I always forget about my journal but I have some time to waste till Ky calls ( Read more... )

PSA to myself do not scroll back 10+ years through this journal and cry every single time. The bad shit had to happen to have the life I have now. Forever thankful for my present and future with my wonderful fiancé. It was worth it all to have the life I have now ❤️❤️❤️

sooo whats been up well drama drama drama as usual. sharon started shit with me last saturday when i went over to the bar so i'm like fine i'll call john haha so he didnt answer so i filled him in on sunday he was a lil pissed off. so all of that shit got taken care of thank god and next time i see that missy bitch she's gonna get whacked right in ( Read more... )

so John my love is not coming home until tommorow. I got the bad news at 3 i was half asleep so he calls asks what i'm up to tells me i might have to do the door tonight at the bar if he cant find someone then says i'll see you tommorow around lunch time i'm like whoa are you effin serious? another night in this damn house alone!? i cant take it ( Read more... )

so me and John got into a huge fight Monday night wow talk about me having a mental breakdown good lord i was walking through windber at 4:30 in the morning in pjs with no glasses so needless to say Johns yelling at the door for me then he gets in his truck and being the tard he is drives past me twice so then he calls all worried like where are ( Read more... )

so i decided i need to distance myself from some people because i need to learn to rely on myself which is turning out to be difficult to have no one to depend on but me which has led to a lot of crying and lack of sleep but i'll make it and distancing myself from another person well thats just necessary at this point because i do not want to ( Read more... )

i am feeling about 500 emotions right now and dont know what to do. not that it is a bad thing i just wish i had someone to talk to. John fell asleep about 20 mins after we got home, started watchin the notebook then gave up and came up here and here i still sit. i have not been sleeping well at all and it sucks. i hate the feeling of being ( Read more... )

wow it has been forever and a day since i've wrote anything in here well now that i've moved in with John and just figured out how to work the computer like 2 weeks ago here i am lol so whats new...I got fired from my job for no reason at all, my money situation sucks, my car is a piece of shit, i havent been able to sleep lately during the night ( Read more... )

so i havent written in for like ever cause well life has been absolutely crazy dealing with everyone elses issues and work and taking care of John and it's like one craziness after another but things have turned out alright, at least for me :) i'm not sick anymore thats a good thing :) uhm we had a poker game sunday night it last till like 1 and i ( Read more... )

so i'm really sick i feel like i'm ready to die i came home yesterday at 10:30 and slept till John woke me up then just continued to sleep all through the day and night i called off work and Jill tried to tell me i had to come i was like no sorry about your luck i'm ready to fall over and pass out i dont think so!!! and just because i am so sick ( Read more... )