A Living Nightmare.

[r_moony]

Open RP, if anyone feels like taking on a slightly desperate Remus. If there's more than one person that wants to drop by to talk to him, each conversation will be treated separately. <3

------------------------------------------------------ Remus knows well enough that he should be in his room. He knows that his place right now is with his wife,

Comments

[pinkhairedauror]

She has talked with her mother... and it hasn't decreased the guilt, or the numbness, at all. It was a sharing, of sorts, though. Understanding. She now knows what her mother has gone through, time and again, when she herself has been in action. Though I was never actually captured. That doesn't make any difference... the understanding of her mother is humbling.

She walks in through the entrance, to go back to... she can't go back to the 'security' of their quarters, because the security of Hogwarts has been betrayed.

And the first thing she sees are Remus' eyes, flashing at her from the darkness.

In a way, she is afraid to meet those eyes, but they are what greets her on entering the castle, and they startle words out of the tearless blankness.

"It should have been me. He had me helpless. I'd rather it were me there, instead of Teddy."

The words seem to echo, as hollow as she feels, in the large space, seemingly empty but for them.

[r_moony]

The second the door opens he's already standing, a hand reaching for his wand unconsciously. Hogwarts really didn't feel safe anymore, and it's a feeling that he absolutely despises, but it's there nonetheless. It makes him edgy, but it takes away from everything else he has been thinking about.

Seeing Dora in front of him, however, and hearing her words make his mind go blank. How can she even...think that?

...but hadn't he been thinking earlier how it should have been him in their place?

Putting his hand in his pocket, he walks over to her and wraps his arms around her.

"Please don't think that, love," he murmurs into her hair, holding her slightly tighter. "I'd rather it be no one, least of all you or Teddy."

[pinkhairedauror]

His arms around her make her shake again, but there are no tears, no sobs. Just dry, uncontrollable shivers. His words... make her mind spin in a new direction.

"You're... correct, as usual. Rather it were nobody at all. But Teddy..." She swallows.

"I was there and I made no bleeding difference. I didn't even nick Snape, I think. And then I was... discarded..."

Her knees almost feel like giving way under her, and she almost clings to him.

"Please... he'll be all right, won't he? They won't do anything to him?" She hates herself for being so weak. For asking of him to give reassurance when he probably needs one himself... and for asking him for reassurance that might be false, above all.

[r_moony]

He understands her need for reassurance. He does, and he doesn't fault her for it. If anything, he understands perfectly that she needs that reassurance.

Holding her slightly tighter, he nods. "Yes, love. He will be all right, and we will bring him back home."

That wasn't a lie. They would bring him back, somehow. They had to.

That second part of what she asked, however, he's not sure just how well he can promise it. They both knew Death Eaters. They both knew what could happen... "He will be safe and sound soon, Dora. I promise. I swear it, love." Another kiss, and he holds her closer.

"What Snape did, that was not your fault. Just how it wasn't Harry's. We all trusted Snape. And he... He took advantage of that trust. Of the situation, but this is not your fault. I need you to believe me, Dora." He turns to her then, his voice softening. "Do you believe me?"

[thelionharted]

James has managed to sneak out of bed yet again -- really, Poppy being upset with him doesn't matter when this has happened.

"Hey, Remus," he says quietly, sitting down next to him. "Map came in handy again."

[r_moony]

"Hello, James." He turns to him for a moment, finally managing to look away from the door again. "I thought I was the only one that was be awake at this hour."

Although he wants to tell James to go back to bed, for now he doesn't. He needs the company, and James has just lived through this with Harry. He knows what he's going through.

[thelionharted]

He moves to wrap an arm over Remus' shoulder, scooting close. "Nah, I couldn't sleep." After a moment he adds, "Don't worry, mate. I realise how stupid it is of me to say that, but -- he'll be alright, for the most part. After all, we got Harry back. We've got something Voldemort wants."

[r_moony]

"It's not stupid," he assures him with a small and very faint smile as he leans slightly against him. It's done unconsciously, but he's just so bloody tired of it all.

After a beat. "I'm tired of all this. All the games they keep playing. I actually even started considering taking my family and getting out of here once and for all." Looking down, he adds wryly, "It was supposed to be over, James..."

It's not fair that he's dumping all this on him and he realizes this as soon as the words come out of his mouth. It shows by how apologetic he looks almost immediately.

"Just... None of this makes any bloody sense."

[named_for_two]

He shouldn't be up and about, but he is. He muses how odd it feels to walk through the castle without his invisibility cloak. He's completely at the mercy of anyone who finds him.

But he doesn't care. He won't leave the castle, go to the grounds. But he needs to walk, to think, to cry away from his father, grandfather and the Headmaster who he was named for, who hadn't betrayed him.

He pauses then and he clears his throat, softly.

"...Professor Lupin?

[r_moony]

Remus turns and stands immediately. He has been meaning to go to the infirmary to check on Al, but after finding out that Teddy had been taken everything else had suddenly disappeared from his mind.

"Hello, Al," he says gently, reaching to touch his shoulder. "Shouldn't you be resting...?"

[bigbadpadfoot]

Sirius is tired as well. Tired of people being cut down in the dark, tired of betrayal and tired of fighting in a war that they can't seem to figure out. He's just tired and it shows as he steps in through the door.

Padfoot had needed to go out for a run.

He'd been planning on just sneaking outside, but as he pads quietly down the stairs, he sees a familiar form sitting at the base of them and slows his steps.

[r_moony]

Remus turns as soon as he hears him, and he just braves a smile as best as he can when he sees it's Sirius. He feels absolutely pathetic just sitting there, doing nothing, but getting up and moving on when his son is in danger somehow seems much worse. What if he came back any minute, and he wasn't there waiting for him? It's a stupid thought, and foolish of him to think so, but it's impossible to hope for anything else at the moment.

"You know," he suddenly says in a low voice, sounding almost apologetic, "I thought I understood how you felt when Harry was taken. In a way I did, I suppose, but..."

With everyone else it was somewhat easy to hide what he was feeling. With Sirius, right now, he just can't.

"...I don't know what to do."

[bigbadpadfoot]

"I don't think anyone expects you too, either."

Sirius takes the last few steps silently and then takes a seat. "I certainly don't. Have you heard anything else?"

He wonders if Harry got in touch with Voldemort, to figure out the terms. He wonders if anyone will send something else as proof. He wonders if the next item will be something worse...

[r_moony]

"Just what Harry told us. Other than that... I don't think there has been any other news."

He takes a deep breath, trying to clear his head and regain some control of what he's feeling.

Quietly, "I still cannot believe we trusted him."