One of the Four Loves

[substitute]

The Greeks have four words for love. There is agape, or spiritual love; storge, which is familial love; philia, which is the love between friends; and of course eros, sexual love.

I have problems with all four. Eros is a wasteland for me and always has been. My family is a source of constant trouble, much of which I cause myself. And I've been

Comments

[bruisedhips]

Like I said yesterday, it has always baffled me how the definition of friendship varies so drastically from person to person.
To me, If I consider someone my "friend" it means that I enjoy them,would help them out within my means, and feel that they would defend my honor if I wasn't around to do so.
I know that sounds like a loose guideline, but it is what it is.
I have had so many different sets of "friends" in my little life, and the word seems to redefine itself every 5 years or so. I kind of like that I have learned to just accept everyone for who they are and have completely lowered any expectations from them. I'm more interested in liking people than being liked mostly. To hell with em.

Now tell me who doesn't like me so I can KEEEEEEEEEL them.

what do you say?

[lil_om]

Forget about all the bullshit for a day. dont think about who is who and what means what and come to the Warped Tour with me. its this friday. i dont know who is playing, i dont care. i just want to see a good show with people whose company i would enjoy were there not live music around. we arent "close" friends but i do consider you a friend and would love to see ya outside of Ds!

i will set one ticket aside until you let me know one way or another, if you know anyone else and get back to me in time, then i will have 1 other...maybe 2 extra tickets, should you know someone else.

Re: what do you say?

[substitute]

You're a great guy, Adam, and I appreciate the friendly note. I can't go, so someone else should get the ticket, but the offer is appreciated.

Re: what do you say?

[lil_om]

not a problem! all of my "friends" (lol) are flakes, so if you change your mind let me know, otherwise i will hopefully be able to get down to Ds and see you and everyone else soon. take care man!!
ps. i know lots-a-peeps, who know lots-a-peeps in the low type places, just give me the word and mall goths will find 5 big ass ex-cons just siting on their hearse waiting for them after their lil DnD session!

[eamajyn]

I struggle with this too. I have recently found myself mostly alone in my life and endeavors. Part of this is because of distance, because the few friends I have live far away, and part of this is because I am finding that my definition of friend is not the same as others'. When my definition of friendship is not the same as someone else's, I get hurt, always. So I am in a process now where I am trying to figure out what my boundaries are once again, because the old system was simply not working

yup

[changeng]

and this is why after an disasterous, family-friend-career-life-destroying marriage, it's subsequent Burgess-Meredith-librarian-last-man-on-earth divorce and a five-year absence, I started performing again just about this time last year.

I'm definitely wearing sommeone else's pants.

Which is also why I've decided to be 30 again. I've called "do over!" and refuse to walk past any mirrors. I exercise, eat well and allow people of any age to be good buddies as long as they want to be and then let them go. Pure, blissful denial. I even had a band/improv theatrical show last year involving my "Church of Denial" - 11 person cast for a one-man show. Very cathartic.

Will it catch up with me when I'm older? Nah - I plan to spontaneously combust at some point, so it's a moot point.

and to whoever finds my charred, green remains... sorry.

Re: yup

[substitute]

"Burgess-Meredith-librarian-last-man-on-earth divorce" sounds really, really bad. I'm sorry that happened to you.

The phrase "...and then let them go" is important. I can't do that easily; it's like pulling bandages slowly off hairy skin. Which also happened to me this week. It's a funny old world, ain't it?

I want a do-over but I'm too far out of sync with everyone. I just spent the last ten years discovering that.

Re: yup

[changeng]

I'm so far out of synch that I play hip hop tunes on a toy piano and monkey for white audiences! I've come to understand that celebrating my un-synch-ness loudly makes me happy to be me, even tho I've had big tragedies to deal with

[miss_geek]

i've lost my ability to form complete sentences that make sense lately, but i have to say that i do relate to this. more than you think being that i likely get lumped into the married or divorced or grown up with kid categories, though i feel that realistically i don't fit into any of them.

i will be your new friend, i know that we are already "friends" but i would enjoy developing our friendship as opposed to giving it up...

and also, what eamajyn said. like you, she's good at saying stuff.