0455: Being a Squib - Molly Short

[pottersues]

Would you guys believe that Hallmark's first Christmas displays go up in July? It's depressing... but not depressing enough to cancel out my joy at hearing that there will be DVD's of Matantei Loki Ragnarok!

TITLE: Being A Squib
PERPETRATOR: Flippy Hair

SUE-O-METER:

Comments

[loonobsessedax]

Ouch. This burns. Especially because the inner grammar stickler in me has already been roused by reading Eats, Shoots and Leaves today. Great book. The Suethors all need to read it.

[littlewings04]

Marvellous book. Made me rethink comma usage and grammar on the whole. Incorrect apostrophes make me see red now.

[salophile]

This is off-topic, but your icon is delightful. It makes me laugh every time I see it. ^_^

[inuki42]

*whimper* The bonus-Sue at the end stole my name... make it stop..

No commas is almost better than misplaced commas. Misplaced commas make me read the sentence, then go "wait, what?" and reread it a few times because I got confused. No commas make me think "stupid author" and keep going.

Make the pain go away.. please?

[coocoocthulhu]

Molly Short
Y'know, I found a way to read this crap. Just replace "Molly" with "Martin" and it becomes funnier... kinda. You have to picture him in one of his better roles for it work. Like the bit in Ghostbusters where he gets mauled by the hell-dogs.

"Cool!" Said Molly. So Molly tried it she had her eyes shut when she opened them she was
lying in a hospital bed. The sickly sweet sterilized stench (A/N: Woo for alliteration) of the hospital invaded her senses and she nearly retched for the horrible feeling in her head.
"I'm sorry," said a blurry white figure standing next to her bed, "There's nothing we can do. She must be put down."
"But doctor, aren't there ways to treat her?" said a slightly different blurry white figure. "Surely we can... we can send her to a writing class! She'll get better, one day!"
"No," said the 'Doctor', who was now beginning to look like comedian Dave Foley, "She's a Sue. It's too late for her now."
Yes, I know even the best of us start of with Sues. I know. Shut up.

Droco
Baggins?

"A M_U_D_B_L_O_O_D!"

[media_res]

Droco
Baggins?

*rooooooooooolls*

[carriepika]

..... >.>

I really hate to burst your coping mechanism for getting through this fic but....

That wasn't Martin Short. That was Rick Moranis. <.<

>.>
*runs away before she can be shot for pointing that out*

[coocoocthulhu]

....oh yeah.

Actually, what makes it even funnier is the fact that, in my head, all of Martin Short's funnier roles were actually played by Rick Moranis.
Which kind of sucks for Martin Short, and the Sue. Because now it's not funny anymore.

[wildwolf15]

I love you, Tviokh. -hugs and gives chocolate-

[capt_duck]

WHERE ARE MARY'S PARENTS

[mrben]

Perhaps if I'd just read your post a little more closely, I would have seen that mine was entirely redundant. Kudos!

correction

[capt_duck]

*MOLLY'S PARENTS

[xyla82]

mwahahahaha!!
You took the thoughts out of my brain and put them into type. :D