Okay, so yesterday was a day of reckoning. And after several hours of moving through stages of despair, hurt, anger, hopelessness, and posting, what I am sure, with the influx of wonderful words of comfort from friends, was a very depressing livejournal entry, I am back among the living…as always, it seems, with an embarrassing insight into my ( Read more... )

Well, while the gods of the university physical plant have smiled on me and my office is no longer the temperature of a morgue, the university gods of career development have given the general fuck you. It has been made clear to me, interestingly enough without any words actually directed specifically at me (oh, the familiarity of hovering just ( Read more... )

I feel ashamed, somehow, at the things I have poured into this journal, written with the belief that no one will read it (and at least, very few do), scared I share too much of myself here, scared I have spoken too much and that makes me feel vulnerable, and I hate that, but here I am again, writing words that will show up in white type on a black ( Read more... )

There is something that has been haunting me since my last post…uh…three hours ago. As I walked to the Salty Dog, and sat there drinking a rum and diet coke and reading someone else’s poetry, a line that I wrote kept playing over in my head until I felt stupid and ridiculous and felt the need to make a slight correction. I wrote about my friend ( Read more... )

I finally find my way back here. This livejournal has turned into more a monthly update. Oh well. If I know anything about myself, it is that I am far from perfect…no matter how much pain I will endure to strive for it ( Read more... )

I feel this urge to write, but am not quite sure what it is I really want to say ( Read more... )

Well...I haven't been exactly doing so hot with this livejournal thing ( Read more... )

I had the strangest dream last night. It began with an approaching storm (not too deep, here, in Florida), a rush to close up all these horses in a barn, my own desperate search for Pass (my baby), and then things began to change...the screams of the horses became the cries of a child, a young girl, and the horses became people, trapped within ( Read more... )

Well...here I am, setting up this livejournal. To be honest, it feels odd. It's not that I don't have enough self-centered, self-analyzing "fictionalized" bullshit filling in all possible, and private, blank spaces on my laptop, or, worse, that I have some burning need to speak out in some public way, my thoughts, my life. I suppose I do. Why else ( Read more... )