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Jul 04, 2005 12:47

I hate America. I want to get the hell out of here ( Read more... )

introspective crap, holly, america sucks, relationships, mike, insanity

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Comments 16

cerulean_me July 4 2005, 21:07:15 UTC
I have no idea if this well help- I hope so, but *shrug* here's to hoping...

Love is always going to end, one way, or another. All you can do is enjoy while it is yours. To worry incessently about it's end, it to force it a premature ending.

One of my favorite quotes:

"After all my erstwhile dear,
My no longer cherished,
Need we say it was not love,
Just because it perished?"
-Edna St. Vincent Millay

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cerulean_me July 4 2005, 21:11:10 UTC
Oh- and go! ;-)

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thedarkcrystal July 4 2005, 23:39:51 UTC
I'm seriously considering it. Why do you think I should?

Are you doing anything today?

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cerulean_me July 5 2005, 00:41:03 UTC
We're BBQing, then going to watch fireworks, but not sure where yet.

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(The comment has been removed)

thedarkcrystal July 4 2005, 23:35:02 UTC
I feel the same way. I think it was false strength though when I was younger. I think I'm just wiser now and seeing that things can get to me after all. Of course I'm still invincible ;) but I can get hurt and I can be set back.

Sometimes you need a change of scenery to see if you are the same person in different surroundings. And it's almost always good to get away from a stressful situation.

You've disappointed me in some small ways on occasion, but I realized after reading this that you are an exception to my statement. I guess I wasn't thinking straight. And there are possibly other people I forgot too. I'm sorry!

Staying home alone will be really nice. I don't get much time where no one else is here.

I love you too, and email me whenever of course.

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treepatter July 5 2005, 00:43:16 UTC
I think the toughest thing is that there are no guarantees. At least you feel that he is being honest with you. But you'll have to figure out if the possibility that things may not work is reason enough not to try at all.
I have similar issues, but i try not to be a self-fulfilling prophet. Let's face it: if you firmly believe that things will get screwed up sooner or later, than they probably will- you'll see to it somehow.
Personally, i try and keep an open mind.

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thedarkcrystal July 5 2005, 06:48:36 UTC
I know it's worth it. I wasn't at all ready for a relationship when I entered into this one, but I realized that he was the person who I wanted to be with and I didn't want my chance to be gone before I was ready. I knew it would be difficult but I decided to take that risk, and even when I feel like this I'm still glad I did.

And I know what you mean with the self-fulfilling prophecies. I've screwed up a lot of relationships before probably solely because of that. Or because the people were assholes. Or both. Anyway...

I have little to no control over the way that I always envision the worst that can happen. I'm trying really really really hard to live in the moment and enjoy things and relax but it's unbelievably difficult.

I still think that our relationship has a good chance. But the idea of it not working out is very hard for me to face.

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guitarist21300 July 5 2005, 04:00:49 UTC
I wish I can say anything for now but after I had to stop after the first three paragraphs. I don't feel morally right about reading people's realtionships and dramas. It does not mean I am turning you away at all. You are one of my closest friends and I don't want to judge on a relationships unless a domestic dispute happens. I don't know what the hell I am talking about...It's really hard to say...

btw I haven't celebrated this country either...

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thedarkcrystal July 5 2005, 06:19:13 UTC
It's not about my conflicts with Mike, it's about how I'm scared to be in a relationship and can't really handle it. I don't like posting about arguments I'm having with people and such in general, unless it's this really huge thing. I don't think that kind of thing belongs here. But I do understand if you don't feel comfortable reading it anyway. You are one of my closest friends as well so just do what you're comfortable with.

I did go see the fireworks. I do like fireworks a lot, I just tried to ignore that they were celebrating america and spewing chemicals and CO2 into the atmosphere and such.

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