Going on vacation for a while...

I feel like complete shit. So many things are happening, things beyond my control, which means my tears are on overdrive currently. I have inner stuff, out stuff, and when that gets put together? No...

I keep going through these "phases", but I have yet to decode what they mean. It's like, most of the time, I hate being, well, female. Or, not the whole "female" part, but, I guess, a "girl". The pronouns used for me can often make me cringe.

The thought of living life as a boy excites me, but I don't know why. I've looked up the terms transgender ( Read more... )

I want her so badly right now. I feel like I'm choking.

So many times I feel like giving into these standards set out by others. Every once in a while, I'll feel incredibly inadequate as a girl, just because I have short hair, or because I don't wear makeup. Sometimes, I feel like I can't identify as "femme" because of my short hair, ridiculous as that sounds ( Read more... )

Heh heh, I less than three typos.

I'm getting slightly annoyed by normal human conversation. I know the fault is all mine, but is it really too much to find someone who's mind wanders as thoroughly as mine? All I want is... someone who still has imagination. Someone who's not afraid to play pretend, despite her age.

My life is nothing but a play of ( Read more... )

    It's raining right now. I shouldn't be here. I shouldn't be on this computer, on this website, not even in this room. But... I'm addicted. To what? Heh, perhaps this site, perhaps the internet. I personally believe I just hate my reality so much, I make up for it in 0's and 1's.

Ah, I love being a geek.

Geek geek geek. I'm a nerd geek ( Read more... )

    I looked in the mirror today. All I saw was a fried raccoon.

My non-existent hair was frizzed into a cone-shape blob of fuzz atop my head. Then my eyes. Oh, god, my eyes. They weren't there. Just big, dark bags in their place.

So, there was that, and added to pale skin and a crusty nose?

Ooh, I hate being sick.

    So, I have fallen ill upon these last few days of school. Only my luck, only me... Why don't I get sick during winter? Does the heat of summer and joy of vacation leave me as a breeding ground for bacteria?

Oh, well, I get to stay home with my teddy bear. I call him Edward. He's probably my best friend. Heh heh, I'm such a loser.

Horrendously bad poetry I wrote at school.

antidepressant
a relapse in taste;
quite refine.
what will it then become,
especially of me?
who are they,
judges of poor quality,
who do so out of indirect revenge?

i am but with the sick and the ill,
meant to scavenger across life,
colored vermin pouring into my mouth
for my "well being".
only with hope they do not ( Read more... )