you give me a buzz ( Read more... )

Our bodies melding are a mere distraction ( Read more... )

My iron-clad heart is small and splintered ( Read more... )

Is this the part where I start to feel devastated that stolen glances don't show enough love behind your eyes the way you used to look at me ( Read more... )

Ever since I met you, I've started moisturising my body and thinking more about my pubic hair. I've never believed anyone who told me I was pretty. When you grow up not hearing you're beautiful, any compliments about your appearance after 18-21 are dismissed as insincerely polite or the mere recognition of an improvement from your awkward tween ( Read more... )

I read my emails to J four years ago and it made me sick. To think why I wanted to end it with her still hasn't changed all these years later, and I haven't been able to start anything with anyone else for exactly the same reason. I know I clung onto her because I was needy and afraid, and she wasn't. Thrown into the same environment that left me ( Read more... )

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I've largely stopped writing. Maybe that's what "growing up" does. I don't know what makes children who are so alive to the world start to be afraid of everything as adults. I'm still the same person, only this time I don't have the luxury of being a teenager or even in my early 20s to kid myself that somehow I can change ( Read more... )

If I took anything from New York, it was that kind of epiphany I had while sleepless in bed one night. I hadn't thought of you much at all, which was satisfying, unexpected. I thought I'd be pining for you in my moments of aloneness and reflection, if I came across something achingly romantic and would automatically conjure the thought of you, ( Read more... )

I'm not even able to reiterate how much it needs to dawn on me you don't love me. Your actions show you don't love me. So why do I do this to myself? Am I that bored, self-destructive and empty ( Read more... )