I'm moving to dreamwidth soon because of the new privacy policy. Doing my book blog first, though.

Whenever I feel insecure about the smut I'm writing, I go read something on literotica.com.

Then I still feel bad, but not about my writing.

Had a dream that my father came home, and when he saw all the food, he was like "What is this shit doing in my house?"

And we had to explain that we did not expect him to come home, because he was dead.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eKShCgTyUT0&t=0s

More important than my sad case of the horn is that the What the Fuck Am I Watching? podcast now has its own youtube channel. I've linked you to the video version of their review of Neil Breen's new movie ( Read more... )

Recently I dug all of my old journals out and put them in a big plastic box. I also photographed every single one of them.

27 years worth.

But I made the mistake of reading some of them, and now I am experiencing Feelings again.

Also Horniness.

I don't like it.

I am Sad and A Mess.

And Horny.

when the "parental discretion is advised" thing comes up while I'm watching TV
trying to remember how to make pie crust
bread
various things I see in the supermarket
libraries
we need to find a new home for the snake
stand-up comedy
jigsaw puzzles

I actually feel a little better today, except for one thing.

When he was hugging me, my Uncle Terry touched my boob.

The first time, I kind of dismissed it.

But the second time, he waited until I was alone at my table at lunch, told me his wife wanted me to hug me, and then, his hand LINGERED. Shit, he practically palmed that fatbag ( Read more... )

So to cope I have been playing lots of flash dress-up games (I think it's flash, I froget), watching "Sarah & Duck" on netflix, and staying up until 3 in the morning to watch Columbo on TV.

I'm exhausted and in a lot of physical pain.

Today I spoke at my dad's memorial service. I was crying and I don't remember what I said.

I just really miss

My daddy's dead. They took him off the respirator and he died.

I can't..

My dad went into hospice care today, and soon they are taking him off the ventilator.