Branded to Kill

[parma_violets]

Unfortunately, Russell Brand is famous. Precisely how and why this has happened remains a mystery, but he is. So I think the best we can hope for is a few more stories like this one. Several outcomes present themselves, all of which are more entertaining than listening to him attempting comedy

Comments

[parma_violets]

Steve Jones, God yes! If ever there was a presenter who practically screams "I am a rapist", there's your boy, Metropolitan Police!

Reportedly, Brand's recent Edinburg fringe show features him reading out his coverage in the tabloids.

[whiggles]

Russell Brand is currently impossible for me to escape given that trailers for his "talk show" (I use the term loosely) occupy virtually every single commercial break on Channel 4, E4, E4+1, More4 and Film4, which unfortunately are pretty much the only channels I watch. And then, to cap it all, the bus stop at which I wait features a life-sized picture of that ape-like little man, pulling a ridiculous face like the proverbial twit that he is. Not that I hope he did rape someone, but it's difficult to deny that his being locked up for several years would provide many benefits to society. Then they really be able to say that "Russell Brand's Got Issues".

[parma_violets]

It's true - a spell in Wormwood Scrubs for him would add considerably to the gaiety of nations.

Regarding Brand in general, I think my reply to violetcreme a bit further down the page explains how I feel about him.

[gileswl]

Once again, a reason to be glad I don't have a television.

[gileswl]

and a reason for me to get rid of mine.
he is repulsive .

[parma_violets]

Identify yourself! Brand-haters need to stick together in this crazy mixed-up Brand-promoting world.

[parma_violets]

You could simulate the experience of watching a Russell Brand show without even turning your television on - just get a very bad actor to adopt a generic Mummerset accent and shot "moi ballbags!" at you, over and over again. For thirty minutes solid.

[thermaland]

I had no idea who Russell Brand is or what he does apart from seeing his posters in the Tube, until this morning (when I read his Wikipedia page). I must say I am quite proud of my avoidance skills for things/people that don't interest me.

[parma_violets]

I think even the posters would be irritating, even if I didn't know who he was. The man radiates such a smug hatefulness that even the deaf-blind could probably perceive it.

[violetcreme]

There are some things in life I don't understand, almost as if there's a comsmic joke no one included me on. Mr Brand, is one of them.

Alleged rape aside, the man is an utterly talentless, highly annoying idiot who shouldn't be allowed anywhere near a television set. His trailers for whatever he did on a thankfully non-terrestrial channel before Big Brother made me scratch my head in wonderment that anyone so devoid of any charm and who made no sense could get on screen.

Shoot him now. For me. Please ?

[parma_violets]

You think I might need persuading to kill Russell Brand? You clearly don't think very much of me - I'm a responsible citizen, and as such would take any measures possible to remove the Brand threat wherever it may be.

I think most British comedy is pretty damn bad at the moment - the only two homegrown shows that have made me laugh this year have been The IT Crowd and Time Trumpet, which suggests that we're still basically reliant on the cast and crew of The Day Today to march along and save us from our talent drought. But even among such 'notables' as Marc Wootton, Jimmy Carr and Lucy Montgomery, there's something extra-vile about Russell Brand.

I think it's because, more than anyone else on the scene at the moment, he exemplifies careerist comedy. There's no joy in his comedy - just attempts to market the "Russell Brand, Modern Libertine" persona and sell crap catchphrases. You don't have to put any effort in any more, just hit on a couple of phrases and a saleable image, and before you know it, you're "teh funniest mann in