Seize the Day - NaNoWriMo Attempt - Chapter 19
Still in the mindset to change gears for a bit. And now, I think I know what I want to write for the time being. Or well, I know what wants to be written. Whether I really want to write it, well... That's something I'm unsure of. Either way, enjoy this chapter. :)
Previous Chapters:
1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18
“Right now, Dad?” Jazz asked, clearing his throat as he looked past his father and into the empty hallway. “Shouldn’t you be getting some rest? It’s your first full day back, isn’t it?”
“Rest can wait. May I...?”
“Of course,” Jazz murmured, stepping aside and letting his father inside his apartment. “What is it that you need to talk to me about?”
Jazz watched as his father stepped inside his apartment, his eyes sweeping the room for a moment before settling on the couch. Slowly, Casio sat down, folding one leg on top of the other as he relaxed against the cushions. As he made himself comfortable, Jazz crossed his arms loosely over his chest and remained standing by the door, trying to keep himself from pursing his lips together.
“I wanted to speak to you about the Western Colonies,” Casio said once he seemed to get comfortable. He propped his chin up with his hand, one finger tapping against his cheek and his elbow resting on the arm of the couch. Jazz felt his shoulders tense, his neck stiffening as his father didn’t quite look him in the eye. “I don’t suppose Foraker has already spoken to you about them, has he?”
“He has,” Jazz said, cautiously letting the words slip past his lips. “I just got back from a meeting with him about them, in fact.” He paused, frowning slightly to himself. “Why?”
“Did he inform you that they’re already developing those trade routes you suggested?” Casio asked, his eyes meeting Jazz’s briefly. “Laquesha Smith was quite taken with your idea. She seemed rather impressed with you in general, when I spoke with her myself.”
Jazz nodded, feeling his jaw clench some as his nails dug into his skin through the fabric of his shirt. His couldn’t help noticing that his father was still wearing one of his customary suits. It was as though his father lived in them -- same with Mitchel. Jazz, on the other hand, had changed into a relaxed pair of jeans and a dark blue t-shirt, once he had gotten off the phone with Savin. “Isn’t that why I’m becoming the new contact between the Empire and the Western Colonies?” Jazz asked, trying to keep his expression as neutral as possible.
“That’s -- part of it, yes,” Casio murmured, lowering his hand so that it rested comfortably along the arm of the couch. Casio’s fingers traced the patterns in the couch’s design, his eyes focused on those for a moment before he looked up at his son again. “Jasper, you’re twenty-five. I think, perhaps, it’s time for you to start considering settling down with a woman.”
“I’m gay,” Jazz said through clenched teeth. “Dad, we’ve had this discussion a thousand times before. It always ends the same way and I’m not in the mood to be having it now. Please -- just leave, and save us both the trouble, alright?”
“I don’t understand why this is so difficult for you,” Casio muttered, shaking his head. “I am not asking you to fall in love with a woman. I am simply asking you to choose one, marry her, and produce at least one child together --”
“Producing a child means having sex with a woman -- and I am not sexually attracted to women, Dad. How hard is that for you understand?” Jazz growled, narrowing his eyes at his father. “Not to mention you’re asking me to lie to a girl -- or to straight up tell her that I’ll never actually love her and that I’ll always be looking outside the marriage for sexual and emotional fulfillment. How the hell is that fair to her? How does that make me a better Emperor, when the time comes?”
“It guarantees that the Empire remains within the family --”
“Are the Callahans so arrogant that we can’t let any other families have the Empire, should it come down to that?” Jazz asked, his brow bunching together in anger and confusion. “I have cousins, don’t I? Or you do, don’t you? The Empire will still remain with the family, one way or another --”
“They are not fit to run the Empire, Jasper,” Casio said, his voice strong and harsh. “They all have shirked their duties, just as you tried to do. As far as I’m concerned, they do not exist.”
“Then my Council can always elect a new Emperor, should it come to that! I am not marrying some random woman and having a child with her. I don’t want to keep my sexuality a secret from the people -- same-sex couples have been allowed to marry for decades, Dad. Why can’t I just be myself, like the rest of our people?” Jazz countered, tears stinging at his eyes. He drew in a deep breath, trying to settle the anger burning in his chest, closing his eyes for a moment and running his fingers through his hair.
“Aside from Councilor Foraker, I have yet to see you commit to a man for longer than a week or so,” Casio muttered. “Should the media ever find out about your promiscuous ways -- not to mention all of the sneaking out of the Palace you’ve done? The public would never trust you again. The appearance of loyalty --”
“How do you think the media would spin things, if I married a woman and it was discovered I had a string of male lovers on the side, Dad?” Jazz asked, interrupting his father. He still spoke through gritted teeth, his jaw clenching once again. “How is that any better? How is that not worse?”
Casio didn’t seem to have a response to that, his lips pressed together into a thin, white line. He then looked away from Jazz and gave a slight shake of his head. “Laquesha has already spoken to me about accepting a marriage with you,” he said, his words quiet, but even, as he spoke. He continued to avoid Jazz’s eyes. “The offer has a time limit, however.”
“How much time?” Jazz asked, his voice wavering. “And what are the consequences, if I don’t agree to it?”
“I’m not sure what the consequences are,” Casio answered, his lips twisting into a slight frown. “The time-fame is six months.”
Jazz nodded, his whole body aching from how rigid he held himself, nails still threatening to break through the skin of his upper arms. “I have a boyfriend,” he said after choosing his words carefully. “I can’t accept Miss Smith’s offer.”
Casio furrowed his brow. “Since when?” he asked, anger lacing his voice. “I know you and Foraker have broken up -- and that’s only been for a month or two at the most. So if you do have a new lover by now, you couldn’t have been dating him for very long. Break it off.”
“No.” Jazz lifted his chin, standing up as straight as he could to his full height, despite his father still sitting on the couch. He opened his mouth to continue speaking, but a sharp knock on the door cut off his words. Jazz’s heart sank in his chest, his stomach plummeting to the floor.
“Aren’t you going to get that?” Casio murmured once the knock repeated itself. “I can wait here while you send whoever it is away, so we can continue our discussion.”
Jazz swallowed thickly. “If it’s who I think it is -- then I’m not sending him away. And it doesn’t matter, anyway. I’m not marrying Laquesha Smith and that’s final. So please, leave, Dad. I won’t ask you again,” he said softly. He then turned on his heel and headed back towards the door, opening it quickly.
Savin stood on the other side of the door, his smile fading quickly from his face as he took one look at Jazz. “What’s wrong?” he asked, concern lacing his voice as his eyebrows bunched together. “You look like you’re about to --”
“Prince Jasper and I were just having a personal discussion, Dr. Bates,” Casio said, his voice booming over Jazz’s shoulder. In the time it had taken for Jazz to open the door, he had gotten up from the couch and closed the distance between himself and Jazz. Jazz glared at him over his shoulder, his arms crossing over his chest yet again. If Casio had caught on to Savin’s relationship with Jazz, he made no indication of it as he continued to speak. “If you’ll excuse us to finish our conversation --”
“I already said that the conversation was over, Dad,” Jazz said, managing to keep his voice tightly controlled. “There’s nothing more to discuss.”
Savin’s eyes widened as he glanced back and forth between Jazz and Casio, an expression of uncertainty crossing his face. “I can always come back later,” he murmured, dropping his voice so only Jazz could hear him.
“No, Savin, it’s fine,” Jazz said, stepping away from the door and gesturing with a wide sweep of his arm for Savin to come in. Savin frowned, but stepped inside Jazz’s apartment anyway as Jazz said, “My dad was just leaving.”
Casio pursed his lips together, his own jaw clenching at Jazz’s words. Jazz continued to glare at him, daring at his father to stay, when finally, Casio made his way out of Jazz’s apartment. “We’re not done with this discussion, Jasper,” he said as Jazz put his hand back on the door.
“As far as I’m concerned, we are,” Jazz growled back, shutting the door behind his father. Tears threatened to spill over once again, and he shook his head as anger caused his shoulders to tremble. He whimpered as he felt Savin placed a hand on his shoulder and squeezed.
“What did the two of you talk about?” Savin asked, his voice hardly louder than a whisper as he then wrapped his arms around Jazz, hugging him from behind. Jazz leaned his head against the door, tears rolling down his cheeks as his breath caught in his throat. He then turned around in Savin’s arms, burying his head in Savin’s shoulder as he began to cry freely. “Jazz -- what’s wrong?”
Jazz shook his head, unable to force the words past his lips as he clung to Savin even harder. “N-Nothing,” he managed through quiet sobs. “Don’t wanna -- don’t wanna talk about it.”
Jazz felt Savin nod. “He knows about us, doesn’t he?” he asked quietly, hugging Jazz to him. He traced small circles into Jazz’s back and shoulders.
“He knows I have a boyfriend,” Jazz answered, sniffing. He relaxed against Savin, even smiling slightly to himself as he felt Savin press a quick kiss to his temple. “He -- might have put two and two together, I guess. I dunno.”
Savin nodded again, this time pulling away from Jazz slightly and tilting Jazz’s chin back so that the two could look one another in the eye. “Well, I guess there’s no more need to keep our relationship a secret then, is there?” he asked, giving Jazz a quiet smile. He brushed some of Jazz’s tears away with his thumb. “Look, you don’t need to tell me what you and your dad were talking about -- but I do want you to know that I’m here for you, no matter what, okay? And that you can confide in me about this sort of thing, if you need to.”
Jazz nodded, sniffing once again and willing himself to take in a deep breath in order to steady himself. He closed his eyes, enjoying the warmth of Savin’s hand against his cheek. “I’ll -- tell you later,” he said with a heavy sigh. He forced himself to smile at Savin. “Let me -- get dressed in something a little more presentable, and then we can go buy what we need for you to make us dinner, okay?”
Savin smiled back before leaning in and pressing his lips against Jazz’s own. “Sounds like a plan to me,” he said as he pulled away. “If it’ll keep your mind off things, then it’s a good plan.”
Jazz smiled again, this time no longer having to force it. “Yeah,” he murmured, resting his hands on Savin’s chest. “Let me just -- call the Guard and let them know I’m going out, and that we want them to be discreet.”
“Okay.” Savin moved away from Jazz and settled himself onto the couch. “I’ll be waiting.”
Jazz nodded, wiping the rest of his tears away and taking in another deep breath. As he pulled out his phone, he couldn’t help but notice how Savin seemed to watch his every move. How Savin looked at him in ways Mitchel never seemed to.
Like hell was he going to marry Laquesha.
Next Chapter
Previous Chapters:
1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18
“Right now, Dad?” Jazz asked, clearing his throat as he looked past his father and into the empty hallway. “Shouldn’t you be getting some rest? It’s your first full day back, isn’t it?”
“Rest can wait. May I...?”
“Of course,” Jazz murmured, stepping aside and letting his father inside his apartment. “What is it that you need to talk to me about?”
Jazz watched as his father stepped inside his apartment, his eyes sweeping the room for a moment before settling on the couch. Slowly, Casio sat down, folding one leg on top of the other as he relaxed against the cushions. As he made himself comfortable, Jazz crossed his arms loosely over his chest and remained standing by the door, trying to keep himself from pursing his lips together.
“I wanted to speak to you about the Western Colonies,” Casio said once he seemed to get comfortable. He propped his chin up with his hand, one finger tapping against his cheek and his elbow resting on the arm of the couch. Jazz felt his shoulders tense, his neck stiffening as his father didn’t quite look him in the eye. “I don’t suppose Foraker has already spoken to you about them, has he?”
“He has,” Jazz said, cautiously letting the words slip past his lips. “I just got back from a meeting with him about them, in fact.” He paused, frowning slightly to himself. “Why?”
“Did he inform you that they’re already developing those trade routes you suggested?” Casio asked, his eyes meeting Jazz’s briefly. “Laquesha Smith was quite taken with your idea. She seemed rather impressed with you in general, when I spoke with her myself.”
Jazz nodded, feeling his jaw clench some as his nails dug into his skin through the fabric of his shirt. His couldn’t help noticing that his father was still wearing one of his customary suits. It was as though his father lived in them -- same with Mitchel. Jazz, on the other hand, had changed into a relaxed pair of jeans and a dark blue t-shirt, once he had gotten off the phone with Savin. “Isn’t that why I’m becoming the new contact between the Empire and the Western Colonies?” Jazz asked, trying to keep his expression as neutral as possible.
“That’s -- part of it, yes,” Casio murmured, lowering his hand so that it rested comfortably along the arm of the couch. Casio’s fingers traced the patterns in the couch’s design, his eyes focused on those for a moment before he looked up at his son again. “Jasper, you’re twenty-five. I think, perhaps, it’s time for you to start considering settling down with a woman.”
“I’m gay,” Jazz said through clenched teeth. “Dad, we’ve had this discussion a thousand times before. It always ends the same way and I’m not in the mood to be having it now. Please -- just leave, and save us both the trouble, alright?”
“I don’t understand why this is so difficult for you,” Casio muttered, shaking his head. “I am not asking you to fall in love with a woman. I am simply asking you to choose one, marry her, and produce at least one child together --”
“Producing a child means having sex with a woman -- and I am not sexually attracted to women, Dad. How hard is that for you understand?” Jazz growled, narrowing his eyes at his father. “Not to mention you’re asking me to lie to a girl -- or to straight up tell her that I’ll never actually love her and that I’ll always be looking outside the marriage for sexual and emotional fulfillment. How the hell is that fair to her? How does that make me a better Emperor, when the time comes?”
“It guarantees that the Empire remains within the family --”
“Are the Callahans so arrogant that we can’t let any other families have the Empire, should it come down to that?” Jazz asked, his brow bunching together in anger and confusion. “I have cousins, don’t I? Or you do, don’t you? The Empire will still remain with the family, one way or another --”
“They are not fit to run the Empire, Jasper,” Casio said, his voice strong and harsh. “They all have shirked their duties, just as you tried to do. As far as I’m concerned, they do not exist.”
“Then my Council can always elect a new Emperor, should it come to that! I am not marrying some random woman and having a child with her. I don’t want to keep my sexuality a secret from the people -- same-sex couples have been allowed to marry for decades, Dad. Why can’t I just be myself, like the rest of our people?” Jazz countered, tears stinging at his eyes. He drew in a deep breath, trying to settle the anger burning in his chest, closing his eyes for a moment and running his fingers through his hair.
“Aside from Councilor Foraker, I have yet to see you commit to a man for longer than a week or so,” Casio muttered. “Should the media ever find out about your promiscuous ways -- not to mention all of the sneaking out of the Palace you’ve done? The public would never trust you again. The appearance of loyalty --”
“How do you think the media would spin things, if I married a woman and it was discovered I had a string of male lovers on the side, Dad?” Jazz asked, interrupting his father. He still spoke through gritted teeth, his jaw clenching once again. “How is that any better? How is that not worse?”
Casio didn’t seem to have a response to that, his lips pressed together into a thin, white line. He then looked away from Jazz and gave a slight shake of his head. “Laquesha has already spoken to me about accepting a marriage with you,” he said, his words quiet, but even, as he spoke. He continued to avoid Jazz’s eyes. “The offer has a time limit, however.”
“How much time?” Jazz asked, his voice wavering. “And what are the consequences, if I don’t agree to it?”
“I’m not sure what the consequences are,” Casio answered, his lips twisting into a slight frown. “The time-fame is six months.”
Jazz nodded, his whole body aching from how rigid he held himself, nails still threatening to break through the skin of his upper arms. “I have a boyfriend,” he said after choosing his words carefully. “I can’t accept Miss Smith’s offer.”
Casio furrowed his brow. “Since when?” he asked, anger lacing his voice. “I know you and Foraker have broken up -- and that’s only been for a month or two at the most. So if you do have a new lover by now, you couldn’t have been dating him for very long. Break it off.”
“No.” Jazz lifted his chin, standing up as straight as he could to his full height, despite his father still sitting on the couch. He opened his mouth to continue speaking, but a sharp knock on the door cut off his words. Jazz’s heart sank in his chest, his stomach plummeting to the floor.
“Aren’t you going to get that?” Casio murmured once the knock repeated itself. “I can wait here while you send whoever it is away, so we can continue our discussion.”
Jazz swallowed thickly. “If it’s who I think it is -- then I’m not sending him away. And it doesn’t matter, anyway. I’m not marrying Laquesha Smith and that’s final. So please, leave, Dad. I won’t ask you again,” he said softly. He then turned on his heel and headed back towards the door, opening it quickly.
Savin stood on the other side of the door, his smile fading quickly from his face as he took one look at Jazz. “What’s wrong?” he asked, concern lacing his voice as his eyebrows bunched together. “You look like you’re about to --”
“Prince Jasper and I were just having a personal discussion, Dr. Bates,” Casio said, his voice booming over Jazz’s shoulder. In the time it had taken for Jazz to open the door, he had gotten up from the couch and closed the distance between himself and Jazz. Jazz glared at him over his shoulder, his arms crossing over his chest yet again. If Casio had caught on to Savin’s relationship with Jazz, he made no indication of it as he continued to speak. “If you’ll excuse us to finish our conversation --”
“I already said that the conversation was over, Dad,” Jazz said, managing to keep his voice tightly controlled. “There’s nothing more to discuss.”
Savin’s eyes widened as he glanced back and forth between Jazz and Casio, an expression of uncertainty crossing his face. “I can always come back later,” he murmured, dropping his voice so only Jazz could hear him.
“No, Savin, it’s fine,” Jazz said, stepping away from the door and gesturing with a wide sweep of his arm for Savin to come in. Savin frowned, but stepped inside Jazz’s apartment anyway as Jazz said, “My dad was just leaving.”
Casio pursed his lips together, his own jaw clenching at Jazz’s words. Jazz continued to glare at him, daring at his father to stay, when finally, Casio made his way out of Jazz’s apartment. “We’re not done with this discussion, Jasper,” he said as Jazz put his hand back on the door.
“As far as I’m concerned, we are,” Jazz growled back, shutting the door behind his father. Tears threatened to spill over once again, and he shook his head as anger caused his shoulders to tremble. He whimpered as he felt Savin placed a hand on his shoulder and squeezed.
“What did the two of you talk about?” Savin asked, his voice hardly louder than a whisper as he then wrapped his arms around Jazz, hugging him from behind. Jazz leaned his head against the door, tears rolling down his cheeks as his breath caught in his throat. He then turned around in Savin’s arms, burying his head in Savin’s shoulder as he began to cry freely. “Jazz -- what’s wrong?”
Jazz shook his head, unable to force the words past his lips as he clung to Savin even harder. “N-Nothing,” he managed through quiet sobs. “Don’t wanna -- don’t wanna talk about it.”
Jazz felt Savin nod. “He knows about us, doesn’t he?” he asked quietly, hugging Jazz to him. He traced small circles into Jazz’s back and shoulders.
“He knows I have a boyfriend,” Jazz answered, sniffing. He relaxed against Savin, even smiling slightly to himself as he felt Savin press a quick kiss to his temple. “He -- might have put two and two together, I guess. I dunno.”
Savin nodded again, this time pulling away from Jazz slightly and tilting Jazz’s chin back so that the two could look one another in the eye. “Well, I guess there’s no more need to keep our relationship a secret then, is there?” he asked, giving Jazz a quiet smile. He brushed some of Jazz’s tears away with his thumb. “Look, you don’t need to tell me what you and your dad were talking about -- but I do want you to know that I’m here for you, no matter what, okay? And that you can confide in me about this sort of thing, if you need to.”
Jazz nodded, sniffing once again and willing himself to take in a deep breath in order to steady himself. He closed his eyes, enjoying the warmth of Savin’s hand against his cheek. “I’ll -- tell you later,” he said with a heavy sigh. He forced himself to smile at Savin. “Let me -- get dressed in something a little more presentable, and then we can go buy what we need for you to make us dinner, okay?”
Savin smiled back before leaning in and pressing his lips against Jazz’s own. “Sounds like a plan to me,” he said as he pulled away. “If it’ll keep your mind off things, then it’s a good plan.”
Jazz smiled again, this time no longer having to force it. “Yeah,” he murmured, resting his hands on Savin’s chest. “Let me just -- call the Guard and let them know I’m going out, and that we want them to be discreet.”
“Okay.” Savin moved away from Jazz and settled himself onto the couch. “I’ll be waiting.”
Jazz nodded, wiping the rest of his tears away and taking in another deep breath. As he pulled out his phone, he couldn’t help but notice how Savin seemed to watch his every move. How Savin looked at him in ways Mitchel never seemed to.
Like hell was he going to marry Laquesha.
Next Chapter