AU

[soldier_singled]

It's pretty late for them to both be up, but when Sophie decides she's up, she's up and there's not a thing that either of them can do to convince her other wise. She's got Web's fierce blue eyes but maybe she looks a little bit more like Joe in her face, the older she gets

Comments

[aintthatbad]

Thanks to Frank Perconte, Skinny's picked up on the importance of always brushing your teeth. Thanks to living here, he's gotten used to a whole boatload of odd sights. Joe Liebgott with an infant on his hip still doesn't quite register, though, and Skinny pauses in the doorway on his way to the bathroom.

"Jesus, Lieb, she's never gonna bed down if you feed her cookies now. Even I know that."

[aintthatbad]

Skinny tries to peel her off his shoulder. He tries tickling her. He tries flat-out lifting. No dice.

"I think she's magnetized," he says, his face crinkling with effort. "Little monkey's latched on and clinging. Here, you help."

[soldier_singled]

"You not even a little bit tired, Little bit?" says Joe, stepping in and taking hold of her gently, lifting her away from Skinny and holding her with her back to his chest, one arm around her, the other under her to support her.

"Your daddy's fast asleep. Ain't you gonna take pity on your pops?"

[aintthatbad]

"You're asking for pity from an infant?" Skinny shakes his head and picks up a ball of dough. "They're like the prime example of 'no mercy.' They're totally implacable in the face of your wants and needs." He pops the dough in his mouth and relishes for a moment, God, all that butter. "Which is why I only ever intend to borrow other people's children."

[soldier_singled]

"I keep trying to appeal to her better nature," says Joe, grinning, kissing the top of Sofa's head. She's got the same curly dark hair as Webster.

"Still, if you borrow her often enough for me to get laid occasionally, who am I to complain."

[aintthatbad]

He shakes his head and holds a finger up. "Oh, that's the other thing. Parents don't ever get to have sex. They do and bam, more kids. It's cosmic. I am living proof of that rule. After nine, my mama just gave up. My dad had to take up carpentry to cope." The twist of his mouth turns wry. "Then again, I supposed that is one problem you and Web don't actually have to worry about."

[soldier_singled]

"No, it ain't. I ain't about to carry any babies. I ain't even figured out how I'm gonna explain that to this one yet."

He kisses the top of Sophie's head again.

"Not that I'd swap her for all the tea in China."

[aintthatbad]

"I'd stick with the stork story if I was you." He watches them for a moment, all exhausted and aglow. It's downright lovely, God's honest truth. "Anybody ever tell you what was so great about all that tea in China? Never really saw the appeal, myself."

[soldier_singled]

"You think she's gonna buy that forever?" says Joe, grinning. "That's like Webster saying that she's never going to be ready to have babies of her own."

Joe thinks about all the tea in China for a moment, bouncing Sophie gently against him.

"Yeah, I suppose not. What won't I swap her for instead?"

[aintthatbad]

"I think your best answer is a steady and concerted campaign of misinformation. Get the other guys in on it." He pops another ball of dough in his mouth. "I hear they got rubies in the Hindu Kush or something. I dunno, maybe all the diamonds in Paris?" He smirks. "All the possums in Old Virginny?

[soldier_singled]

"All these goddamn uncles, the poor kid ain't gonna get to date until she's thirty. Just imagine the disapproving looks Doc Roe can muster when he wants to.'

He grins to himself when Sophie yawns massively.

"All the broads in Paris, maybe. Good times, Skinny."

[aintthatbad]

"You think? I don't know, considering whose kid she is, I have a sneaking suspicion she'll be doing a whole lot of whatever she damn well pleases."

Skinny snorts, which turns into a chuckle. "Okay, that might give me pause. Though I think I'd switch it up for Holland. Those Dutch knew a lot more about gratitude than the French ever did. Plus." He grins. "Tall women."

[soldier_singled]

"You're probably right."

Joe can't help but look a little bit resigned at that.

"What do you need 'em to be tall for? All the same size once they're on their backs or on their knees, ain't they?"

[aintthatbad]

He rolls his eyes. "You're a philistine, you know that? More is better, Lieb. It doesn't take an idiot. Anyway, I don't like bending that far to kiss a girl." A wistful smirk. "And they're always so grateful."

[soldier_singled]

Web would hang both of them up by their heels if he heard them talking this way in front of Sophie, but, thank the good Lord, he ain't here.

"...Oh, yeah, I bet. Hell, you gotta be able to do somethin' right, aintcha."

[aintthatbad]

"The fairer sex seems to think so." Quite extensively, at that.

Hey, the kid's only an infant. It's not what you're talking about at this point, it's how pleasantly you say it. They don't know the difference.