i can't do this. i know i won't kill myself because of how selfish a gesture it is. but it's appealing. i cry all the time. i want to take a scar for every time. i cut for the first time in like two years a few weeks ago. it felt so. fucking. good. and the blood. the visceral red blood. it was deep. and on my arm. i haven't done on my arm since ( Read more... )

i always wind up in the same place. miserable, people angry at me for shit i didn't do, drama everywhere. i live in the tornado. it never takes me to oz.

A year later. Haven't done dope in a very long time. Alone for the most part. John is gone, he's a fugitive. I miss him, even though I know I shouldn't. I can't drive until December. But I guess it's better than being a junkie.

so. i'm grounded for like..ever. and i'm not allowed to see john or any of the other people i was hanging around with. i was in a bad way. a rough spot i guess. silly drugs ( Read more... )

if you crave it then you know that you are injured ( Read more... )

I GOT MY LICENSE!!!

fifth times the charm.

i'm so fucking excited!

so still nobody knows whats wrong with me. but i'm chill with it now ( Read more... )

oi. i've been sick forever. i had to quit smoking as my lungs are shit. oh well ( Read more... )

i kinda have a brain tumor. it's wicked small on the pituitary but yeahhh. ring in 09 with some fucking brain surgery.

i'm not that upset about it. don't know why.

oh well.

so my surgery is tomorrow. of course i'm scared. but i have to so, yeah.

if anyone wants to visit me i'll be at milford regonal.