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since day 1 i knew it wasnt for real ( Read more... ) -
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i feel like i lost myself -
closed.
so today we closed on a new house. I thought it would be a more eventful day... if it were up to me it would have been but my parents aren't keen on the idea of rushing over... i brought over a few things... but my dad didnt give us the keys he wants to make copies first... which idk why because i'm very capable of making my own copies... oh well ( Read more... ) -
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Im feeling this overwhelming cloud of heavy sadness again.... its so crippling..i dont feel tired but i dont feel awake. i cant find anything that i want to do... nothing right now is exciting to me. just feels like a heavy fog that i cant see out of. i just dont understand at all. I have nothing to be sad about but i cant shake it ( Read more... ) -
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What will i do ( Read more... ) -
I had a dream...
my dream last night was super weird ... as always....
I was wandering the streets and found a dog that looked like a hairy fluff ball like dark greyish brownish... so i was so excited i went over to rays house.. and his mom took the dog upstairs.. gave it a bath and shaved it and bought down to me a little white chihuahua puppy. :D -
New lalala
So today i had a new client. And leave it up to my already amazing clients to find me some new amazing clients.... she was a rabbi. lolll and no judgement its just funny to me. anywayyyyyy. so my dad is home of course and has to be talking to all my clients all the time whenever they come over.... and just at the tip of my tongue let me skim ( Read more... ) -
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The landscaper said he put almost 1000$ into the lawn and if it gets fucked up like last year hes gonna just walk out because he doesn't give a shit anymore. -
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My dad literally just walked through the living room with his underwear and T shirt was flexing and said "does it look like I lost weight?" And I said yea (while trying not to even look at him) and he said "I'm going to lose another 50lbs by my birthday.... I'm going to be a human orangutan." Whaaaaaaaaaat the fuck.
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he should probably just leave me now... i cant make him happy i dont want to have kids i dont want to cook him steak i dont want to be religious... i dont want to live a conventional life ... i want to sleep late WITH my cats IN the bed and have the heat up high in the house and post whatever the fuck i want on facebook without being belittled.