(Untitled)

[saemiligr]

This is a really long ansty block of text about my dad
it was structured at first, but then it just turned into all these feelings that I had bottled up on the inside. And I .... just didn't stop.
so click at your own risk.

Comments

[inner_ch1ld]

My father is the same way. He will forever compare me to my stepsister who just graduated a 4 year college and is now married. She has always out shined anything I ever did while I lived with them. To my father, I am a lost cause. It fucking hurts. I would never admit that to anyone, but it really fucking hurts.
I have to go to class...but I will be back in two hours if you want to talk. IM or phone, it's up to you, babe.

*HUG*

[saemiligr]

*hugs back tightly* I probably won't be able to get back online till tommorow but thank you so much.
The funny part is that my sister was the problem child and I was supposed to be the good one.
She's married with kids and Im ... well were Im at right now.
*shrug*

[merchendiver]

*hugs* Wow we sound like we have similar issues. I am so sorry you are having to deal with that on top of everything. But Look hon, you are still in school, you got an amazing grade on a test. You are working and doing your best. We can't always live up to the plans our parents set out for us, and we do make mistakes. The thing is to try and learn and not repeat them.

[saemiligr]

*hugs back gratefully*
The truth is I could do better.
Not to get angsty but both me and my dad know I could do better, what he doesn't know is that I never learned how to do better. That's what Im doing now *shrug*

[xxgardenxx]

"If you take one step forward the world will change... maybe".
Watching Atashinchi no Danshi over the weekend and this was a line, and it struck me for some reason. It was very coincidental and timely for me, anyway.

With my dad, I can't make a single mistake. Not even a tiny one- I'm automatically labeled as my sister "the second" and treated as such, he just shuts down to who I am and what I'm doing. Parents... have that switch that flips where they can't see anything outside of a single thought, I guess?

Well... we can't start anywhere else than with baby steps, right? :)

[hesidhe]

O_O

*compassionate huggle*

[mzsugarrat]

I'm sorry to hear that you have these kind of problems with your dad:(
From your other entries it seems like you're otherwise pretty close yeah? It hurts when things are like this, when somebody you love and look up to are all disappointed in you...But you know, a lot of it might just be that he is worried about you and feel all powerless not being able to help you? He might be so blinded by his worries so that's why he doesn't how far you've come?
Sorry, not trying to be all psycho analytic, just trying to give support. Hope you don't mind:)
*Warm hugs*