A Living Nightmare.
Open RP, if anyone feels like taking on a slightly desperate Remus. If there's more than one person that wants to drop by to talk to him, each conversation will be treated separately. <3
------------------------------------------------------ Remus knows well enough that he should be in his room. He knows that his place right now is with his wife, ( Read more... )
------------------------------------------------------ Remus knows well enough that he should be in his room. He knows that his place right now is with his wife, ( Read more... )
She walks in through the entrance, to go back to... she can't go back to the 'security' of their quarters, because the security of Hogwarts has been betrayed.
And the first thing she sees are Remus' eyes, flashing at her from the darkness.
In a way, she is afraid to meet those eyes, but they are what greets her on entering the castle, and they startle words out of the tearless blankness.
"It should have been me. He had me helpless. I'd rather it were me there, instead of Teddy."
The words seem to echo, as hollow as she feels, in the large space, seemingly empty but for them.
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Seeing Dora in front of him, however, and hearing her words make his mind go blank. How can she even...think that?
...but hadn't he been thinking earlier how it should have been him in their place?
Putting his hand in his pocket, he walks over to her and wraps his arms around her.
"Please don't think that, love," he murmurs into her hair, holding her slightly tighter. "I'd rather it be no one, least of all you or Teddy."
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"You're... correct, as usual. Rather it were nobody at all. But Teddy..." She swallows.
"I was there and I made no bleeding difference. I didn't even nick Snape, I think. And then I was... discarded..."
Her knees almost feel like giving way under her, and she almost clings to him.
"Please... he'll be all right, won't he? They won't do anything to him?" She hates herself for being so weak. For asking of him to give reassurance when he probably needs one himself... and for asking him for reassurance that might be false, above all.
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Holding her slightly tighter, he nods. "Yes, love. He will be all right, and we will bring him back home."
That wasn't a lie. They would bring him back, somehow. They had to.
That second part of what she asked, however, he's not sure just how well he can promise it. They both knew Death Eaters. They both knew what could happen... "He will be safe and sound soon, Dora. I promise. I swear it, love." Another kiss, and he holds her closer.
"What Snape did, that was not your fault. Just how it wasn't Harry's. We all trusted Snape. And he... He took advantage of that trust. Of the situation, but this is not your fault. I need you to believe me, Dora." He turns to her then, his voice softening. "Do you believe me?"
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But that's one of the things about Remus, isn't it. He never does say empty, unthinking words.
"Th- thank you. I'd... if you think there is something... I could actually accomplish... you'll tell me, right?" Where is her knowledge that she's really really good now?
Gone.
At his soft but firm belief... persuasion though, her eyes finally fill with tears. She wishes she could believe, because he asks, but that would be self-deception. "But it was. I was there to stop it from happening, and I failed. If I had not, if I had taken him out, as I should have... As I so firmly believed I could! He'd not have had the opportunity to get anywhere near Teddy.
"My failure.
"I'm not good enough."
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His heart breaks once more as he listens to her, and his brow furrows deeply. No, love. No, please, no, don't think that... "You did not fail, Dora. You are good enough. You did everything you could, you... You did not fail."
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"I'm sorry, my love. So... very sorry."
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His hold on her loosens, just because he frames her face gently with his hands. He needs her to look at him when he says this; he needs her to believe him.
"You have nothing - nothing, love - to be sorry for. You did...everything you could. You tried to stop him." He, on the other hand, had done nothing. He had trusted Severus. He had said how he had changed, he had believed him...
"We will find him. I swear to you, our son will be back soon. Our baby will be back soon." He braves a smile and he ignores the way his eyes manage to start stinging again. "And when he is, we will smother him with so much attention that he will be sick of us. You'll see, love."
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"But Merlin..." She gasps, thinking of what might be... and closes her eyes, "I should have done more."
ooc: Oh right. Well, at least Dolohov got in-game Tonks back to angry. She had no drop of fight in her till his owl to Remus. But... he's hurting her son. He's hurting her husband!
Do you think, the way it's addressed, Tonks is there when when Remus receives that owl?
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"Dora, you. did. plenty. There was nothing else that anyone could have done. And you saw who it was, we knew who to look for when Harry found you." He kisses her forehead then, lingering, before whispering softly against her skin. "Please, love... Please do not torture yourself like this."
ooc: There are no words that can really explain how livid Remus is. I have been trying to write a response, but he's... ...you can probably imagine.
We could play it out that way, if you want...?
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Her lips twitch, humourlessly. "Oh, I didn't see him... well I did see him entering the dormitory, but he's head of the house, and I wasn't sure it was him, and that he was moving in, and..." She bites her lip, cutting herself out. "I couldn't see him. He had the cloak on. He talked to me afterwards though... I was not his 'mission'. It should have been me..." A hard breath through clenched throat, and she leans her head so towards him. "I... I will try not to." She means that, as her hands tighten around him.
"How are you?"
ooc: Livid. Yeah. If Remus gets Furry, then Tonks wants Dolohov. Badly ( ... )
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Kill him, the beast inside him snarls very clearly in his ear. Kill him. Get him. Hunt him NOW. Blood. His blood. Severus' blood, it's only fair. KILL HIM. He sacrificed Teddy; now it's his turn.
There has only been very few instances when his anger flares this way; when he's so willing to give in to the beast he usually buries deep down when there's no full moon. Once had been with Peter at the shack. Another time with Bellatrix, when she had taken Harry. Then it had been with Fenrir. Now it's with Severus. He had touched his family. He had hurt his family. He was still hurting his wife ( ... )
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"He... That would be lovely, if he did, wouldn't it?"
ooc: *stares at his comment on Ted* No, he's not going alone. He just isn't. If he makes the thread locked, she's just going to go after him. And I'm sure you can see that.
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"It would be." A beat. "It's foolish to think so, perhaps, but... I can't help it."
ooc: Actually, I think he'll just do a challenge post in HPSWS for now. If Dolohov shows up, then she can show up too. If not, it can serve as a way of him informing others of what he got.
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Feeling the tremor still, she pulls back a little, to look at him. She'd... like to think of a way right now for him to be able to release that anger. But her mind's locked down. Room of Requirement? She blinks at her own thought.
"I really wonder what the Room of Requirement would hold for us, if we were to walk into it right now."
Oh yeah, her mind seems to be shooting random sparks. Just not anything really useful.
ooc: Ahh, challenge post. She'd show up, yes. If Dolohov does. Just hoping it won't mean more harm for Teddy... *wibbles*
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But he trails off, not willing himself to continue; if he continues to get his hopes up, then...
...no. He just can't.
ooc: :X I hope not. But, like I said, if he doesn't? He could still tell her about the owl he got.
I have to log off for a bit, though, but I'll be back later. <3
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