i am a person with a mental illness. i know not who the person is without a mental illness. i know not who this person is as a person, whether she is nice or bitchy or aloof or caring or cold or outlandish or studious or creative or manic or shy or talkative or warm.

i am a scared person with a mental illness.

a depression child ( Read more... )

i know these deliciously brilliant people. when i read what they write or see what they take photos of or hear what they bang out of instruments, i feel full of ideas to create my own works of art, my own bits of myself that i can put in a form that is beautiful and pleasing to the senses, but i also feel sick to the gut at how wonderful these ( Read more... )

The sky is getting very dark, the clouds are grey-blue, the trees look very green against the sky. sarah sits at her computer in the flat she pays rent for but that she is not on the lease of, supposed to be watching crocodile dundee because it is one of those movies every australian has to see but she cannot keep her focus on it. The sky is ( Read more... )

Apparently i've had it for the last 2 weeks, and did not know anything about it. I am sick sick sick sick sick sick and so very tirrred - the words on this screen I am typing are all blurry and fdoubled. My sinuses are all blocked, my ear really hurts, my tonsils really hurt too, and I can only eat soft food. Oh no, i can only eat ice cream and ( Read more... )

I am sitting in the corner of the computer room in the library at Swinburne. I am supposed to be in class - I was supposed to be in class for the past couple of hours - but couldn't sit there being quiet and pretending to be interested in topics that do not interest me and don't have anything to do with what I want to do and are a total waste of ( Read more... )

I annoy myself at how I neglect this and my paper journal. I come on here regularly, I read my friends page and sometimes comment, but when I get to my own entries I clam up. My brain seems to freeze while it's doing what it does. History says that writing has been good for me. It is my own irrational belief that stops me. I cannot seem to ( Read more... )

Dave is in the lounge room writing a song. HAH! Just randomly, on my guitar. We had such a super night last night. Stell and Dave and me just hung out at mine, talking shit. Was so lovely ( Read more... )

I am so happy right now. My friends are amazingly gorgeous people that make me laugh and smile and love them. I am loving TAFE because there are lovely people that I love to see, and a fabulous teacher that makes her subject interesting. I am babysitting for wonderful, wonderful children that I adore spending time with. I have a beautiful ( Read more... )

Oh good god I hate hospitals. I spent yesterday in one, being re-hydrated. I was up all Tuesday night chucking - I couldn't keep WATER down! - then got the squirts in the early morning. My uncle came round to bring me maxalon and powerade, and apparently when I let him in I collapsed. He rang the ambos and they took me to Box Hill hospital cos ( Read more... )