Fanfiction: Wake Up Heart (chapter 1, part 2)

[soliandxpyne]

Damnit.

Goku sent another of his attackers skidding through the dirt, having knocked him unconscious, but not killing him.  Sanzo and Gojyo would pitch a fit, he knew, but something about this group of youkai seemed...off.  They didn’t seem crazy--well, anyone who took them on with such low-level powers was crazy--but they weren’t “crazy

Comments

[lillypuff]

I have to say it: Nice one Hakkai ;)

What a wonderful start to what I am guessing is going to be an awesome fic. Loved the flashbacks, it's a much more intense way of telling what has already happened. Can't wait to see more.

[soliandxpyne]

Yeah, Hakkai will take a lot of crap from Sanzo, but even he has his limits when Gojyo is involved.

Thank you! I decided on the flashbacks as a way to put the action ahead and lend a sense of intrigue without having to go back and have one of the characters think or talk about stuff that had already happened. I'm glad you liked it!

[soliandxpyne]

Lol, oh, the irony, it kills. D: What was originally supposed to be an excuse for pr0n developed into something so plot-ful, I found myself having the hardest time actually introducing the porny elements without feeling dirty, or as if I was straying unnecessarily from the plot. Ohhh, my goodness, but yes, there will continue to be foreshadowing liek whoa

[eyesofshinigami]

Man, that was some intense reading! *loves on this story*

This is incredible. The very idea of Goku going all ST without breaking his limiter is a fascinating one, to be quite honest. I love the way that you're presenting him here, so grown-up and damnably sexy. Even when he's lying to Sanzo.

And poor Sanzo! You almost feel bad for the guy for getting the hell beaten out of him like that. Your descriptions were awesome, making me wince in appropriate places. I could practically visualize the way that Sanzo looked like that.

I agree with kispexi2 entirely about Gojyo. It never fails that he can always bring a little bit of light to an extremely dark situation. That's why we love the kappa, ne?

I am so utterly engrossed in this story! You owned my soul, Soli-chan. The characterizations were so beautiful! You are one of the people I think that has the best handle on the boys, honestly.

SO. MUCH. LOVE.

[soliandxpyne]

XDDD Tha~nk you, sweetie, I'm so glad you thought so! I also find Goku's powers and his ST-self a very interesting topic, which is a big part of what inspired this story. And I've tried hard to write a Goku which shows some of the maturity he has gained over the course of the manga--grown-up, but not too grown-up, and unconsciously sexy (because he is, damnit!). LOL

I wanted Sanzo to have the shit beat out of him, yes, but I also did a lot of research as well: deciding what bones were broken, keeping track of how long they would take to heal, and what kind of physical therapy, if any, was necessary for full recovery. I had originally considered having Sanzo's patella shattered (!!), but decided against any specific knee injury at all after realizing just a dislocation of the patella requires some serious recovery time and intense physical therapy. <-- I mean, come on, the knee thing was only supposed to be so he could have a sexy limp for a little while...I naturally love to be very descriptive, even poetically so, but I do have

[stalkerbunny]

o_o I'm truly impressed now ( I was so tense I was shaking when I finished reading, actually).
It took me a while to understand the flashback (*slow*) and when I did it just added to the intensity of the story. Which there is so much of it's almost raw.
The characters are very much in character...I think kispexi2 phrased it very well, this is how they would act, I think (Gojyo's voice is spot on, and it's wonderful. Really, they all are. ). And my heart aches for them all, expecially for Sanzo, because...well, he's such a fractured character to begin with, any more damage is scary. as for Goku, he hates lies so much, and for him to feel he has to lie about something like this...it just breaks my heart. ;_;

Thank you. Can't wait to see how the story continues.

[soliandxpyne]

Oooh, I'm glad to hear it! Anything I write, I'd like it to have as big an effect as possible. ^.^ I'll admit the flashbacks are probably a bit confusing at first, but I didn't want to explain too much, and was hoping they'd start to make more sense as they went on.

Eeek, thanks so much, sometimes it's like pulling teeth to get them to behave how they are supposed to, but then when they do, it's such a relief. lol! Sometimes I may get annoyed by one or more of the four of them, especially after reading a fanfic where it just feels like they aren't thinking or saying the right things, but writing this reminds me how much I really love all of them. ♥

[geri]

my goodness i cried for poor sanzo after reading this story. bsides of his femoral artiries were cut and goku sitting their pondering what is going to happen now that's more scarier than sanzo dieingto me for he would in fact take out every yokkai good bad or indifferent it wouldn't matter to him.
As i've said before your write the most delicious stories i've come across, please do so continue i can wait for the next up date on this post.

[soliandxpyne]

Thanks so much for the kind comments!

Yes, I think Goku has the potential to be very frightening...but it is (usually) balanced by his inherently kind and honest heart. The scene where Gojyo and Hakkai came across Sanzo and Goku in the forest and Goku was so bloodthirsty was one of my favorite to write--I would imagine there was a sort of terrible beauty and grace to Goku's movements.

I will be working hard on my next chapter! :d