(Untitled)

[knowthyexits]

If the situation weren't so grave, Sarah might welcome the dawn of another dismal day with a bemused laugh. Last week, she privately began chemotherapy after putting it off for too long and for the first few days, it was tolerable. After that, it became a flood of familiar symptoms and if she hadn't known any better, she might have thought she were

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[dichotomos]

I'll admit, I'd been in denial about the cancer. With my background, the things I'd seen and done, it was difficult to admit something so fucking mundane could sweep in unnoticed and hurt someone I cared about. I'd ripped monsters apart with my bare hands, but I couldn't do anything about this, and at first it had been easier to pretend it wasn't happening.

There was no denying the way Sarah looked, though, no shrugging off that feeling of impending doom. Of all the fucking things that could possibly kill this woman, it wasn't going to be a monster or a machine; it was going to be her own treacherous body.

"Come on," I prompted, my mouth pressed into a grim line as I reached for her shoulder. "I'm taking you home."

[knowthyexits]

It's a testament to how tired she is that she doesn't argue. She lifts her head and reaches for his forearm with her other hand to get a light clasp on him. "I need to eat something, it steadies my stomach," she explains, pushing herself to straightening posture as if the line of her body will help calm her down. "Just something quick, I'll bring it with me."

[dichotomos]

"I'll get it for you," I replied, and slipped a strong arm behind her back to help keep her upright. "What do you want? Nothing complicated," I remembered to add, because I very much doubted that even like this, Sarah wanted anything to do with my culinary skills.

[knowthyexits]

Sarah gives Cal a lazy smile that's somewhat tinged by her exhaustion, but mostly tempered by her emotions. "Sandwiches, Cal, that's all I need." She's a terrible cook, herself, and she's grown used to cold cuts and other deli meats. "Thank you," she adds, under her breath. She doesn't want to make a big deal of it, but feels that it needs to be said.

[tricksthetreat]

"Sarah?"

Jesus, the woman looked like shit. Trixa had intended to spend some time ransacking the games closet, looking for a few specific items. But seeing her co-worker and friend almost doubled-over... that could wait.

"Christ, do I need to get you to the clinic?"

[knowthyexits]

Sarah musters up a smile as she reaches out to rest an arm over Trixa's shoulders and give herself some support in the meantime. "Funny, I just came from there," she jokes mildly. "Seriously, I did," she says quietly to Trixa. "It's why I'm so sick." She'd been warned about the effects, but a part of her had thought that they would amount to nothing after all the battles she's waged in the past.

[tricksthetreat]

"Gaddamn, it, Sarah. Let's get you inside, or hell... can I help you home?"

She easily supported Sarah's weight, such as it was, she was pretty lithe to begin with and this illness didn't seem to be helping. So much for the invincible Sarah Connor.

[knowthyexits]

"Home," Sarah says curtly, because she doesn't want to be going back to the clinic now that she's been there. She'll be coming back, as well, and then they'll take a look and see if the cancer has diminished in any slight capacity. "I started chemo a couple of days back," she admits, even though she's still been working lunches. "The mornings are -- they're hard."

[grabmyballs]

“You don’t fucking look it.” Cook doesn’t just state the obvious because he doesn’t think Sarah knows. He wields it like a sword, testing her for a reaction like a warrior would an opponent. Where a normal person would stupidly ask if she’s alright, he does this.

But the way she looks hunched against that wall, he’s almost sure he doesn’t care if she spins around and knocks him in the jaw for his concern. “Sarah,” he says, reaching out to touch her shoulder. “Do you need to go to the clinic or something?”

[knowthyexits]

"I just came from there, Cook, I'm fine," she gets out, tersing her jaw to get through the next wave of nausea, but she rides it out. She reaches out and grips at his elbow to have a grasp, nodding repeatedly as if the motion will help her. "I'm just unwell, that's all."

[grabmyballs]

"Did they poison you?" He'd never say so, but the way she reaches out for him sends a chill through him. An overreaction, maybe, but Cook doesn't deal well with people around him changing.

"You should like.. sit down or something," he says, and reaches out to steady her. "Come on."

[knowthyexits]

Sarah gives a soft laugh at the chosen phrasing. "In a manner of speaking? Yes. But I'm the one who asked for it," she promises Cook, giving him a slight squeeze at his shoulder. "Come on, help me to the rec room. I'll get a book and doze off before I make it past two pages, I'm sure."

[1struleiscardio]

I still don't really know what's wrong with her but, when i hear her voice, I go straight to her. I stand there, watching her struggle with her body like that. I can feel my face tightening up. I've lost enough. I deserve...I deserve to not lose anymore.

"I wish you'd tell me," I say, and then I feel like shit because I shouldn't be saying things like that to her. "Let me help."

[knowthyexits]

Sarah swallows back a lump in her throat that feels like guilt and grief and anger, all at once. She bows her head and stares at the ground, wondering when she's going to have to divulge this secret, too. Maybe it's today. Maybe it's always been today. "Columbus, let's sit, okay? Let's sit and then we can talk."

[1struleiscardio]

"Okay, but let me help you," I say, reaching out for her, taking her by the shoulder. "I just want to help, Sarah. I'm sorry, okay? But...I care. I really care about you."

[knowthyexits]

Sarah takes in a deep breath and feels, suddenly, terrible for not telling Columbus earlier. He should know, he should. He's been nothing but good to her and she shouldn't be turning that away now. "Almost there," she says, reaching out to help herself into the couch, settling down with an exhaled sigh. "Columbus, I'm -- I'm sick."

[motherfuckaa]

"You know, I've had women faint at the mere sight of me," Hank began, approaching her with a mixture of genuine concern and mild apprehension, "but I've never had one puke."

Maybe Ashby spiked more than just the vodka at the morning's breakfast.

[knowthyexits]

"There's always a first," she says in a deadpan, though it's less that he disgusts her (that much, at least) and more that her stomach is in a constant state of tumultuous disagreement with the rest of her. "I'm fine," she lies, because it might come true one of these times if she just says it enough.

[motherfuckaa]

"Yeah, you look it," Hank replied dryly, coming to a stop in front of her. "At least you're safe in the knowledge that I didn't impregnate you upon first sight." Not that Hank couldn't have before the vasectomy. He was pretty damn sure his swimmers used to be Olympic athletes before they were put into retirement. "So this ain't morning sickness, unless you've been cheating on me."

Hank spoke a lot of nonsense sometimes but he knew it. Right now, he was hoping it was a successful distraction for her.

[knowthyexits]

The glare that she's been perfecting comes back in style as she glowers at him at the mere mention of him knocking her up. "What the hell are you talking about?" she gets out with a heavy amount of exhaustion in her voice. "I'm not seeing you. I'm not seeing anyone!"