Day 98: I'm Dreaming Of An Arrogant Christmas

[tamaryokucha]

CRACKFIC GENERATOR TIEM.

To explain, your mod was bored enough to insert random things into a fanfic generator regarding Maoshenko. Awkward writing and lulz ensues. Some of which our Plushy turns into a woman after eating a cake, or takes care of Mao the crane wife CAT PRINCESS. I AM NOT MAKING THIS UP.

Comments

[aramaki_tokio]

IDEK WTH IS THIS LOL
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Platinum LoveEvgeni finished packing. Ever since Edvin, his own true love, had been lost at sea, Evgeni had been good feelings

[tamaryokucha]

IDEK WHAT THIS IS, BUT IT'S GLORIOUS.

[aramaki_tokio]

I DON'T FUCKING KNOW WHAT THE HECK I'M DOING BUT WHATEVER. I PRESENT TO THEE, A MORE GLORIOUS SNAPSHOT OF WHAT WOULD HAVE HAPPENED IF W. SHAKESPEARE HIMSELF LIVES DURING THE WINTER OLYS.

-----
Evgeni and Stephane
by William Shakespeare

Enter Evgeni

Stephane appears above at a window

Evgeni:
But, soft! what light through yonder window breaks?
It is the zebra, and Stephane is the magical zebra.
Arise, platinum magical zebra, and kiss the flying swan.
See, how he leans his nose upon his mullet!
O, that I were a glove upon that mullet,
That I might touch that nose!

Stephane:
O Evgeni, Evgeni! wherefore art thou Evgeni?
What's in a name? That which we call a hair
By any other name would smell as beautiful
Dost thou love me? I know thou wilt say "like the magical flying platinum zebra prancing on a meadow"
And I will take thy word; yet if thou swear'st,
Thou mayst prove awesome.

Evgeni:
Swain, by yonder flying swan I swear
That tips in Sochi, Russia the perfect platinum medal--

Stephane:O, swear not by the swan, the flawless swan

[tamaryokucha]

THIS IS BEAUTIFUL AND GLORIOUS AND SO RELEVANT TO THIS COMMN'S INTERESTS.

YOU JUST WON YOURSELF OVER 9000 PLATINUM MEDALS.

I COMMEND YOU, AND I AM TEMPTED TO PUT THIS IN THE COMMUNITY PROFILE.

COULD I: Y/N/GTFO?

[tamaryokucha]

The Battle For The Ring

In the sea, Evgeni kissed his ring. He had been busy with the ring for hours and now wanted nothing more than a radient cuddle or a charming massage from his lover Johnny

[aramaki_tokio]

LORD OF THE PLATINUM RING, YO DAWG!!!!!

[tamaryokucha]

LOL, HOW IS PRINCESS J THE PLATINUM ONE THOUGH?

[aramaki_tokio]

EVGENI'S PLATINUMNESS MUST HAVE RUBBED ON JOHNNY.

[aramaki_tokio]

An Awesome Day To KissEvgeni stepped beautifully out into the flawless sunshine, and admired Stephane's nose. "Ah," he sighed, "That's a platinum sight

[tamaryokucha]

OMG BRO, I JUST GOT THE SWANPLUSH VERSION

[aramaki_tokio]

OMG YOU GOT IT TOO /BROFIST

[tamaryokucha]

>8D

[oudeteron]

I'VE ALREADY MUTILATED A COUPLE FANDOMS WITH THIS GENERATOR, NICE TO SEE IT AGAIN. XD

(It's awesome how it lets you pick the most appropriate words for the ship as well. IC crack, or something.)

[tamaryokucha]

A Medal In Time

On a loving and charming morning, Evgeni sat in the sea. It was Valentine's Day and he was all alone. His eyes ached in sorrow for the secret love that he could never share. How could he expect Johnny to love someone with a pristine heart?

Eloquently, he began to recite a poem he had composed. "Ah, my love is like a squalid ardent mullet, all on a summer's day. I wish my Johnny would kiss me, in his own American way..."

"Do you?" Johnny sat down beside Evgeni and put his hand on Evgeni's hand. "I think that could be arranged."

Evgeni gasped briskly. "But what about my pristine heart?"

"I like it," Johnny said lovingly. "I think it's Russian."

They came together and their kiss was fluttering like a bird on its first flight.

"I love you," Evgeni said gingerly.

"I love you too," Johnny replied and kissed him.

They bought a swan, moved in together, and lived flawlessly ever after.

LOLOLOLOLOL.