through its insides, hoping he can find something to eat that will be quick, but it seems to not be working. Sighing, Jared turns back around and notices that Misha is incredibly close to him now and he’s feeling kind of claustrophobic but takes a deep breath and angles his body away slightly.
“So, what do you want Misha?” Jared asks going to sit at the counter one more time and finishing his beer bottle and then opening a new one that he grabbed before Misha came along. He notices that Misha is close to him again and he’s feeling creeped out once more and takes a deep gulp before taking a long swig of his beer, finishing the first half rather quickly.
“You.” Misha replies and he says it so easily that Jared has to stumble back in shock, dropping his beer bottle as Misha allows himself to go closer to Jared’s body. Jared realizes that Misha has his hands on his hips, his thumbs stroking the hip bone. Jared gulps, can feel his dick hardening. He doesn’t normally get hard like this, but he’s always associated that kind of movement with love and romance and he hasn’t felt something like that in so god damn long.
“Misha, what are you doing?” He groans, biting his lip and trying so hard not to like how that feels on his skin. His cock his hard now, straining against his jeans and he can feel Misha holding their bodies together, can feel Misha’s own dick, hard and thick, through his jeans. Jared looks up and down Misha’s body and next thing he knows, Misha’s lips are on his own and his tongue is pushing open his mouth and Jared lets it, Jared accepts it even though he just wants Jensen’s mouth on his. However, he’s seen Misha eyeing him, seen it all week, so he might as well use it to his advantage.
He tilts his head up, let’s Misha kiss his way down his neck and can feel the beginnings of a hickey forming, and he’s not too comfortable with someone other than Jensen marking him up, but he’ll allow it to happen. He always allows things to happen. He sighs, angles his head one more time before he finds himself being pushed up against the counter and having Misha place himself between the V of his legs and Jared can feel his hardness get harder and harder and seriously what the fuck.
His hands are on Misha and they feel foreign, but they’re roaming Misha’s body, liking what they can feel and god, Jared’s moaning and he hasn’t felt this good in so long, and seriously, fuck, so good.
“Misha,” He moans, squeezing the guy and Misha, who squeezes back and then has his hands on Jared’s dick, squeezing it hard and making Jared gasp and arch into it. His buttons are being popped open and Misha is skimming the area around his dick, causing Jared to pant with lust and want, which he hasn’t let himself feel in a long time.
“God Misha, stop fucking teasing,” he gasps, his eyes opened wide, completely dilated and all he wants is to have himself fucked, have someone’s cock in his ass again. He’s whimpering, god he’s fucking whimpering and he knows instantly that Misha is grinning, swiftly pulling his pants completely down and shoving him so that his ass is straight-lined with Misha’s cock. His head falls backwards onto Misha’s shoulder and he can feel Misha kissing him, can feel the hardened length of Misha’s cock and god, he just. Fuck.
“Misha, in my ass, now.” Jared growls, and he hears Misha chuckle, grins at the free-falling he feels right now, even though he doesn’t know why he’s feeling like this, with Misha, right now. He shakes his head, lets himself stop thinking and aligns his ass with Misha’s, can feel Misha’s length gently enter into him and damn if that isn’t shocking.
After a few minutes, Misha begins moving, thrusting slow then fast then back to slow again, hitting Jared’s prostate every few thrusts, making him beg for it each time he doesn’t hit it. Jared can feel sweat on his brow and his thighs are starting to cramp.
“God, Misha,” he groans, his head thrust back as his balls tighten. His eyes are open and out of his periphery he can see Tom hiding behind the door, watching in rapt fascination and he wonders if Tom is enjoying the view. Pretty quickly, Jared’s balls tighten and cum squirts out his slit, the slapping of Misha’s cock on his skin continuing the release. He can feel Misha’s orgasm in him and damn if it isn’t hot. When Misha’s gone, he looks straight at Tom.
-----
Tom is looking at Jared, his eyes wide open and shock pouring through him in waves that cause Jared to grin. He’s on a high, a high he hasn’t felt in so long and god help him if he wants to use that for the fucking best. Jared walks towards Tom with a grin on his face, and when Tom’s eyes widen even more than before, Jared inwardly grins again, especially once Tom backs away.
“How about one last go at it, Tommy?” Jared grins and Tom looks down at his lips, eyes going wide one more time. Jared knows his cock is hard again, also knows that Tom is looking pretty hard himself. Sure, Tom is liking Mike right now, and sure, they’re pretty close to getting together but he knows Mike and Tom, knows that none of them care. And that’s perfectly fine with Jared, because he’s just going to fuck his way through life, make sure that he never feels anything ever again because let’s face it, feeling? Feeling is fucking underrated.
“Come on, Tom. We both know you want it. We both know I want it. So let’s just... go at it, even if it’ll be our first time.” He knows it won’t really be their first time, maybe it will be if there’s penetration but Jared doesn’t think that’ll happen, just some good old blowjobs and fingering. He sees Tom bite his lip and look down and he remembers why he decided to go out with Tom in the first place. At that thought, Jared slows himself and takes away his really creepy smile and shows a soft one and he immediately notices how Tom relaxes instantly.
“Tom, what happened to us?” Jared questions, going in and putting his arms around his ex-boyfriend, letting himself be wrapped in the shorter man. Tom smiles and leans back into him and Jared can hear him mumble that he doesn’t know, but they should just have sex anyways. This causes Jared to snort and laugh, and next thing he knows, he’s kissing his ex-boyfriend and then pushing him backwards and lifting him up onto the counter. Tom is moaning like a whore right now and Jared’s grinning about this all, and zipping down Tom’s pants, grinning when he learns that his ex-boyfriend is going commando.
“Damn, Tom,” Jared moans before going down on him, licking the underside of Tom’s cock. He can suddenly feel a hand on his own dick, right through his jeans and it’s such nice friction that Jared groans and arches into the hand. He moves faster with his mouth, his tongue going right through the slit and licking it rough and hard, causing Tom to arch into him and quicken his hand. Within minutes they’re both orgasming, sheets of white come shooting out of their dicks, Jared’s soaking through his jeans and isn’t that just ironic. Once they’ve settled down, Jared has to get this out.
“Go find Mike, Tom. Let him love you.”
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