I feel a poem comming on....

Tell me your thoughts on the sky
and why we can'f fly

Tell me why you think life is real
and not something we just feel

give some advice to those on stage

lol k that was short lived and unfinished....

im tired....

for once why cant things just work out like they are supposed to. 

              I've come to the realization that in order for me to really change my situation and my life I must first break this never ending cycle of guilt and shame, that I make myself.  So heres the deal, when I was a youngen I really didnt have any control of this cycle because you tend to accept everything that your parents tell you because ( Read more... )

School.  I find out today that I've achieved a 45 in calc and a 66 in bio.  WHAT A FUCKING TOOL.  why does it always seem so much harder for me to achieve my goals.  Im not taking either of those courses in University but they are prerequisites to the program.  I think that is completely useless.  Im so fucking pissed at my teachers.  I did the ( Read more... )

So last weekend I went up to oshawa to see jeff.  we walked from simcoe and bloor all the way to his rez which we realized was a good 4 miles or soo.  It was such a good night for a walk it was nice out and the stars were out.  It was such a nice walk we talked for the whole 2 hour walk.  Hes such a great guy....love him so much.  Anyways so we got ( Read more... )

      I got to talk to Krista the other day.  It was so nice to hear her voice.  I miss that girl so much its crazy.  Like she said I miss our talks. About boys, and parents, and work, and all the great things in life really.  I find myself, more lately than ever, needing someone to talk to.  Someone I can have those talks with.  I find myself ( Read more... )

Ive come to the realization that just because my dad is sober and says sorry. ITS ONLY BEEN 2 WEEKS and I've been feeling guilty and acting like a parent for my dad for so long that this 2 weeks is nothing.  Also, maybe he needs me to be away from him because im a reminder of his failures.  Just a thought.  this is what lori thinks...shes my social ( Read more... )

At times like these when the world around seems so crumbled and frial,
As soon as there is a shred of light peeking through this tiny window of hope.
Someone comes along closes the blinds. 
I had wished that I could move in with kat, and not really have to talk to my dad about it
Untill the day came when i needed to get my stuff. 
But like i said ( Read more... )

This is to all the men out there...

WOMEN ARE NOT TO BE CONTROLLED OR USED.
WE ARE NOT YOUR OBJECTS OR YOUR SUBJECTS.
WE DONT LIKE TO BE YELLED AT OR NEGLECTED.
WE HATE IT WHEN YOU DONT CALL OR AVOID US.
WE SHOULDNT BE TREATED LIKE A TASK.
WE ARE NOT A BOOTY CALL.

My dad kicked me out of the house on friday, richard never calls me and I hate my ( Read more... )

One thing that i've learned about myself in the past month is that im a control freak. I tend to favour being in control of every aspect of my day to day life. From where I go, who im with, and when it happens. But most importantly and whats bothering me most is my bfs. Now, ive realized that both adam and alexei we're okay with me controling ( Read more... )