well im losing weight like crazy, but thats what happens when your boyfriend of 5 years kicks you out of your apartment. so ive been with my parents for a week, but today they brought up the whole how long am i going to be here thing.....christ i dont know!!!!!!!! im completely unprepared for this. im dealing pretty well i think, but between work ( Read more... )

so today i'm starting the detox. i'm not going to use the laxative tea and whatnot, since i'm either at work or school just about every waking moment. i dont think that would turn out too pleasantly lol. well, maybe try it on sunday, since i can't remember why i requested off for that day. i'm starting at:

5'9"
121 lbs
17.9 bmi

i guess i'm supposed to put my "real" feelings in this journal. this one isn't edited for my friends list. i've been feeling really shitty. purging every time i eat. i hate it. i hate purging. i can't help it. i get that feeling and then bend over and its out. i wish i could go back to when i had to gag myself. at least it took effort. every day i ( Read more... )

so this is my new journal. i need a place to vent where no one I know can read. I feel disgusting. I went to the dentist yesterday, he put me on prescription toothpaste, said the makeup of my enamel was soft and this would help. and as much as i want to keep my beautiful smile and want to be healthy, i cant stop. this is addiction. i will kill ( Read more... )