I just feel an inexpressible weight right now. I see so many others lives progressing and becoming and it feels like the little fiction that I have fabricated for myself is just stagnating. Im still doing the same things now as I was ten years ago and I can't seem to break from the mold. Too many bad choices.

ugh I feel so completely overwhelmed; but it's not like stuff I can't usually handle. I havent felt like this since like 9 years ago.

I was fine like for two months now... Im finally going to the gym everyday... getting my teeth fixed and making my life bettter... and Im still like on the hook for other people. It is getting depressing. How is it that I can be so solid and my brother and boyfriend are seriously just left of helpless. My brother judges the shit out of me on a ( Read more... )

Even when you fall apart, Ill pick up your bloodstained heart.

I had the most awesome day yesterday-too bad it ended rough but hey thats alcohol right. The coyotes are seriously the most fun u can have in phoenix. This coming year we are gonna get our own box. And I'll write it off against our bills lol.

Im sure you can never really go back but I miss what you we're like when you were genuinely nice. its kind of weird seeing how nasty you are now. And I think for the first time I genuinely want no part of you.

ooooh wont you take me home tonight, oh down beside your red fire light. oh you gonna give it all you got. fat bottomed girls you make the rocking world go round

kind of weird. I found some of my music files from Flag right before I left and I kind of realized that most of my stuff came from Kevin and how significantly he has and did influence(d) my life even today ( Read more... )

Here we go again. I read what some of the folks who I formerly worked with post on their facebooks and I'm totally reminded of why I shouldn't work there. Its kind of hard to not notice when they fuck up stupid words! I feel like a whale in a puddle. I think I stopped breathing a couple of years ago.

Ive kind of been reviewing the stuff at hand and the dates all look good. Im just sort of concerned that i had to sign off on the things I was hit with.

OH man. long month. Kind of weird how the shit has hit the fan. I'm this close to sueing the shit out of the company that fired me. The question is should a good company suffer for the mis steps of a few bigoted assholes on the bottom of the rung. Probably not. In their defense I think the people at the top were trying to do the right thing when ( Read more... )