a little help please?

[lady_starsong]

I am sorry to bother everyone, but I am trying to write a letter to Mizu-sama and my Japanese writting skills are worse than my speaking skills (and that is saying something..ok it's a work in progress

Comments

[akita_ino]

I'm terrible aat kanji, otherwise I might have been some help. I'm not good at writing either, better at speaking (and understanding for that matter).
some parts seem really okay, others make no sense to me here (apart from the obvious kanji issue), but my knowledge of proper vocabulary is also limited, so yeah, it does seem okay so far. noticeable that no native speaker wrote it but hey, japanese find the mistakes of western people using japanese funny (cause they think japanese is like the hardest language to learn for anyone), so I wouldn't worry too much

[akita_ino]

if you gave me the english version of it, I could look over the text and see if it fits that way

[grenadier32]

For what it's worth, there are Firefox extensions that can help you read kanji on the web.

[sailortelevator]

Your Japanese is way beyond my level so I'm afraid I can't help you there, but I can give you a tip that was given to me: don't use "あなた". Always write "水さん". :)

[eddieblackmaru]

Likewise, if you can give me your english I can help a little. My Japanese is rusty I am afraid but I don't mind helping--- I am with saliortelevator, use her name--plus sama or sempai/sensei (sama is fine but if you have heard she likes either of the other two use 'em).
Also, I think straight away you should mention who you are-- don't just say that your Japanese is bad, say, "please forgive my bad Japanese, I am an American and am just starting to learn to write." That tells her right off that your Japanese perhaps won't be flawless, however the sheer fact you are writing (and announcing it right off the bat draws her in) will astonish and flatter her. I just picked a country forgive if you are from somewhere else.

And yeah, with Akita Ino, that Japanese is considered an insanely hard language to learn, especially from the Japanese themselves. So don't beat yourself up about it, for the most part it is fine, a little awkward in spots, but the meaning gets across.

[beimprobable]

My Japanese isn't amazing either so take my advice with a grain or two of salt. I thought I could try to help a little here. If someone with better Japanese can offer you more assistance, by all means go with them.
Bold text beneath a phrase means I left the Japanese untouched because I wasn't sure what you had wanted to say.

水様さまへ

アメリカ人ですけど日本語を少しだけ勉強しましたからまだへたです。だから日本語には自信がありません。許してください。

私は、私があなたが働くことを確認しに米国の東海岸から日本に来た時の前に二度あなたに書きました。
are you saying that you went to Japan to see her live and wrote a fan letter two times? I'm having a little trouble here. I'm not sure what you're saying here.

私はあなたが退職した前に、再び水様さまに会いに来なければなりませんでした。水様をどれくらいたいへんな思うことを知って欲しいとただ思います。Do you want her to know about these difficult thoughts or do you want to know about her difficult thoughts?

私は歌を歌ったの時には子供は居たので、性能を見ています、そして、私が水様さまをするのと同じくらい多くが1つのように決してありません。
what exactly did you want to say here? I think, maybe, what you have here isn't what you wanted to say.水様さまの外国人のファンの気持ち聞いてほしい。みんなのために私がこの手紙でその言葉を日本語で書いてみます。あまりにたいへんな働くを見たので、

[beimprobable]

I see a few typos. I apologize.

その時があったら水様さまの実行を見ます。

水様さまはとても非常し有能し本当に素晴らしいと思います。

水様さまの外国人のファンの気持ちを聞いてほしい。

[sweetpinkpixie]

I have been living in Japan for 4 years now and I probably only speak English about 10% of the time, so I have a pretty good handle on the language. If you could send me your original English letter, I can correct your Japanese one a little better (there are a few parts where I am not sure what you want to say).

宜しくお願いします～(o^□^o)ノ

[sweetpinkpixie]

also have a Japanese husband who can assist♡

english version

[lady_starsong]

help is very welcome, I want to get this right. The last two note I sent were in English so I doubt she was able to get much from them. My skills are so poor I was using a computer program to help me translate..so I am sure things came out a bit wacky

Re: english version

[sweetpinkpixie]

alrighty, I will get to work on this right away!