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So much has happened in the past year and a half and though my heart is still on track my head doesn't seem to fit anywhere. It's ok though, I think we all have a path and whatever happens, I feel like I'm at least headed somewhere. Even if that somewhere is something out of sight. I'm moving back to Phoenix in a week. I don't know what I'm going ( Read more... )

I find solice in my solitude ( Read more... )

I guess I only write now when I'm down. I guess that makes sense. When I'm down I need someone to talk to but there really isn't anyone at this time of night so this is what I've got. I'm a shell. Well I'm mostly a shell. The only part of me that feels full is the knot in my chest. It gets tighter and tighter and heavier and heavier to the point ( Read more... )

I am mad as hell.

It's one of those nights where I need someone to talk to but there's no one awake so I guess this is it. Feeling pretty empty at the moment. I don't know what to do. This is one of those situations they make movies about, except once the movie is over the emotions are gone. In my case they're here and I have no place to put them. I met someone so ( Read more... )

my mood isn't gloomy btw, I don't know why it put that

You know, a little punk music and some good convesation with good friends can really do you good. It may not fix everything, but at least you get a little break from the dark... hey I actually ate something today so that's saying something. Headed back to phoenix tomorrow night after work. Seeing the therapist friday and then hopefully spending ( Read more... )

Alright so I started nose diving last week and now I'm deep in it. I have so much shit running through my head I can't function. I lost ten pounds this weekend from not eating, sleeping, and all the stress and chain smoking. Every time I look at food I want to vomit. Every time someone tries to make me laugh I ignore them. This is a pretty black ( Read more... )

It's nights like these that are always the hardest. Listening to depressing music and thinking about all the times I hit rock bottem. Honestly it all comes down to me, I never had anyone else to blame for the way I felt sometimes. The dark corners I could lose myself in, the hopeless drives with no destination, no privacy from the scorn and inquiry ( Read more... )