Advent Calendar Day Sixteen - Merlin fic: The Girl in the Goblet
Day One | Avalanche, Generation Kill, Brad/Nate, R, 400 words | for pjvilar
Day Two | No Fu Manchu, Hawaii Five-0, Danny, Steve, PG, 803 words | for laceymcbain
Day Three | running away from nothing real, Inception, Eames/Ariadne, R, 1,358 words | for vinylroad
Day Four | they said a hundred times I should have died, Generation Kill, Brad/Nate, NC-17, 1,192 words | for pau494
Day Five | try again, die again, die better, Torchwood, Jack, wallpaper | for pierhias
Day Six | monsters are always hungry, darling, Generation Kill, Brad/Nate, NC-17, 1,001 words | for lunatics_word
Day Seven | The Nine Lives of Bryce Larkin, Chuck/Chrestomanci series (Diana Wynne Jones), Bryce/Chuck, PG-13, 1,760 words | for misura
Day Eight | Jump, Generation Kill, Brad/Nate, PG-13, 2,045 words | for idrilka
Day Nine | It's a White Oahu Christmas, Eureka/Hawaii Five-0/Leverage/Supernatural/White Collar, G, 1,450 words | for vonilyn
Day Ten | The Jackpot, White Collar, Neal/Peter, PG, 644 words | for lazy-daze
Day Eleven | faster than sound, Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles, John, Cameron, PG-13, 237 words | for nrrrdy_grrrl
Day Twelve | A Golden Age, Merlin (BBC), Merlin, Arthur, Gwen, (Gwaine, Lancelot, Gilli), PG, 780 words | for hypertwink
Day Thirteen | Snug, White Collar, Neal, Peter, G, 308 words | for merkuria
Day Fourteen | The Outing, Castle, Esposito/Ryan, R, 1,758 words | for aurora_84
Day Fifteen | see the light, Supernatural, Sam, wallpaper | for daisychain1957
The Girl in the Goblet [Merlin, Arthur/Merlin, PG-13, 2,712 words, for curtana. prompt: bathing. Beta by such_heights.]
The first time Merlin sees her, he's handing a goblet of wine to Arthur.
He whips the goblet behind his back instantly.
"Merlin," Arthur says, and Merlin doesn't need to be experienced in the ways and tones of Arthur to know that he doesn't appreciate having his wine goblet snatched away two inches from his grasp. The there had better be a good explanation for this is left unspoken - Arthur has tired of saying it, so he just looks it instead. The look is just as effective.
Merlin coughs. Twice. The second time he manages to sound like an old man in the last stage of consumption. "I, um, coughed into it," he says, because he doesn't want to say I saw a girl waving to me inside the goblet.
Arthur makes a moue of disgust. "You do like to keep reminding me that you are the worst manservant ever. Bring me a fresh goblet, and try not to cough, spit or throw up into it."
"Yes, Arthur," Merlin says.
He checks the wine jug before he pours, but it looks just like ordinary wine. He can't sense any magic about it either. He uses Arthur's favourite goblet and keeps an eye on it as he takes it over to Arthur.
He picks up the original goblet warily. Right now, he can't see anything out of the ordinary about it. It's red wine. A bit on the watery side, because it's early in the day so he'd diluted the jug, but still, no faces or waving hands. He shakes his head. Perhaps he imagined it. Gaius did keep him up awfully late the previous night, researching protection spells. He tips the goblet up and pours it into the slops bucket under the sideboard.
"Urgh."
Merlin looks around. "What now?" he asks Arthur.
Arthur looks at him as though he's an idiot, which is actually hard to distinguish from the usual way he looks at Merlin. "I didn't say anything, Merlin."
"Oh."
Oh. If Arthur didn't speak, and Merlin definitely didn't speak, then-
Merlin looks in the slops bucket.
The face he saw in the goblet earlier is now staring up at him from the bucket, but this time she has a horrified expression on her face. Merlin doesn't stop to think - he picks up the slop bucket and puts it rim to rim on the sideboard with Arthur's water jug.
"Phew, that's better," she says, the voice coming from the water jug now. He peers into the jug. The girl, whoever or whatever she is, is running her fingers through her hair and wriggling around as if she's trying to wash off the filth from the slops bucket.
"Who are you?" Merlin hisses, though he supposes that if she's an evil enchantress out to kill Arthur, she's probably not going to tell Merlin. Unless she's the overconfident, gloating kind of enchantress, which, come to think of it, is the sort Arthur seems to attract more often than not.
"Oh, I'm Alysse," she says. She reaches out a dainty hand and Merlin automatically puts his out to shake it. Her hand feels rather watery, not quite solid, and is small enough for him to grasp between two fingers.
She doesn't feel evil, though.
"When you've quite finished gazing at your reflection in my water jug, Narcissus - and in case you were wondering, no, your new haircut doesn't make your ears look smaller - then maybe you could, I don't know, do your job, maybe," Arthur says, in a tone that says it's more than a suggestion. "Just an idea," he adds, clearly meaning the exact opposite.
*
In the face of a violent protest against Uther's latest tax increases, an outbreak of septic boils, and Arthur throwing a hissy fit because the latest blacksmith can't get a nick out of his second favourite sword, Merlin almost forgets about Alysse.
Until he's testily washing (on Arthur's command, seconded by Gaius - honestly, it's ridiculous, expecting a servant to smell of roses). He's in his room, starkers, and he's just magicked his bowl of water nice and warm when a face pops up in it.
"Ooh, that's nice," she says, wriggling around blissfully.
"What the-" Merlin shrieks. He grabs his neck scarf and holds it protectively in front of himself.
"This almost makes up for the slops pail," she says, carrying on as though she hasn't even noticed that he's naked. "I don't suppose you have any geranium oil, do you? I do like geranium oil. It stops my skin getting wrinkled, and it smells so sweet."
"No," Merlin exclaims. "I don't have any geranium oil, and you can't just-" he waves his hands around, then realises that's a bad idea, "-jump into my water bowl in my room when I'm all naked. Or any time for that matter."
Alysse pouts. "But you invited me."
"What? No, I didn't."
"Yes, you did." She nods firmly.
"No, I didn't."
They sound like the miller and his wife in that silly play the Bloomford Players put on last Christmas. Any minute Arthur will pop up and an audience will shout he's behind you. It's surreal, and given that Merlin has regular chats with a bad-tempered dragon, that's saying something.
"You really did," she insists.
"When? How?"
"When you brought the bowl in here," Alysse says, as though she's explaining something to a child.
"The water?" Merlin asks. "Bringing water into a room is as good as inviting you in?"
Alysse nods happily.
Merlin sits on his bed. "So is that how you got into the castle? Through the water supply? One of the wells?"
"Not a well," she says. "I came here in a wine skin. I didn't like the man who was carrying it, though. He smelled bad, and it was really bumpy in the wineskin - it made me feel dizzy and it was ever such a long journey. You're much nicer than him. And Arthur is too. I like Arthur's room. His water's always nice and clean, and his wine makes me feel all woozy, but in a nice way."
Merlin gets the feeling Alysse likes to talk. She probably hasn't had anyone to talk to for a while. She just doesn't have very good timing.
"Oh, bugger." Merlin's had another bad thought. "Wine too? That's an invitation to you?"
"Wine's fun," Alysse says, giggling.
Merlin groans. Keeping Arthur from water would be tricky. Keeping him from wine would be suicidal.
*
"Merlin, you smell," is Arthur's greeting. "Didn't I tell you to wash?"
"Well, yes, but you see-"
"No, don't give me any excuses. You're too disgusting to have around," Arthur says. Merlin starts towards the door, but Arthur puts down his quill and papers and puts up his hand in the universally recognised stop signal. "No, don't think you can just head off and then disappear for the rest of the day. I know what you're like."
Merlin heaves a sigh. "So I'm too disgusting to be around you, but you won't let me go and bathe? What exactly am I to do?"
"You can bathe here."
"Here?"
"Are you an echo? Yes, here. There's a pail of water and a sponge on the side, that'll do."
Merlin brought the pail up from the well hours ago. It was cold then. It isn't going to be any warmer now. "It's cold!" he complains.
"Don't be such a baby."
"You always bathe in warm water," Merlin points out. It's a perfectly reasonable argument.
"Yes, Merlin, because I'm the prince and I have a manservant who is paid to bring me warm water for my bath. You can take a cold bath. And be quick about it - I've a lot for you to do today."
Merlin's shivering at the thought of it. He hasn't had a cold bath in ages - one of the perks of magic - but he can't do anything about the temperature of the water with Arthur in the room. He tugs off his tunic sulkily and drops it on the floor, then pulls his britches down.
His bits shrink in the chill air, and that's before he's even touched the water.
And then there's the problem of Alysse. Who may or may not be in the pail.
"What are you waiting for, Merlin? I haven't got all day to wait around for you."
Merlin half-turns around (upper half only, because shrinkage isn't something a guy wants to advertise) and glares at Arthur. Then he pours the pail of water into the bath tub. It's barely an inch at the bottom. Maybe it won't be enough for Alysse.
He steps in, grimacing, and sits down. The water barely covers his toes, and it's very cold around his nether regions. He's just picked up the sponge when Alysse pops up by his feet. He claps the sponge over his bits. "No, no, no, you can't be here," he hisses at her. "Not with Arthur in the room."
"Oh, he'll be jealous, won't he. Oops, sorry," she says, clapping her hands over her mouth. The only thing Merlin has to be grateful about right now is that her voice is as small as she is.
"Jealous? No. Why? How?" The girl's crazy, and Merlin needs to get a whole question out. "What on earth are you on about?"
"He'll be jealous of me," she says. Merlin stares at her. Alysse shrugs what he can see of her tiny shoulders. "It's obvious he's got a crush on you. I heard him talking to himself when I was in his wine jug the other day. It's kind of cute, really. So he's not going to like me being here in the bathtub with you. And I know you like him too," she adds, winking.
"Well, I work for him, I have to like him," Merlin mutters. Which is a huge cover up. He doesn't like Arthur just because he has to. He likes Arthur because of who he is, and that's despite the fact that Arthur's an annoying, arrogant git. When Merlin thinks about Arthur late at night, he can't imagine anything better than having his destiny twinned with Arthur's. Well, sometimes he thinks of other things too. Things he is not going to think about when he's naked in a bath tub.
Which, naturally, is the moment Arthur finishes writing his letters and starts to pay attention to Merlin again. "Merlin, what on earth are you muttering about? I suppose I should be glad you're not singing in the bath, but it's actually disturbing, hearing you whispering like you're talking to someone."
"Go, vamoose, scram," Merlin whispers to Alysse, making a shooing motion with his free hand in case she's got water in her ears and can't hear him properly.
"It's easier to move somewhere if I can see where I'm going," she says, then seems to get the hint that he doesn't care if it's difficult as long as she goes. She fades into the water.
As soon as she's gone, Merlin twists around. "What's the real reason you wanted me to have a bath here?" he asks.
Merlin expects Arthur to look bemused for a moment while he works out what on earth Merlin is on about, then annoyed. He expects Arthur to state - very firmly - that Merlin is a grubby manservant not fit for a prince, and unreliable if left out of Arthur's sight, and therefore Arthur has no choice in the matter but to put up with having him bathe here. Instead, Arthur looks, well, flustered. Like he's been caught out.
Hmm, maybe Alysse has a point. She must hear an awful lot of secrets, sneaking around in people's water pails and wine jugs.
"I told you, Merlin," Arthur says eventually. "I shouldn't have to repeat instructions twice. And I don't have to explain my orders."
That's really lame. Even Merlin can lie better than that, and Gaius repeatedly tells him he's a horrible liar.
Merlin is going to test the waters. Actually, Merlin is going to jump right in. "Do you have a crush on me?" he asks. He watches Arthur's reaction carefully. He's probably going to get a clip around the ear for his audacity, but Arthur never hits him hard. More like love taps, come to think of it. Merlin snorts.
Arthur's going to have to work on his poker face. Instead of giving an instant, firm denial, he manages a stuttering, flustered, no, um, no, of course not, that sounds completely fake.
"Oh my gosh, you really do. You have a crush on me!" Merlin exclaims, jumping up out of the bathtub.
"Honestly, Merlin, have you been drinking again?" Arthur asks, but he's really not convincing Merlin. And as he's not drawing his sword or looking particularly threatening, Merlin decides he might as well see how far he can go with this.
"I'm going to get some hot water," he says, and throws on his tunic. He's out of the door before Arthur can do much more than gape at him. (Arthur's very handsome - Merlin readily admits the fact - but occasionally he gets an expression on his face that makes him look like a beached flounder. That's the look he had just before Merlin ran out of the room. The fact that Merlin still finds him attractive with this expression on his face is more telling than Merlin would like. Merlin really can't deny that the crush is mutual.)
Merlin brings back two large pails full of hot water - he uses a bit of magic on the way - and tips them into the bathtub. Then he gets back into the tub. It's a perfect temperature, and with a discreet use of magic, the perfect amount of water, waist high. "What are you waiting for?" he asks Arthur. "Aren't you going to join me?"
"I don't need a bath," Arthur says.
"Neither did I, but you still made me have one," Merlin points out.
"You most certainly did need a bath. You stank."
"And you need one too," Merlin asserts. "You're filthy."
"No, I'm not," Arthur says.
Merlin leans over the side of the bathtub, picks up the slops pail, and grins to himself. Arthur isn't slow - he sees what Merlin's doing and starts moving out of the way - but he's too slow for Merlin's magically assisted aim. "Now you are," Merlin says, once Arthur's dripping dirty water onto the floor.
"I hate you," Arthur says, but he's stripping as he says it, so Merlin doesn't mind. Arthur's very muscular. Merlin's noticed it before, but this time he lets his gaze linger.
"This is cosy, isn't it," Merlin says, once Arthur's in the tub.
"It's over-crowded, that's what it is," Arthur complains, but his foot is stroking the side of Merlin's thigh. Merlin's not sure he even knows he's doing it.
Merlin picks up the sponge, dips it in the water, and instead of throwing it in Arthur's face - which he's tempted to do in revenge for all the things Arthur has thrown at him - he reaches out slowly and wipes the mess from the slops pail off the side of Arthur's face. Arthur's turning into the touch before he realises and starts to look suspicious. He opens his mouth, no doubt to throw an insult Merlin's way. Merlin decides preventative action is called for. He leans forward a bit further and kisses Arthur.
It works very well. It's also very nice, especially once Arthur starts kissing him back. Arthur's pretty good at kissing.
Of course he has to go and try to spoil it by talking. "I do not have a crush on you," he says, but then he goes back to kissing Merlin so Merlin feels there's really no point arguing. Also the shrinkage issue seems to be reversing itself, and from a quick glance down, Arthur's in the same situation, so Merlin counts that as pretty convincing proof that he's right.
*
Tomorrow, Merlin will fetch a pail of water, warm it up in his room, add some geranium oil - he's sure Gaius must have some somewhere, or maybe Gwen can help him out - and thank Alysse.
For now, he's really glad she's not in the bathtub - after all, two's company, three's a crowd.
//
If I'd had time, it would have been a lot longer. And probably pornier!
Day Two | No Fu Manchu, Hawaii Five-0, Danny, Steve, PG, 803 words | for laceymcbain
Day Three | running away from nothing real, Inception, Eames/Ariadne, R, 1,358 words | for vinylroad
Day Four | they said a hundred times I should have died, Generation Kill, Brad/Nate, NC-17, 1,192 words | for pau494
Day Five | try again, die again, die better, Torchwood, Jack, wallpaper | for pierhias
Day Six | monsters are always hungry, darling, Generation Kill, Brad/Nate, NC-17, 1,001 words | for lunatics_word
Day Seven | The Nine Lives of Bryce Larkin, Chuck/Chrestomanci series (Diana Wynne Jones), Bryce/Chuck, PG-13, 1,760 words | for misura
Day Eight | Jump, Generation Kill, Brad/Nate, PG-13, 2,045 words | for idrilka
Day Nine | It's a White Oahu Christmas, Eureka/Hawaii Five-0/Leverage/Supernatural/White Collar, G, 1,450 words | for vonilyn
Day Ten | The Jackpot, White Collar, Neal/Peter, PG, 644 words | for lazy-daze
Day Eleven | faster than sound, Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles, John, Cameron, PG-13, 237 words | for nrrrdy_grrrl
Day Twelve | A Golden Age, Merlin (BBC), Merlin, Arthur, Gwen, (Gwaine, Lancelot, Gilli), PG, 780 words | for hypertwink
Day Thirteen | Snug, White Collar, Neal, Peter, G, 308 words | for merkuria
Day Fourteen | The Outing, Castle, Esposito/Ryan, R, 1,758 words | for aurora_84
Day Fifteen | see the light, Supernatural, Sam, wallpaper | for daisychain1957
The Girl in the Goblet [Merlin, Arthur/Merlin, PG-13, 2,712 words, for curtana. prompt: bathing. Beta by such_heights.]
The first time Merlin sees her, he's handing a goblet of wine to Arthur.
He whips the goblet behind his back instantly.
"Merlin," Arthur says, and Merlin doesn't need to be experienced in the ways and tones of Arthur to know that he doesn't appreciate having his wine goblet snatched away two inches from his grasp. The there had better be a good explanation for this is left unspoken - Arthur has tired of saying it, so he just looks it instead. The look is just as effective.
Merlin coughs. Twice. The second time he manages to sound like an old man in the last stage of consumption. "I, um, coughed into it," he says, because he doesn't want to say I saw a girl waving to me inside the goblet.
Arthur makes a moue of disgust. "You do like to keep reminding me that you are the worst manservant ever. Bring me a fresh goblet, and try not to cough, spit or throw up into it."
"Yes, Arthur," Merlin says.
He checks the wine jug before he pours, but it looks just like ordinary wine. He can't sense any magic about it either. He uses Arthur's favourite goblet and keeps an eye on it as he takes it over to Arthur.
He picks up the original goblet warily. Right now, he can't see anything out of the ordinary about it. It's red wine. A bit on the watery side, because it's early in the day so he'd diluted the jug, but still, no faces or waving hands. He shakes his head. Perhaps he imagined it. Gaius did keep him up awfully late the previous night, researching protection spells. He tips the goblet up and pours it into the slops bucket under the sideboard.
"Urgh."
Merlin looks around. "What now?" he asks Arthur.
Arthur looks at him as though he's an idiot, which is actually hard to distinguish from the usual way he looks at Merlin. "I didn't say anything, Merlin."
"Oh."
Oh. If Arthur didn't speak, and Merlin definitely didn't speak, then-
Merlin looks in the slops bucket.
The face he saw in the goblet earlier is now staring up at him from the bucket, but this time she has a horrified expression on her face. Merlin doesn't stop to think - he picks up the slop bucket and puts it rim to rim on the sideboard with Arthur's water jug.
"Phew, that's better," she says, the voice coming from the water jug now. He peers into the jug. The girl, whoever or whatever she is, is running her fingers through her hair and wriggling around as if she's trying to wash off the filth from the slops bucket.
"Who are you?" Merlin hisses, though he supposes that if she's an evil enchantress out to kill Arthur, she's probably not going to tell Merlin. Unless she's the overconfident, gloating kind of enchantress, which, come to think of it, is the sort Arthur seems to attract more often than not.
"Oh, I'm Alysse," she says. She reaches out a dainty hand and Merlin automatically puts his out to shake it. Her hand feels rather watery, not quite solid, and is small enough for him to grasp between two fingers.
She doesn't feel evil, though.
"When you've quite finished gazing at your reflection in my water jug, Narcissus - and in case you were wondering, no, your new haircut doesn't make your ears look smaller - then maybe you could, I don't know, do your job, maybe," Arthur says, in a tone that says it's more than a suggestion. "Just an idea," he adds, clearly meaning the exact opposite.
*
In the face of a violent protest against Uther's latest tax increases, an outbreak of septic boils, and Arthur throwing a hissy fit because the latest blacksmith can't get a nick out of his second favourite sword, Merlin almost forgets about Alysse.
Until he's testily washing (on Arthur's command, seconded by Gaius - honestly, it's ridiculous, expecting a servant to smell of roses). He's in his room, starkers, and he's just magicked his bowl of water nice and warm when a face pops up in it.
"Ooh, that's nice," she says, wriggling around blissfully.
"What the-" Merlin shrieks. He grabs his neck scarf and holds it protectively in front of himself.
"This almost makes up for the slops pail," she says, carrying on as though she hasn't even noticed that he's naked. "I don't suppose you have any geranium oil, do you? I do like geranium oil. It stops my skin getting wrinkled, and it smells so sweet."
"No," Merlin exclaims. "I don't have any geranium oil, and you can't just-" he waves his hands around, then realises that's a bad idea, "-jump into my water bowl in my room when I'm all naked. Or any time for that matter."
Alysse pouts. "But you invited me."
"What? No, I didn't."
"Yes, you did." She nods firmly.
"No, I didn't."
They sound like the miller and his wife in that silly play the Bloomford Players put on last Christmas. Any minute Arthur will pop up and an audience will shout he's behind you. It's surreal, and given that Merlin has regular chats with a bad-tempered dragon, that's saying something.
"You really did," she insists.
"When? How?"
"When you brought the bowl in here," Alysse says, as though she's explaining something to a child.
"The water?" Merlin asks. "Bringing water into a room is as good as inviting you in?"
Alysse nods happily.
Merlin sits on his bed. "So is that how you got into the castle? Through the water supply? One of the wells?"
"Not a well," she says. "I came here in a wine skin. I didn't like the man who was carrying it, though. He smelled bad, and it was really bumpy in the wineskin - it made me feel dizzy and it was ever such a long journey. You're much nicer than him. And Arthur is too. I like Arthur's room. His water's always nice and clean, and his wine makes me feel all woozy, but in a nice way."
Merlin gets the feeling Alysse likes to talk. She probably hasn't had anyone to talk to for a while. She just doesn't have very good timing.
"Oh, bugger." Merlin's had another bad thought. "Wine too? That's an invitation to you?"
"Wine's fun," Alysse says, giggling.
Merlin groans. Keeping Arthur from water would be tricky. Keeping him from wine would be suicidal.
*
"Merlin, you smell," is Arthur's greeting. "Didn't I tell you to wash?"
"Well, yes, but you see-"
"No, don't give me any excuses. You're too disgusting to have around," Arthur says. Merlin starts towards the door, but Arthur puts down his quill and papers and puts up his hand in the universally recognised stop signal. "No, don't think you can just head off and then disappear for the rest of the day. I know what you're like."
Merlin heaves a sigh. "So I'm too disgusting to be around you, but you won't let me go and bathe? What exactly am I to do?"
"You can bathe here."
"Here?"
"Are you an echo? Yes, here. There's a pail of water and a sponge on the side, that'll do."
Merlin brought the pail up from the well hours ago. It was cold then. It isn't going to be any warmer now. "It's cold!" he complains.
"Don't be such a baby."
"You always bathe in warm water," Merlin points out. It's a perfectly reasonable argument.
"Yes, Merlin, because I'm the prince and I have a manservant who is paid to bring me warm water for my bath. You can take a cold bath. And be quick about it - I've a lot for you to do today."
Merlin's shivering at the thought of it. He hasn't had a cold bath in ages - one of the perks of magic - but he can't do anything about the temperature of the water with Arthur in the room. He tugs off his tunic sulkily and drops it on the floor, then pulls his britches down.
His bits shrink in the chill air, and that's before he's even touched the water.
And then there's the problem of Alysse. Who may or may not be in the pail.
"What are you waiting for, Merlin? I haven't got all day to wait around for you."
Merlin half-turns around (upper half only, because shrinkage isn't something a guy wants to advertise) and glares at Arthur. Then he pours the pail of water into the bath tub. It's barely an inch at the bottom. Maybe it won't be enough for Alysse.
He steps in, grimacing, and sits down. The water barely covers his toes, and it's very cold around his nether regions. He's just picked up the sponge when Alysse pops up by his feet. He claps the sponge over his bits. "No, no, no, you can't be here," he hisses at her. "Not with Arthur in the room."
"Oh, he'll be jealous, won't he. Oops, sorry," she says, clapping her hands over her mouth. The only thing Merlin has to be grateful about right now is that her voice is as small as she is.
"Jealous? No. Why? How?" The girl's crazy, and Merlin needs to get a whole question out. "What on earth are you on about?"
"He'll be jealous of me," she says. Merlin stares at her. Alysse shrugs what he can see of her tiny shoulders. "It's obvious he's got a crush on you. I heard him talking to himself when I was in his wine jug the other day. It's kind of cute, really. So he's not going to like me being here in the bathtub with you. And I know you like him too," she adds, winking.
"Well, I work for him, I have to like him," Merlin mutters. Which is a huge cover up. He doesn't like Arthur just because he has to. He likes Arthur because of who he is, and that's despite the fact that Arthur's an annoying, arrogant git. When Merlin thinks about Arthur late at night, he can't imagine anything better than having his destiny twinned with Arthur's. Well, sometimes he thinks of other things too. Things he is not going to think about when he's naked in a bath tub.
Which, naturally, is the moment Arthur finishes writing his letters and starts to pay attention to Merlin again. "Merlin, what on earth are you muttering about? I suppose I should be glad you're not singing in the bath, but it's actually disturbing, hearing you whispering like you're talking to someone."
"Go, vamoose, scram," Merlin whispers to Alysse, making a shooing motion with his free hand in case she's got water in her ears and can't hear him properly.
"It's easier to move somewhere if I can see where I'm going," she says, then seems to get the hint that he doesn't care if it's difficult as long as she goes. She fades into the water.
As soon as she's gone, Merlin twists around. "What's the real reason you wanted me to have a bath here?" he asks.
Merlin expects Arthur to look bemused for a moment while he works out what on earth Merlin is on about, then annoyed. He expects Arthur to state - very firmly - that Merlin is a grubby manservant not fit for a prince, and unreliable if left out of Arthur's sight, and therefore Arthur has no choice in the matter but to put up with having him bathe here. Instead, Arthur looks, well, flustered. Like he's been caught out.
Hmm, maybe Alysse has a point. She must hear an awful lot of secrets, sneaking around in people's water pails and wine jugs.
"I told you, Merlin," Arthur says eventually. "I shouldn't have to repeat instructions twice. And I don't have to explain my orders."
That's really lame. Even Merlin can lie better than that, and Gaius repeatedly tells him he's a horrible liar.
Merlin is going to test the waters. Actually, Merlin is going to jump right in. "Do you have a crush on me?" he asks. He watches Arthur's reaction carefully. He's probably going to get a clip around the ear for his audacity, but Arthur never hits him hard. More like love taps, come to think of it. Merlin snorts.
Arthur's going to have to work on his poker face. Instead of giving an instant, firm denial, he manages a stuttering, flustered, no, um, no, of course not, that sounds completely fake.
"Oh my gosh, you really do. You have a crush on me!" Merlin exclaims, jumping up out of the bathtub.
"Honestly, Merlin, have you been drinking again?" Arthur asks, but he's really not convincing Merlin. And as he's not drawing his sword or looking particularly threatening, Merlin decides he might as well see how far he can go with this.
"I'm going to get some hot water," he says, and throws on his tunic. He's out of the door before Arthur can do much more than gape at him. (Arthur's very handsome - Merlin readily admits the fact - but occasionally he gets an expression on his face that makes him look like a beached flounder. That's the look he had just before Merlin ran out of the room. The fact that Merlin still finds him attractive with this expression on his face is more telling than Merlin would like. Merlin really can't deny that the crush is mutual.)
Merlin brings back two large pails full of hot water - he uses a bit of magic on the way - and tips them into the bathtub. Then he gets back into the tub. It's a perfect temperature, and with a discreet use of magic, the perfect amount of water, waist high. "What are you waiting for?" he asks Arthur. "Aren't you going to join me?"
"I don't need a bath," Arthur says.
"Neither did I, but you still made me have one," Merlin points out.
"You most certainly did need a bath. You stank."
"And you need one too," Merlin asserts. "You're filthy."
"No, I'm not," Arthur says.
Merlin leans over the side of the bathtub, picks up the slops pail, and grins to himself. Arthur isn't slow - he sees what Merlin's doing and starts moving out of the way - but he's too slow for Merlin's magically assisted aim. "Now you are," Merlin says, once Arthur's dripping dirty water onto the floor.
"I hate you," Arthur says, but he's stripping as he says it, so Merlin doesn't mind. Arthur's very muscular. Merlin's noticed it before, but this time he lets his gaze linger.
"This is cosy, isn't it," Merlin says, once Arthur's in the tub.
"It's over-crowded, that's what it is," Arthur complains, but his foot is stroking the side of Merlin's thigh. Merlin's not sure he even knows he's doing it.
Merlin picks up the sponge, dips it in the water, and instead of throwing it in Arthur's face - which he's tempted to do in revenge for all the things Arthur has thrown at him - he reaches out slowly and wipes the mess from the slops pail off the side of Arthur's face. Arthur's turning into the touch before he realises and starts to look suspicious. He opens his mouth, no doubt to throw an insult Merlin's way. Merlin decides preventative action is called for. He leans forward a bit further and kisses Arthur.
It works very well. It's also very nice, especially once Arthur starts kissing him back. Arthur's pretty good at kissing.
Of course he has to go and try to spoil it by talking. "I do not have a crush on you," he says, but then he goes back to kissing Merlin so Merlin feels there's really no point arguing. Also the shrinkage issue seems to be reversing itself, and from a quick glance down, Arthur's in the same situation, so Merlin counts that as pretty convincing proof that he's right.
*
Tomorrow, Merlin will fetch a pail of water, warm it up in his room, add some geranium oil - he's sure Gaius must have some somewhere, or maybe Gwen can help him out - and thank Alysse.
For now, he's really glad she's not in the bathtub - after all, two's company, three's a crowd.
//
If I'd had time, it would have been a lot longer. And probably pornier!