Yesterday during one of my classes i began writing a poem... but all i have is the beginning for now...

Lies have cause my heart to bleed
Slowly taking away all i need
Listening to the angels die
As raven tears my eyes do cry

Release me from this hell-bound hold
Shelter me from the wicked and cold

hmmm...... sore, swollen throat....coughing....stuffy ear..... i think im sick. owell. atleast i didnt have to go to that hell hole of a school today.yeah! i got to watch gothica last night with laurie and micah. thats a pretty good movie! talk about a psycho bitch takin out her rage on a fat ass pimp rapist. thats fuckn awsome. i dont normally ( Read more... )

o yea..... i went to my last counselor's meeting this past saturday. i didnt have much to say and the dude really was annoying the fuck out of me, so i basically told him i wasnt coming back and lied about me getting better. im currently waiting to go see my psycologist about taking me off this fucking paxil shit ive been on for 8 fucking months. ( Read more... )

yeah baby!!! i had a blast this weekend!! i had the pleasure of sneaking out of my house saturday night, which goes down in my books as the first time ive ever snuck out, and went to a party at my new found friend michael's house. and man o man did i have fun. i havent had that much fun in a very long time and i do believe that it was due time ( Read more... )

I FOUND MY HANDCUFFS!!!!!! WOOOOO!!!!!!! bring on my victims!

i talked to my mom a little while ago and told her i wanted to be off my anti depressants. she says im doing better, but the real reason i wanna get away from them is because im tried of feeling like my happiness is all because of those god forsaken pills i take every night. i go to my counselor saturday for the first time in about a month. the ( Read more... )

Hey now... i was in a good mood today. i was on a major sugar rush for most of school, mostly due to me eating 24 donut hole before i got to school. but i will say, i had fun. my friend heather is going to introduce me to a friend of hers who apparently wants to meet me this weekend; atleast, i hope to meet him. i talked to him on my cell phone ( Read more... )

In many ways, i do too feel like i was taken advantage of... i mean, yes i was wanting to do stuff with him, but only because i was hallucinating and wasnt completely aware of my actions, and i do promise you, i would never in my sad little life ever let him get near me or even think of doing anything like that with ihm. i mean, yes, i am lonely, ( Read more... )

I must say it has been awhile since ive typed. i guess ive just been too caught up with my mind floating constantly to sit down and try to write things out. owell.... i have returned, but not with any good news. im still lonely... im beginning to think back to all the good times ive had with my guy friends and it makes me sad...of course...typical ( Read more... )

.......i fucked myself over last night..... i took some ambien like i do pretty much every weekend with laurie, with the exception of our friend d bein there. the effects of the ambien, incase you dont know, is that they pretty much make you lose your sense of reasoning and you dont give a fuck about anything. (along with helping insomniacs sleep) ( Read more... )